My son's best mate took his own life last night

[NC]

What drives someone to take thier life ?

The feeling that all the pain that you have suffered is never going to leave you, there is no out. No matter how you try and talk to people (who offer to listen) none of them understand. Depression is a killer.

[Rossi Gal]

Its the sadest thing to ever hear. so sorry. my thoughts are with you, your son, the family and all those involved. and to those who have also shared here.

[MattRSK]

Jared Clout was his name and yea he lived and worked in Palmerston North been here all his life, the only time he left was with us on holiday. He was right into his hockey and played for the rep team here
Thanks everyone for all you support, i am shocked to learn of so many people that have known someone close that has taken thier life and as Zapf said who wouldnt want to be a part of this awesome country ?

Yeah turns out me and a close mate of mine knew him quite well. Pretty cut up about this.

[Macktheknife]

RIP young man. Meanie, I hope and pray this will be the last time you and your family will be exposed to this. Give my condolensces to your son.

[98tls]

SAD...thoughts go out to your son and the family.RIP

[Meanie]

Yeah turns out me and a close mate of mine knew him quite well. Pretty cut up about this.

Ill post the funeral details when we know at this stage its on thursday

[MattRSK]

Thanks meanie. Think my mate will travel up from wellington. He played hockey with jared.

[Meanie]

Thanks meanie. Think my mate will travel up from wellington. He played hockey with jared.

Just heard that his send off is at 2.00pm on Friday
Christian family church in Matipo street Palmerston North
Ask your mate to let some of his hockey team mates know, his parents dont know how to get hold of them

[MattRSK]

Thanks meanie. My friend will try and get into contact with the hockey team. Im sure word will get round.

[The Pastor]

Sobering news. Often comes with no warning at all.
Its very sad when someone thinks they have no other option.

[magicfairy]

After I read this yesterday I went home and talked to my 19 yr old son about suicide. "...if you ever feel like that please come and talk to me...." He told me that someone he knew from school (Wlg) had committed suicide a couple of months ago, and he knew of others. We forget sometimes that for all their bravado they are still very young and vulnerable.
My heart goes out to the family, it must be devastating.

[Scorpygirl]

Meanie - this is such sad news to hear. Please keep the channels of communication wide open for your son and his friends at this time and for the next few months. Kia kaha, kia toa, kia manawanui at this time. Oh how I know the pain of losing someone to suicide but also knowing the depths of the abyss that envelops you in a complete darkness. Take care of your young people everyone.

[Quartida]

It is not until recently that I really realize how a simple "hey, how are you" when you meet someone in the morning at the workplace can really change your relationship with those involved.
It might not be much to look at, but it goes far deep.

Exceptionally well said, and very true. The smallest things can make the biggest difference.

[Meanie]

We laid Jared to rest yesterday, a very touching and emotional funeral.
I had to get up and say something and i dont mind saying i struggled with it but i got through
One of his close friends got up and sang Angel a song sung by Sarah McLachlan and i dont think thier was a dry eye in the whole church
His hockey team was there which was very cool indeed Thanks mattRSK for giving them the heads up
I think it was very sobering for all the younguns there I hope they all learn a lesson from Jareds mistake If it saves even one life Jared has made a difference
Thanks heaps to all of you for your support and kind words it does help when you are going through something like this to know you have friends that are so willing to help
Bye Jared we sure are going to miss you

[adaymond]

I'm Jared Clouts Aunt - Sister of his father Steve..

Jared didnt actually have a know history of depression, this was revealed to the entire family after his death by his doctor.
Jared had a promising future; his apprenticeship was going well; no "Girl troubles" no drug abuse etc; he done exceedingly well at sport and had heaps of supportive mates - some of them I can remember from when they were little tots running round Peter Hall drive, Palmy.

The last time I saw Jared is when he came to Wellington and stayed with me for a week or so a coupple of months before he suicided.

There was no clue as to why Jared suicided, he had promised his little sister Courtney that he was going to pick her up the next morning and take her to hockey, he had laid his own hockey uniform out on his bed.

The only thing anyone seems to know is that his mood changed when he was out with his mates (flatmates also) they left him at the bar that they were all in, noone knows anything else after that.
It seems he went home later that night and suicided - later to be found by his older sister and his father.

The most difficult thing for the family is; the simple fact that noone knows why, no note, no warning - no anything!
If someone out there knows anything, it would be awesome if they told Jareds parents - even an anonymous note in the mailbox would be great - to finally put their mind and hearts at ease