What kind of fucktards work for banks these days?

[LilSel]

Get an ASB Mastercard Credit Card with True Reward Points. Use that instead of your Eftpos card and you'll find you might be onto a little money earner. Don't forget to set up direct debt to pay your credit card balance every month and you're set.

I already have an ASB mastercard credit card with true reward points.
I only just put a pin number on it last week tho... so been using eftpos card mainly. Have direct debt set up to pay it automatically each month.

When my credit card expired... they sent me a new one... but cuz it was a new card.. I had to go into the bank to put pin back on it... (not easy with work, cuz the banks are closed when I finish, and not open when I start... however I squeezed it in... and now have pin lol)

I just have to remember when I get paid (monthly.. only 12 times a year!!)... to transfer money onto it etc...

[Jimmy B]

Banks want to sell you umbrellas when the sun's out, but want them back when it's raining.

Haha hence the term "fair weather bankers"

I work for a Bank and normally assume the position for a good kicking when I the inevitable question of occupation arises while standing around the BBQ having a few beers. We call this the "BBQ test"

When I joined the Bank we seemingly had tonnes of staff and most processes were manual and generally conducted locally, things were not perfect but we had people with vast experience who had the discretion to make decisions.

The amount of change that I have seen in the past 10 years makes my eyes water. Thankfully I’ve been plucked off the deck of the Titanic more times than I care to remember but I fear this change has come at some cost. As an example, my business unit had ~100 staff 7 years ago, now there are 14 and volumes have increased significantly, as have risks.

Where we seem to be at the moment is pockets of expertise and specialisation that offer a deeper and more sophisticated range of solutions than have ever been available. Unfortunately most people will not come into contact with these areas as they are reserved for the top tier of customer, think Fonterra et al

IMHO The remainder would seem to be cost driven so the back office is generally a factory type structure with a discretionless front end, ticking boxes to pass to the factory. I guess this is borne out of competitive pressure and the drive for increased profitability. Between these 2 pressures lie the service proposition, and its one area that is a difficult line to walk. Banks take this very seriously, constantly seeking feedback and making changes but we effectively have a highly regulated monster of a business and change tends to be conservative, expensive and slow.

Finance is a deeply personal thing, what is right for one is entirely inappropriate for others and when it goes wrong, by its very nature people get justifiably bent out of shape, I think this can be attributed to structure and communication i.e. the Business is not necessarily setup to accommodate everyone and when it goes wrong who do I talk to. I guess Banks get away with this because of customer apathy and a largely captive market. By this I mean either apathy through perceived switching cost and captive once every Bank in Town had pissed you off who do you turn to?

My advice:

Once you find someone in your Bank or a Bank that you are happy with then stick with it but be prepared to change if that person or Bank policy moves on.

Be a ratewhore, employ brokers, they cost nothing. See what’s on offer and go with it. This could potentially save you heaps.

If you are not happy, keep escalating the issue – every one in this business has a boss. It could be that your issue is easily resolved yet you have not struck people within the Bank that have the right skill set to help.

Do as much of your personal banking as you can by yourself. Use the internet type products eg changing address, APs funds transfer etc, it will cut down on bank error and improve turnaround time.

Anyway Dover asked what sort…well for the most part they are as honest and reliable as we can get ranging through to highly qualified specialist staff, so basically all sorts.

We all have horror stories Dude and I am sorry but don’t rate a simple change of address as being a material life changing event. True horror stories are. Get the internet and sort it by yourself, don’t wait for a monkey to send a form, then get on the web bleating when it doesn’t happen. And by the way, when you call someone “boy” it is roughly equivalent to slagging the wait staff just prior to sending your meal back at a restaurant because you spuds are cold. You may feel justified but I wouldn’t recommend eating it when it came back…..

[Karma]

I work for a Bank and normally assume the position for a good kicking when I the inevitable question of occupation arises while standing around the BBQ having a few beers. We call this the "BBQ test"

Mate, you got it easy, I'm not even gonna say where I work, but those that know, pity me.

[The_Dover]

Get the internet and sort it by yourself, don’t wait for a monkey to send a form, then get on the web bleating when it doesn’t happen. And by the way, when you call someone “boy” it is roughly equivalent to slagging the wait staff just prior to sending your meal back at a restaurant because you spuds are cold. You may feel justified but I wouldn’t recommend eating it when it came back…..

NATIONAL BANK don't have a sophisticated enough system to allow me to change the address online.

I never said it was a horror story dickhead it's just an example of incompetence and shit customer service.

The fact is I sent a terse email bitching about my change of address being fucked up and got attitude back from a "customer services" person who is clearly illiterate.

I have plenty of customer service experience and when you fuck up, you kiss arse. If you want to keep customers.

I have met one good cunt that works for National, the rest have been absolutely fucking useless, lacking in personality, rude and with the worst "customer service" skills I have ever experienced.

You're correct when you say that all the changes in the banking industry are profit driven. Disgusting profits for providing a fucking rip off and downright insulting service to everyday people whilst lining the pockets of fat cats and investors. The joys of a captive market.

I'm beginning to sound like a fucking socialist, somebody shoot me.

[Disco Dan]

Mate, you got it easy, I'm not even gonna say where I work, but those that know, pity me.

Haha! All is saw was: "what kind of fucktards..." then your name underneath it...

[Disco Dan]

somebody shoot me.

[The_Dover]

as you struggle to shoot your load I don't think I'd be too worried if you had a gun in your hand.

[Jimmy B]

NATIONAL BANK don't have a sophisticated enough system to allow me to change the address online.

I never said it was a horror story dickhead

I have plenty of customer service experience and when you fuck up, you kiss arse. If you want to keep customers.

Correct, Thats not too flash, You must be able to download it? hope you got it sorted now.

haha "dickhead" thats why I prefer people to judge me before they know me

True and just doesnt seem to be the case, lack of accountablity, lack of consequences...I can read the Headline "Share price tanks National lose the Dover portfolio"

[dawnrazor]

Its a gerneric insult relating closely to the insult " [insert name here] is/are gay."

Thats not what your saying at all, your saying "banks suck dick, hard" or "banks give a good blow job". You have made the assumption and mistake that everyone thinks banks are masculine in nature.

Attributing a sexulality to a corporation is a pointless exercise, attributing a personality to a corporation is a far more valid endeavour. And in a banks case, it is probably not unreasonable to suggest that banks are greedy, narcasistic, neurotic, psychopaths. Whether or not they give good head might be missing the point........

[The_Dover]

Correct, Thats not too flash, You must be able to download it? hope you got it sorted now.

haha "dickhead" thats why I prefer people to judge me before they know me

True and just doesnt seem to be the case, lack of accountablity, lack of consequences...I can read the Headline "Share price tanks National lose the Dover portfolio"

which bank do you work for?

I don't suppose losing my business will hurt National one bit, they probably lose more money down the back of the proverbial sofa each day than I'll ever make in a year, but they will get a surprise when I go in to close my accounts and leave them a "dirty protest" in the customer shithouse and then walk it through the bank on the bottom of my wellies.

[Jimmy B]

which bank do you work for?

I don't suppose losing my business will hurt National one bit, they probably lose more money down the back of the proverbial sofa each day than I'll ever make in a year, but they will get a surprise when I go in to close my accounts and leave them a "dirty protest" in the customer shithouse and then walk it through the bank on the bottom of my wellies.

Ill send you a PM but not National and more involved with Export than consumer finance.

Yep a "top loader" will sort them. Interestingly I recount the disgruntled client that put a fish in safe custody. By law the bank was unable to remove it. Fair to say he made his point

[silverado]

I have met one good cunt that works for National, the rest have been absolutely fucking useless, lacking in personality, rude and with the worst "customer service" skills I have ever experienced.

I have never met you Dover.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/search/sto...3A83027AF10111

[The Pastor]

Thats not what your saying at all, your saying "banks suck dick, hard" or "banks give a good blow job". You have made the assumption and mistake that everyone thinks banks are masculine in nature.

Attributing a sexulality to a corporation is a pointless exercise, attributing a personality to a corporation is a far more valid endeavour. And in a banks case, it is probably not unreasonable to suggest that banks are greedy, narcasistic, neurotic, psychopaths. Whether or not they give good head might be missing the point........

Sounds like you suck penis hard.

[Beemer]

I was with the National Bank years ago and found them on the whole to be pretty poor. I was trying to arrange a small personal loan once and had made an appointment with one of their staff to sign the documents. I get there at the appointed time and she wasn't there. She was at lunch! I had made the appointment at the bank and they had walked over and checked the time with her while I was there. It didn't get much better over the next few years so when I was left a large amount of money, I took great delight in walking in, paying off my loan and credit card and closing all my accounts. I'm with the Bank of NZ now and while they are not perfect, we do have two people in our local branch that we are more than happy to deal with. They do seem to give a damn and they have been pretty good to us over the years. Whenever I've had to do anything online or had to call the call centre, the staff have been pleasant to deal with and I've not had any problems either.

It does pay to shop around for a bank though - as Jimmy B says, no one bank suits everyone.

[Swoop]

National bank. The bank for you IF you want to do your banking between 9.30am and 3.30pm MINUS 1-2pm for lunch hour.

A total bunch of useless cunts who target the farming community.....