Sex Facts

**placidfemme** · 6th March 2007, 08:06

Rough Sex Facts...I didn't want to risk not posting it!!

Giving .........head....... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth

The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better than mouth wash, so suck a dick and save a smile.

Having nice sex burns 358 calories.

Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories.

Take off her clothes
with her consent.........................12 cal
without......................187 cal

Take off her Bra
With two hands..........................8 cal
With one hand.........................12 cal
With mouth.............................85 cal

Put on Protection
hard .......................... 6 cal
soft..........................315 cal

Foreplay
Looking for target...................8 cal
Finding G spot ......................92 cal
I don't F***ing care.....................0 cal

Entry
Holding her..................12 cal
On the floor.................8 cal

With Different Position
Missionary..........................358 cal
Doggy...........................316 cal
69 lying...............................286 cal
69 standing.............................512 cal
Italian hanger.........................912 cal

######
Real................................112 cal
Faking................................315 cal

After "O"
Lying in Bed............................18 cal
Hop off the bed............................36 cal
Wondering why she left pissed off...........816 cal

Get dressed
Quiet and calm...........................32 cal
Rushing.........................98 cal
Heard her boyfriend opening the door.............1218 cal
Heard her dad at the door.............1942 cal
Her mom walking in..............................Priceless!!!LOL

**bugjuice** · 6th March 2007, 08:14

lol.. orsum..
I'm aiming to be stick thin before the end of summer..

**Colapop** · 6th March 2007, 08:36

yOU ALREADY ARE BUGGY - GET YOUR HAND OFF IT!

**bugjuice** · 6th March 2007, 08:36

nah, still got a wee bit to go

**Paul in NZ** · 6th March 2007, 08:44

Originally Posted by bugjuice

lol.. orsum..
I'm aiming to be stick thin before the end of summer..

yeah - AIDs will do that...

**unhingedlizard** · 6th March 2007, 09:14

Reminds me. I need to buy more pineapple juice.

**Macktheknife** · 6th March 2007, 10:05

I know I am expressing my ignorance here but, what exactly is an Italian Hanger?????

**Disco Dan** · 6th March 2007, 10:14

Originally Posted by Macktheknife

I know I am expressing my ignorance here but, what exactly is an Italian Hanger?????

Need i say anymore?

"Sex Instructor - First lesson FREE"

**ManDownUnder** · 6th March 2007, 12:44

Originally Posted by Disco Dan

Need i say anymore?

"Sex Instructor - First lesson FREE"

err yes... I'm guessing it's one of the pics... y'know - the ones without labels...?

**Disco Dan** · 6th March 2007, 12:46

Originally Posted by ManDownUnder

err yes... I'm guessing it's one of the pics... y'know - the ones without labels...?

you wanna know my bank pin number too? lol

...yeah maybe

nothing comes for free

PM me for first lesson folks

bwahahahaha!

**WRT** · 6th March 2007, 12:51

Originally Posted by Disco Dan

you wanna know my bank pin number too? lol

...yeah maybe

nothing comes for free

PM me for first lesson folks

bwahahahaha!

You might want to specify if you are teaching men or women. If its men - dude, that's just gross. If it's women - then what exactly do you know about "being the woman"? Second thoughts, please dont share that with the class.

**ManDownUnder** · 6th March 2007, 12:55

Originally Posted by Disco Dan

nothing comes for free

LOL - but some of us are cheaper than others... n'est pas?

**TerminalAddict** · 6th March 2007, 12:59

ripped off from another site:

There is an e-mail going around the internet that says that of all the sex positions the Italian Chandelier (AKA Italian Hanger) burns the most calories. Here is a 'supposed' list of the positions and how many calories they burn:

Positions
Missionary 12 Calories
69 lying down 78 Calories
69 standing up 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow 216 Calories
Doggy Style 326 Calories
Italian Chandelier 912 Calories

This must be a list for women only because missionary only burns 12 calories. Anyway, in this position the female definitely is a busy person. She lies on her partner (facing upward) and arches her back to allow penetration. Then she has to do a crab-like back-bendy motion to get the motion going.

I don't know if you will really burn 912 calories but young Italian women always look great on TV despite the fact that they eat a lot of sausage (salcissa).