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Thread: Demonic dunny warning

  1. #1
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    26th January 2006 - 18:14
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    Demonic dunny warning

    For fuckssakes this could only happen to me. Really. I'm not kidding. This shit doesn't happen to anybody else. Ever.

    I went to our local shopping centre to have a curry for lunch today, and nature called. I wandered down the corridor to the toilets, and the first one I came across was one of those cubicles that requires a button to be pressed for the door to open. I walked in, waited for the door to close, pressed the red locking button, and proceeded to go my business. After a little while, there was a click and the door opened up to reveal a shocked lady and child standing there, agog, looking at me, who happened to be in a rather compromised position right at that moment. Embarrassed, we all were, the mother and child walked away quickly, and I was left waiting the ten seconds to an eternity for the automatic door to close, as more people passed, peering into my cubicle of terror.

    After the required expletives were uttered I pressed the locking button again before returning to the toilet to finished what I started. I mean, I was halfway through my business, and I really wasn't prepared to shuffle down the corridor to find another dunny.

    Well, fuck me if the exact same thing didn't happen again twenty seconds later!

    The result is two embarrassed ladies (to mitigate my own embarrassment I can only hope that they were quietly impressed - it must have been very quietly though), two small children most likely mentally and emotionally scarred for life who will grow up to be mass murderers or rapists, and a slightly soiled pair of underpants.

    I called centre management to inform them of their problem and that as a result I had exposed myself to several of their customers, and also asked that they pass on my apologies should any ladies complain about the dirty depraved skinhead biker who was waving his wanger at them and their trembling kids.

    I was offered an apology, an assurance they would fix it, and a coffee voucher.

    Coffee?!?!?! Like I ever want to have to visit their demonic fucking toilets again!

  2. #2
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    15th June 2006 - 13:39
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    Thats some funny shit (pun intended)
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  3. #3
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    I'd insist on a sausage to go with the coffee mate LMAO

    Oh no - seriously - that happened?? That's shoking. Ring the news and let them know. They'll get a kick out of it and you'll end up with more than a coffee voucher...
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by ManDownUnder View Post
    I'd insist on a sausage to go with the coffee mate LMAO

    Oh no - seriously - that happened?? That's shoking. Ring the news and let them know. They'll get a kick out of it and you'll end up with more than a coffee voucher...
    LOL, nah, bugger that. I'd rather something else for my fifteen minutes of fame!

  5. #5
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    Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahaha(snork)hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (pfffffffft)ahahahahahahahahahahah.

    I'm sorry.

    Hahahahahahaha (something just broke).


    If a man is alone in the woods and there isn't a woke Hollywood around to call him racist, is he still white?



  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim2 View Post
    Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahaha(snork)hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (pfffffffft)ahahahahahahahahahahah.

    I'm sorry.

    Hahahahahahaha (something just broke).
    Yeah. What he said.
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  7. #7
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    Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    *tears in my eyes IRL*
    .

  8. #8
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    16th February 2005 - 14:35
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    Thanks, made my day that did..........

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shadmeister View Post

    the dirty depraved skinhead biker who was waving his wanger at them and their trembling kids.
    OMG! What sort of 'Nature Call' has one waving the wanger about?





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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim2 View Post
    [LEFT]Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahaha(snork)hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (pfffffffft)ahahahahahahahahahahah.
    ]
    What he said.

    Actually, nearly had that happen to me in a servo in Napier, fortunatly was just zipping up when mother and child opened door - dont know who got the biggest surprise - bloody sure that door was locked!
    Experience......something you get just after you needed it

  11. #11
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    Thanks for sharing that - still laughing - did the loos play music - the ones in Dannevirke do - they allow you 10 minutes in there!!
    Actions speak louder than words or good intentions

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  12. #12
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    1st August 2006 - 12:23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim2 View Post
    Bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahaha(snork)hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (pfffffffft)ahahahahahahahahahahah.

    I'm sorry.

    Hahahahahahaha (something just broke).


    Yeah, definitely what he said!

    Sorry for your pain and all but maaaan, that's funny reading!
    Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way

  13. #13
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    Yup,thats funny
    Keep us posted on anymore embarassing stuff that happens to you
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  14. #14
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    18th October 2005 - 16:47
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    Bahahaha nice one mate, I dont know the toilets your talking about though?

    I'll take the coffee voucher if you want
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  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by sels1 View Post
    What he said.

    Actually, nearly had that happen to me in a servo in Napier, fortunatly was just zipping up when mother and child opened door - dont know who got the biggest surprise - bloody sure that door was locked!
    could've been surprisingly painful had that zipping procedure gone wrong in the shock of the moment...

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