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Thread: ..the warehouse where everyone gets a bargain

  1. #1
    Join Date
    27th December 2005 - 00:03
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    ..the warehouse where everyone gets a bargain

    A very loud, unattractive, hard-faced woman walks into The Warehouse
    with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way
    through the entrance.

    The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to The Warehouse -
    nice children you've got there -- are they twins?"

    The fat ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl: "Of course
    they bloody arent! The oldest, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7.

    Why the hell would you think they're twins?..... Do you really think
    they look alike, ya dickead?"

    "Absolutely not," replies the greeter, "I just can't believe anyone
    would f*ck you twice!"
    Actions speak louder than words or good intentions

    He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. - Paul Keating

  2. #2
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    12th July 2003 - 01:10
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    Must remember that one next time I have to deal with a foul-mouthed slack-jawed mouthbreathing trackie-wearing smelly mother of two kids (to two different fathers) that's standing there with a rollie fag flapping off her bottom lip while screeching at me like a banshee...

    PCA her I come...
    Winding up drongos, foil hat wearers and over sensitive KBers for over 14,000 posts...........
    " Life is not a rehearsal, it's as happy or miserable as you want to make it"

  3. #3
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    29th September 2006 - 18:07
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    Very amusing Bee-Em :-))

    It reminds me slightly of the Irish woman who goes to see her doctor complaining of chest pains.

    "Ooh Doctor," she says' "I'm havin' dese terrible chest pains to be sure. I tink oi may have acute angina"

    "Well go behind the screen, strip down to the waist and lie on the bed for me. I'll be in to see you in a minute"

    Shortly, the doctor goes to examine her.

    "Hmm....so you tink you have acute angina do ya?"

    "Yes Doctor" she replies.

    "Well dat's a relief", he says, "cos you've got friggin' ugly tits!!"


    "...You're gonna have to face it, your dick needs a rub" Robert Palmer "Addicted to Love"

  4. #4
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    20th August 2006 - 11:29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bloody Mad Woman (BMW) View Post
    A very loud, unattractive, hard-faced woman walks into The Warehouse
    with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way
    through the entrance.

    The door greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to The Warehouse -
    nice children you've got there -- are they twins?"

    The fat ugly woman stops screaming long enough to snarl: "Of course
    they bloody arent! The oldest, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7.

    Why the hell would you think they're twins?..... Do you really think
    they look alike, ya dickead?"

    "Absolutely not," replies the greeter, "I just can't believe anyone
    would f*ck you twice!"
    Ohhhh I would love to be able to say that!!!!

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by scumdog View Post
    mouthbreathing trackie-wearing smelly
    Hahahahaha I like it...perfect description...
    "I'm gonna get to the bottom of this, and I dont give a fuck if you're at the top!!!"

  6. #6
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    25th May 2004 - 23:04
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    Sniper must be busy - repost! But the original version had K Mart or similar in it...
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  7. #7
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    7th November 2004 - 11:00
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
    Sniper must be busy - repost! But the original version had K Mart or similar in it...
    Right you are Mrs Beemer

    http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/sh...ighlight=twins
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  8. #8
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    25th May 2004 - 23:04
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    Glad to be of service, sorry I was too lazy to hunt down the thread!
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    7th November 2004 - 11:00
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
    Glad to be of service, sorry I was too lazy to hunt down the thread!
    No problems. I was bored, usually I cant be bothered
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

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