Internet Dating

**MadDuck** · 1st June 2006, 22:51

Originally Posted by fozz rock

WHAT! you can find woman on the net

Thanks to Scorpy for caring. My piss take was about all the BS you find on dating sites. I gone past the I give a shit stage cos i got my heart ripped and and stamped on the ground....to lets have a laugh.

Weasel if you got that fat guys number let me know

**Karma** · 1st June 2006, 22:52

yeh...

0800 WEASEL

**MadDuck** · 1st June 2006, 22:54

is there a reason 0800 ferret gets the same answer

**Karma** · 1st June 2006, 22:58

yeh I've got loads..

0800 bigboy
0800 donkeydick

you name it...

**MadDuck** · 1st June 2006, 23:14

I have a real issue with calling any of those numbers because I will be disappointed.

Best you register with telecom the following:

0800 dreamer
0800 i wish
0800 i think i can ride a bike
0800 full of shit

**Jantar** · 1st June 2006, 23:14

I think I'm starting to get the hang of this internet dating lingo. So if I want to advertise myself I'd have to say:

Age: 23....actually means 53, still have all my hair, and not yet grey.
Very Tall: I am the average guy
Fair: Actually so white you don't want to see me naked.
Almost Handsome: Well my mum once claimed to love me.
Almost Married: The wife knows I am here, but pretends not to.
Rides a motorbike: Provided the temperature is over -6.
Like Camping: I can afford a decent hotel but prefer a tent.
Cant stand Kids: I have 3 of my own but thank god they are over 20.
Hunting: Have to to get rid of the huge amount of fat I carry
Im ready for love: I'm married. Need I say more?
Sense of Humour: My jokes are so damn bad even I don't find them funny.
Financially secure: I own more of my house than the bank does.
Sports Minded: Like to watch the Silver Ferns and any female tennis match
No expectations: I don't expect anyone to reply.
I dont have a picture: I can't get anyone to take a decent photo.
I scrub up well: Sure do, every month whether I need to or not.

Anyone interested? Contact Mrs J and be prepared to fight. I'll deny everything.

**Kornholio** · 1st June 2006, 23:31

Hmmm, well I found the ones that dont put their weight into their profile are fatties and the ones with no profile pic but maybe of a unicorn or a fairy are fuglies...and the ones with only top half of body in pic, they have big ass...mucho junk in trunk :/

**MadDuck** · 1st June 2006, 23:39

Originally Posted by Jantar

I think I'm starting to get the hang of this internet dating lingo. So if I want to advertise myself I'd have to say:

Age: 23....actually means 53, still have all my hair, and not yet grey.
Very Tall: I am the average guy
Fair: Actually so white you don't want to see me naked.
Almost Handsome: Well my mum once claimed to love me.
Almost Married: The wife knows I am here, but pretends not to.
Rides a motorbike: Provided the temperature is over -6.
Like Camping: I can afford a decent hotel but prefer a tent.
Cant stand Kids: I have 3 of my own but thank god they are over 20.
Hunting: Have to to get rid of the huge amount of fat I carry
Im ready for love: I'm married. Need I say more?
Sense of Humour: My jokes are so damn bad even I don't find them funny.
Financially secure: I own more of my house than the bank does.
Sports Minded: Like to watch the Silver Ferns and any female tennis match
No expectations: I don't expect anyone to reply.
I dont have a picture: I can't get anyone to take a decent photo.
I scrub up well: Sure do, every month whether I need to or not.

Anyone interested? Contact Mrs J and be prepared to fight. I'll deny everything.

Mrs J
Was almost sold until....silver ferns. Me I prefer rugby....hes all yours

**Mrs Busa Pete** · 2nd June 2006, 07:05

Originally Posted by Scorpygirl

OH OK, Gullible as usual me!!! "Scorpygirl hides again"

well iv'e never meet you yet Scorpygirl but i do look forward to meeting you one day because what i have read when you have put a thread in you have always been compasionate and careing and hears to another 10 years + with rino.

hay Madduck i meet pete at the gas station so you can meet them in some wherd and wonderfull places.

**ManDownUnder** · 2nd June 2006, 07:35

Originally Posted by fozz rock

WHAT! you can find woman on the net

It's easier to find 'em at the pub!

There's even a special room with "Women" written on the door - heaps of 'em in there in various stages of undress...

Doesn't every know this already though?

**PuppetMaster** · 2nd June 2006, 09:06

Originally Posted by ManDownUnder

It's easier to find 'em at the pub! There's even a special room with "Women" written on the door - heaps of 'em in there in various stages of undress...

Doesn't every know this already though?

MDU, you arent that peeping bloke that got caught in the ladies toilets in the BNZ centre in Wellington are you ?

**Hitcher** · 2nd June 2006, 09:14

The Interweb hadn't been invented when the then-yet-to-be Mrs H and I first met. So I had to resort to stalking. I guess that's inevitable when one partner isn't as immediately attracted as the other?

**PuppetMaster** · 2nd June 2006, 09:18

Looking for Super Model that owns a brewery and grows her own weed. Preferably with open minded twin sister.

**Paul in NZ** · 2nd June 2006, 09:53

Originally Posted by Hitcher

The Interweb hadn't been invented when the then-yet-to-be Mrs H and I first met. So I had to resort to stalking. I guess that's inevitable when one partner isn't as immediately attracted as the other?

I know how this goes... They were just testing us for chivilrous behaviour...

**PuppetMaster** · 2nd June 2006, 10:03

Originally Posted by Hitcher

The Interweb hadn't been invented when the then-yet-to-be Mrs H and I first met. So I had to resort to stalking. I guess that's inevitable when one partner isn't as immediately attracted as the other?

The olden days must have been tough. Are you saying that you had to talk to someone, face to face, in person ?
No email, no text, no chat ?