Depression...

[Badger8]

It's also a pretty handy excuse to get out of visiting the family next xmas. "Sorry but I've got more important shit to do like help people in need... you know... the real xmas spirit" ... That should keep them quiet

Not sure how old you are but I found my depression slowly eased once I got past 23. Took plenty of work but that was when I started getting traction. I'm sure that was partially an age related change in my brain chemistry that helped.

Unfortunately depression had fucked my life up pretty damn good by then and it's taken a shit load of work to get back on track. You'd have no idea I was the same person if you met me then vs now.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that even if inside you're not feeling great but are managing to keep your life on track you should try and hold onto that for when you get the inside to match the outside.

Much as it doesn't feel like there is any hope there is a strong chance you'll pop out the other side stronger and a better person for it.

Yeah, i only really started making headway around 21. Got to the point in my life where i was mature enough to stop holding grudges, and truly forgive, and move past a lot of the shit in my life that was holding me back. Came to accept the fact that yeah, some pretty horrific shit has happened to me, but every single thing has made me who i am today. gotta leave the past where it is, learn from it, and move forward. Easier said than done most of the time, but i'm making progress.

Some days it's easy, some days it's a fight, but i'm keepin on plugging for now, hoping that the insides will match the outsides before too long.

[discotex]

Some days it's easy, some days it's a fight, but i'm keepin on plugging for now, hoping that the insides will match the outsides before too long.

Know exactly what you mean mate. Riding has certainly helped me. It gives me such a buzz every time I get on my bike. Keep on keepin on eh

[fireball]

when you have had enough what do you do?
feel like shit today the worst my depression has been in a long time.

[Steam]

when you have had enough what do you do?
feel like shit today the worst my depression has been in a long time.

When everything else fails, I go to bed. Just being in bed, in the dark, makes me feel slightly better. Don't have to deal with anything or anyone. Even if it's the middle of the day.

[fireball]

When everything else fails, I go to bed. Just being in bed, in the dark, makes me feel slightly better. Don't have to deal with anything or anyone. Even if it's the middle of the day.

there lies problem number 2.... i havent slept for 2 days at least, cant sleep couldnt eat today, had to take 2 sleeping pills last night and a half hour cold shower just to be able to get 3 hours sleep.... and im running out of sleeping pills only 3 left.

[Badger8]

when you have had enough what do you do?
feel like shit today the worst my depression has been in a long time.

I find it's each to their own when it comes to this. You need to try a few things, find what works for you, and stick with it.

Personally, i either hide in my shell and ignore the world (generally doesn't make things better, ut is a nice break from the world that is making me feel so bad), or find someone to be around that understands i'm having a shitty day, and that i just need to be around someone and talk rubbish. Find someone who understands that i dont want to talk about 'it', i just wanna hang out and feel 'normal' again

[Steam]

... i havent slept for 2 days at least, cant sleep ...

Oh dear! Sleep was always my friend.
I have no experience with anything like that so I have nothing else to say but Good Luck!
Thinking of you.

[Badger8]

there lies problem number 2.... i havent slept for 2 days at least, cant sleep couldnt eat today, had to take 2 sleeping pills last night and a half hour cold shower just to be able to get 3 hours sleep.... and im running out of sleeping pills only 3 left.

oh dear... been there, and it blows.
i have enough trouble sleeping at the best of times, damn insomnia. if you really cant sleep, and you know when you're lying there that it aint gonna happen, try doing something productive. Nothing worse thanlying there trying to get to sleep, thinking "Sleep you sod, sleep!" Just make sure it's something you can drop at a moment's notice if you feel the tired's coming on and jump into bed.
Dont make my mistake of cleaning your room, then finding yourself falling asleep standing up coz you covered your bed in crap!

Thoughts are with ya hope you get some well deserved rest soon

[Kittyhawk]

You guys know where I live...just call in when ever...even if ya's just want to go for a ride and end up somewhere....and dont worry bout what time of the day or night it is

[fireball]

im just over feeling like shit

im one of the kind of people you dont know have depression but its there every day i cant escape it any more

[necrolyte]

I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside.

That is a quote from a movie that perfectly sums up how i feel about life in general, but i have found what my triggers are and what i can do to shake it off. I have medication that i'm supposed to take daily but just ends up being whenever i remember.

Personally i find that just doing anything that requires concentration (and is enjoyable) seems to help alot. I like to talk to people about absolute shit to take my mind off it, or work on my bike or car.

This is what helps me, probably different for you.
Peace out.

[Ocean1]

there lies problem number 2.... i havent slept for 2 days at least, cant sleep couldnt eat today, had to take 2 sleeping pills last night and a half hour cold shower just to be able to get 3 hours sleep.... and im running out of sleeping pills only 3 left.

Lack of sleep can mess me up no end.

And it's definitely that way around, trouble sleeping for a couple of days then feel like crap.

Tried Yoga?

[fireball]

Lack of sleep can mess me up no end.

And it's definitely that way around, trouble sleeping for a couple of days then feel like crap.

Tried Yoga?

tried working myself to point of exhaustion today i think and hope it has worked

[DarkHeart]

Hi there one and all. I hope this msg finds u all safe and well. Hope u all had a good Xmas and New Years. Mine was rather quiet and uneventful...... Personaly these days i hate the festive time of year because it just ain't festive for me anymore. The only real reason i participate in it anymore is for my daughter any my neice's and nephew.. But on a lighter note i've not had many "episodes of darkness" recently. Which i am madly greatful for.....a few anxiety attacks which had the potential to tear me apart from the inside out...but i managed to see them coming and set myself on the way to avoiding them. Thankfully it worked for the most part. I have recently told a couple of my closest friends about what eats me up....and they have been greatly supportive and understanding. There are some...as usual... that just don't get it and or care to try to get it. But they can just sod off!! Anyway enough of that for now...... Hope everyone has a great start to the new year. Take care all and peace out.

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

Progress not perfection
I went to a place last week and visited some friends - over the last 8-10 years they have seen what I have been thru. I received a compliment from an older wiser guy who simply said "My goodness you have changed - you have come thru so much and it is amazing to see and hear where you are at now".

I am grateful that my medication is all sorted and is working. Without it the whole chemical imbalance will come back. I've proved that often enough.
I cannot and will not get complacent about depression. It can strike at any time and sometimes for no reason at all. It is so good to be out of the big black hole at present.