Mental illness in New Zealand

**SwanTiger** · 11th April 2006, 02:33

Seems to be a healthy discussion of this in a couple of the other threads so I thought it'd be worthwile starting a fresh one. Personally, I'd like to see some intelligent and "passionate" discussing about the issues that we face not just as bikers but as human beings living in a society togeather.

Mental illness is strife with complex marketing from companies which manipulate our minds into believing things. All sorts of issues unique to New Zealand and similar to other countries effect us equally and it is the character or personality inside us (or split personalities for some) that makes the difference in how we are effected.

I think two points worth discussing are the support and attitude shown to people with problems and the understanding and awareness of those fortuante enough to not be serial killers (hey, its just a hobby).

One of my main gripes is the attitude not from the "ignorant sods" but those who think they know and understand. Sometimes trying to help does more harm than good.

And this is a topic everyone should have an opinion on. Because statistics show that your neighbour is more likely to be an axe murderer with six different personalities than Elle McPherson who likes to walk around partly nude in her self branded underwear.

What would you do if you found out that a KB member you like riding with has a problem with depression or any other disorder?

In my opinion, I think its those who take it upon themselves to help that member embed the problem and make matters worse.

On a personal note, I experienced that first hand at school as I had a mild form of Aspergers syndrome which means you basically can't come to terms with many social situations and a few other things ("emotionally retarded"). The kids in my class were told about this and treated me differently. As a result, I ended up bashing most of them for been helpful and it made me an angry young man. Then I started boxing at a young age and was around people who just didn't give a fuck and gave me a beating. It was great. Now look, I don't try and kill people anymore and I can even like some people. Its amazing what a bit of ignorance can do when applied appropriately.

Short speal. Should get the ball rolling. I wonder if i'll get any intelligent red rep without spelling mistakes... isn't it ammusing 99% of red rep comes from people who can't spell properly. Lyk go bak 2 skool.

**James Deuce** · 11th April 2006, 06:54

IMO most people treat you like you have a plague as soon as the words "Mental Illness" are out of your mouth.

Just about every band I've been in has had one band member with either serious depression or manic depression (brain chemistry imbalance resulting in cycles of depression and manic behaviour if not medicated - only one of the MD's I've worked with hasn't used it as a crutch for hideously bad behaviour - very good guy, that one).

The only thing you can do to "help" is give them enough shit to keep them performing to the required level, and fire them when they don't. Compassionately of course.

In the Corporate work environment a bout of depression will kill your career, and you will get used as the whipping boy for everything that goes wrong in your department. Of course you don't have the mental fortitude to "fight" back so you get exploited as well resulting in a downward spiral of "acopia" and tiredness which reinforces negative behaviours and brain chemstry changes.

If you have a mental illness, for fucks sake don't tell anyone you work with, keep it between you and a medical professional, and maybe your partner, but only if you know your partner isn't going to laugh in your face because you just need to get over it and stop wallowing in self-pity. I've had an employee's partner loudly tell everyone at the table at the Christmas party that the, "wanker just needs to get over himself."

Basically, "normal" people don't get it and don't want to.

**SixPackBack** · 11th April 2006, 07:11

Yup thats me 15 wasted years, countless thousands of dollars, Family suffering, Doctors, Psychiatrists the whole shabang.
How did I stop?
I HARDENED UP.
Sorry to those I offend but the solution to problems such as mentioned are so simple a 4 year old knows the solution.
Take drugs..stop
Cut yourself...stop, it stains the carpet
Skinny...eat
My addiction has had me through the wringer and in the end the only person that could help me was me..everything else was self serving pity that made the problem worse.

**Grahameeboy** · 11th April 2006, 07:25

I could say a lot on this topic but I will keep it brief.

Sixpack.....truely pleased that you sorted out yourself....however, remember that not everyone is as strong as you.....

My view is we should use our strengths to help others weaknesses. How many people show signs of trouble, suicide notes etc when it is obvious and no one even recognises this.

I am not saying that we should all become Counsellors, however, most of these people are crying out for help and help can just take the form of being a friend and showing that you care because often they feel alone.

My Pony's worth.

**Fishy** · 11th April 2006, 08:06

I have a friend who suffers from depression quite badly.

I have had to get him admitted into the South Auckland Mental Health Unit twice as he was a risk to himself.

He finds it very hard to speak about it with most people and would rather shut himself away in his room and not deal with anything....which just makes matters worse.

After being discharged from the mental health unit he was appointed a social worker who was supposed to visit on a regular basis and keep tabs on his progress and general well being back in normal life....he came once and haven't heard from him again.

Its really hard sometimes trying to help somone who doesn't really want to help themselves..sometimes I really struggle trying to deal with helping him but I won't give up.

He came out of Manaki House just recently and is trying to get back on his feet again, but with bills coming out of his ears and finance companies that don't take mental health into consideration when applying to possibly put payments off by a week or two it makes things hard. And with him starting a new job as he doesn't mix and mingle and is really self concious about everything and would just rather not talk to anyone is going to be difficult for him too.

The follow up by social workers from what I have seen is almost a waste of time.... they came over and asked how he is, he could quite easily lie and say he's fine (when in reality he is far from fine) and thats it the social worker is no longer needed. Then my friend stopped taking his medication as he couldn't afford it as he couldn't deal with work and it back on the downward spiral again.... very vicious circle!.

**Sniper** · 11th April 2006, 08:36

I had a mental illness when I was younger. Maybe I still do (At least according to friends and family I do) But if someone approached me and wanted me to talk about it, Im sorry but I wouldn't.

I think the younger generation need to talk it out as it affects them when they get older. Me, I got over it, (I hope)

**Grahameeboy** · 11th April 2006, 08:37

Originally Posted by Fishslayer

I
Its really hard sometimes trying to help somone who doesn't really want to help themselves..sometimes I really struggle trying to deal with helping him but I won't give up.
.

Your struggles are worth it and although it may not seem so, your friend appreciates it..............he needs your strength matey......

**Fishy** · 11th April 2006, 09:00

Yeah I know he must appreciate me wanting to help him, I am the only one he will talk to when he gets really bad.

**Hitcher** · 11th April 2006, 09:18

Depression is an evil, evil thing. Both for the sufferer and those close to them. And it's badly understood by many. Hopefully the efforts of the "Like minds like us" campaign and the "stress" provisions now in the Health and Safety in Employment Act will help improve people's understanding and tolerance, not only of depression, but also a range of other mental illnesses.

**Paul in NZ** · 11th April 2006, 09:24

Weeellllll.....

I think in life, everyone of us, sooner or later faces our Waterloo. Be it physical, mental or maybe just a set of circurstances that require you to rise up above the ordinary and achieve something you really didn't think was possible (for yourself). The achievement can (in the global sense) be quite minor and you need not even be 100% successful but I beleive that failing to at least attempt that challenge has a detrimental effect on you life.

On the other side of the coin, every person I ever met that I have some genuine respect for has had to overcome or manage some sort of issue. People are broken by life nearly every day and the ones that manage to keep going and repair themselves (even imperfectly) gain something.

Like everyone else, I have a story.. Well OK a whole book but the bit thats relevant is that I have Type 1 Diabetes. Some days are really shite and your blood sugars bounce around all over the place and when they are low, well lets just say you can get a bit cranky! You become obsessed about accress to food at the right times so if you are on a trip, some times you can't wait an hour to get to a much nicer cafe', you need to eat now or your whole day is screwed. You can tell people this, but they don't always get it. Even waiting a hour for lunch on a big group ride can become a real problem, you get anxious ('cos it can get really messy) so you get a bit short with people etc.

Another issue can be having a hypo at night, you are tired as all next day, people don't quite get that.

Coupled with that is my general disposition. I have a pretty staunch moralistic view on life. I don't expect others to conform to it but I don't see any need to bend my standards to fit in with others or be 'popular' or anything. I'm naturally a bit of a hermit and if you give me a book and a stereo I'm very happy with my own company thanks. In fact, I really don't like a lot of people.... I'm not deliberately rude (or at least I try not to be) and quite a few people find me a bit odd!

However, I'm happy! I have the love of a good woman and peace in my heart.

Now, the point of all this. In this day and age, I would agree with Jim2. I doubt that I would admit to a mental illness at work unless it was very obvious. My own peculiar character coupled with my medical condition has seen me get into trouble at times. Be careful!

Paul N

**scumdog** · 11th April 2006, 09:32

I have to 'assist' Mental Health quite a bit, often with repeat patients (and it is keeping me away from 'real' Police work - well if I deal with anything that is not 'real Police work' that should be the catch cry according to some)

And by the time we are called in by MH the patient is at their worst and physical action is needed so I tend to have a jaundiced view of things and wary around those with obvious psych disorders.

Worried about what the long-term effects of this job and shift work does to my head - time will tell but with a bit of luck there'll be zero effect.

**Rashika** · 11th April 2006, 09:46

Quite frankly as long as someone who has a psychological illness (or other illness) has it under control, albeit with medication or another way, then i dont really give a damn whether they have one or not.
It isn't my business unless they chose to tell me, and wouldn't change my opinion of them at all... why should it? A psych illness is no different to any other, IF it is managed.

If it isn't, then that really is another scenario...

Altho in Pauls case, it would be good to know what to do in an emergency, could be a bit scary otherwise

**ManDownUnder** · 11th April 2006, 09:50

My position on Mental Health is really simple.

1) I want to help if I reasonably can, and it is appropriate for me to do so
2) I don't know what I don't know. I DO know I'm not an expert and I'm willing to learn... so teach me

**Paul in NZ** · 11th April 2006, 09:52

Originally Posted by Rashika

Altho in Pauls case, it would be good to know what to do in an emergency, could be a bit scary otherwise

Keep me quiet and give me beer....

nah.. there is always someone I ride with that knows whats what and best thing is anything sugary, there will be something in my tankbag or pocket - always! Call the ambos, they will give me a shot and a lecture... (never happened - yet)

Paul N

**Rashika** · 11th April 2006, 09:57

Originally Posted by Paul in NZ

Keep me quiet and give me beer....

nah.. there is always someone I ride with that knows whats what and best thing is anything sugary, there will be something in my tankbag or pocket - always! Call the ambos, they will give me a shot and a lecture... (never happened - yet)

Paul N

yeah, i figured something along those lines... great excuse for a beer tho Paul, best I have heard of yet!!!