You know its time to diet when...

[Sniper]

You dance and it makes the band skip.

You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus,
and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live.

You put mayonnaise on an aspirin.

You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts.

Your driver's license says, "Picture continued on other side."

You ran away and they had to use all four sides of the milk
carton for your picture.

You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth.

You could sell shade.

Your blood type is Ragu.

You need an appointment to attend an ' open house'.

[Colapop]

You feeling a little self consious today Snipey?

[Sniper]

How did you know.... I have put on a few pounds in prep for winter.

[Edbear]

And you hop on the talking scales and they say, "One at a time, please!"