A disgusting toddler thread

[jrandom]

I think it's time for potty training.

Claire (Baby Random #1, 2 years and 3 months) wanders out into the kitchen this morning with bare nether regions, "Daddy! Daddy!" waving a clean nappy from the 'XL Girls' Huggies pack. Inspect toddlerly bum, clean as whistle, check down hall, no puddles on carpet, oh well. Pat on head, put new nappy on for her, she disappears into bedroom and reappears with trousers on (the right way round, even).

Think no more of it until Sarah calls me later to advise that she has found a neatly rolled up, poopy, used nappy on the corner of Claire's dresser drawers, accompanied by a ball of (used) nappy wipes with quantities of poop in evidence therein.

I just wish I'd thought to ask whether she'd folded or scrunched.

[FROSTY:Me]

ROTFLMAO--Ahh the joys of bein a daddy.
New parent mistake 101 --NEVER lift your under 3 year old up over your head with no nappy on. They seem to have perfect timing with the pooing and peeing.

[greenhorn]

I know your pain jrandom

Parenting rule #46
When out and about, your childs need to relieve him/her self is in direct proportion to the distance from the nearest toilet.

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Its a long way to the shop if you wanna sausage roll

[MikeL]

Some things are better left unsaid. Some memories are best left undisturbed, buried deep in the blur of early parenthood. You reminded me of one particularly nasty episode involving an explosive evacuation and a Plunket nurse who had just called in "to check up on baby's progress even though I'm off duty and heading out to dinner in my new dress". Well, I think she eventually made it to dinner, but not in that dress...

And then there was number 2 son, whose very first act, moments after delivery, was to pee copiously all over the doctor.

And then...

Enough already.

[Motu]

I found the advantages of sidecars one night - my daughter did one of those explosive go everywhere Karitane type things all over my wife in the enclosed chair - one time I didn't mind being out in the wet and cold,couldn't hear a thing and didn't look left all the way home.

[greenhorn]

Nothing brings about more solidarity between human beings than parents relating poo stories.

[toads]

I think it's time for potty training.

Claire (Baby Random #1, 2 years and 3 months) wanders out into the kitchen this morning with bare nether regions, "Daddy! Daddy!" waving a clean nappy from the 'XL Girls' Huggies pack. Inspect toddlerly bum, clean as whistle, check down hall, no puddles on carpet, oh well. Pat on head, put new nappy on for her, she disappears into bedroom and reappears with trousers on (the right way round, even).

Think no more of it until Sarah calls me later to advise that she has found a neatly rolled up, poopy, used nappy on the corner of Claire's dresser drawers, accompanied by a ball of (used) nappy wipes with quantities of poop in evidence therein.

I just wish I'd thought to ask whether she'd folded or scrunched.

sounds like a dream toddler, mine just dumped and spread!, nevermind cleaning up, that was always my privilege, as a matter of fact they have continued this trend metaphorically speaking into adulthood yarrggg

[FROSTY:Me]

Now were on the subject---wanna relate some food stories.
Best so far was a "lost " lunchbox-Lost because dad insisted that he finish eating what was in it before he could have a bickie.
Found in the bottom of his (coious) toy box a month or so later--ewwwww

[Ms Piggy]

I'm not a parent but I do recall seeing a Dad helping his son, who was obviously a bit too busting to make it to the loo, have a quick pee on the side of the busy main street, a bit embaressing but obviously necessary. HOWEVER, the next work eminating from Da are "Noooooooooooooo!!" As the little chap decides to do #2's too!

[KATWYN]

You guys talk about it like its so funny. I think
its actually really gross and not funny at all.
as MikeL said - some things are better left unsaid.

I think its bad enough owning a dog.

[jrandom]

You guys talk about it like its so funny.

I think you hit the nail on the head with the 'guy' part. Most of my male friends find poo stories hilarious. Girlies just shudder, turn green and swear never to get pregnant (again).

I think it's a side effect of that same marvellous personal quality, ie, being unaffected by proximity to vile smelly noisy things, that makes us naturals for things like baby-excretion wiping-up duties, Harley Davidson servicing, etc.

What would the Tender Gender do without us, eh?

[KATWYN]

I think you hit the nail on the head with the 'guy' part. Most of my male friends find poo stories hilarious. :

Blimmin toilet humour. I can never understand it. Like, my hubby finds
that diarrhea part on the movie "Dumb and Dumber" absolutely
hilarious - and I feel like chucking everytime

JR, I was at my mates place once (st) and her kid came out to give me a *present*and put it right in my face.....it was a great big soup ladel full of his...well you know (#2) nicely packed down for visual presentation.....kids mum was horrified... not as much as me though at the time!

[toads]

Blimmin toilet humour. I can never understand it. Like, my hubby finds
that diarrhea part on the movie "Dumb and Dumber" absolutely
hilarious - and I feel like chucking everytime

JR, I was at my mates place once (st) and her kid came out to give me a *present*and put it right in my face.....it was a great big soup ladel full of his...well you know (#2) nicely packed down for visual presentation.....kids mum was horrified... not as much as me though at the time!

omg!, that has to be the worst poo story ever!!, I've had 6 kids and seen plenty, but never anything that gross!

[Gixxer 4 ever]

I think it's time for potty training.


Think no more of it until Sarah calls me later to advise that she has found a neatly rolled up, poopy, used nappy on the corner of Claire's dresser drawers, accompanied by a ball of (used) nappy wipes with quantities of poop in evidence therein.

.

Dam. Hope we do not have to endure any more of this crap on KB. I know it is not OT but really, please. I note you have not replied ZED. :spudwave: This stuff belongs in a "Sheila" only area as men should not have to know about this type of stuff. No new age wanker man here and the world would be a better place if more men would stand up and say no.................

[KATWYN]

omg!, that has to be the worst poo story ever!!, I've had 6 kids and seen plenty, but never anything that gross!

So thats probably why i'm now 35 years old and have got NO kids!

BTW Toads, 6 kids and you ride a bike now as well, literally fitting all lifes
wonders into one life time -good on you