Wasted lives ?

[rfc85]

Young fella at work told me yesterday that his girlfriend is up the duff,he's stoked and looking forward to being a father---at 19yrs old--his girlfriend is 18.
He is unskilled and only has the job he has due to his girl being the boss's daughter.
He's a real nice bloke,but to commit to raiseing a child at that age to me seems fucken dumb,neither of them have"lived" to see what the big wide world has to offer and now they are tied down for 16 odd years.
I realise with the current system of handouts etc,they should survive,but what a way to waste your only crack at youth.
I never married till I was 27 and I had lived life to the max and was ready to settle down,in fact I changed my whole lifestyle to reflect that.
Your views ?

[Lou Girardin]

Marriage and kids when young was the norm not too long ago.
I can't understand the old farts starting families in their 50's.

[snuffles]

problem is, theyre in the I want generation, they dont know how to get it, but they think they desrve it.

Bullet proof to the extreme.........sad to see.

[ManDownUnder]

So kid will be grown and gone by the time he's 40 (ish) so he'll have a good life after that though...

and who says kids ruin your lives... although I'm personally inclined to agreed with what you're saying. It does seem very young to have that level of committment etc. Good luck to him though...

[Dooly]

Seems too young but I guess thats what they want.
No doubt they'll split in the future as they mature.

I got hitched at 33 finally, after doing everything I wanted to and enjoying life to the max, thats when I finally wanted to settle down.

Now I'm a boring old bastard.

[RantyDave]

My mum (of all people) had two takes on this. She reckoned you either had to have your kids really young, get 'em out the door and then get on with your life; or leave it as late as possible and do the living first.

Sounds to me like the young fella has it sorted, actually. If he's unskilled then it makes sense to be nailed down to a job while he gets his shit together, does the whole popping sprogs thing, then hopefully goes and lives a bit in his mid thirties. Even better that he's got bugger all chance of losing his job.

Dave

[Macktheknife]

On the other hand at least he is standing by his actions and prepared to do whatever it takes to make things work.
Too many people in his situation would have hit the ground running and kept going. Then you guys would have been bitching about his lack of responsibility, no thought of consequences, selfish etc...
It may be your opinion that this kid is doing the 'wrong thing' or is just young and stupid, but it might be exactly what his life's amibition is, it might be that together they decided to go for this and take the knocks together.
Don't be so quick to judge them.
Your way worked for you, it might be the worst thing in the world for them.

[The_Dover]

It's hardly the end of the world or his life is it?

Are you ever ready?

[James Deuce]

So kid will be grown and gone by the time he's 40 (ish) so he'll have a good life after that though...

Lol. I was going to say the same thing.

[Sniper]

Why is this in General biker raveings? And on topic, Im 21 and my fiance' is 20. When we plan to marry, I will be 25 and she 24, is that too young?

[ManDownUnder]

Why is this in General biker raveings? And on topic, Im 21 and my fiance' is 20. When we plan to marry, I will be 25 and she 24, is that too young?

Chronilogical, and emotional age are two very different things my friend.

Some are ready at 17... other are never ready. If you ask yourselves "why should we not get married", and you struggle to answer ... you're probably ok...

[snuffles]

Why is this in General biker raveings? And on topic, Im 21 and my fiance' is 20. When we plan to marry, I will be 25 and she 24, is that too young?

its not the age of marrige that matters, do you have kids? are you planning to have kids?

Its more about supporting offspring, it doesnt matter what age you start as long as you can support the poor bloody kids, and no the DPB is not supporting the kids.

[skelstar]

Hes happy and will arguably be developing emotionally at a faster rate than most of his peers I would say. With the right guidance he'll be sweet, as will his g/f and baby.

[Sniper]

its not the age of marrige that matters, do you have kids? are you planning to have kids?

Im bad with pets, so proberbly not

[Zukin]

Well it wasn't that long ago that we were in the same situation!

I was 18 and the girl was 16
Yep accidents happen, and yes she was pregnant.

It was hard to adjust but we stuck at it,
At the time I was an unemployed bum, smoked pot and then this, what on earth was I going to do!!
She was still at school and to make things worse she was kicked out of home.

For the first time in my life I had a reason to work, and to live!
So I applied for a job, and I guess my body language reflected that and I got that job
Then I gave up pot (within a few days of finding out she was pregnant), and we found a house to live in, but we had no money and very little in the way of furniture but we made do by getting a house in the country and working there to pay for the rent on the weekends and before work.
My income was $135 a week, and we didn't even know about Family Support for the first 4 years!!
We did that for about 2 years until we could afford to move to town.

That was 16 years ago, and that girl is now my wife and best friend and I would have it no other way.
We both have good careers (even though she had to leave school) and we still enjoy each other.
That baby is now a 16 year old girl and she gets on like a sister with her mum, they share clothes and makeup.
What makes me feel good about this and I dont mind sharing is that we are still together, we have never relied on others for handouts, and everything we have is our own, and best still we were not able to have anymore children (but boy do we have fun trying), so the one we have is blessed I guess!

So for me, it was a blessing in disguise.
Never judge a book by its cover, sometimes it does work.

Cheers