Unlawful violation

[ManDownUnder]

Well it’s amazin aint it… We all hate rapists… and lets face it, of all the crimes it’s right up there at the top of things to hate.

Succinct but oh so true! Blingo!

[Goblin]

Thanks... I wish myself luck too. I have some friends whose kids were molested by a friend of the family... that's kinda sharpened my senses when it comes to the "prove it" side of things...

I'll be letting them know lies will not be tolerated, but they have my full support in the pursuit of the truth, and the ride to the cop shop the register the complaint. That's a bit too simple and bolshy, but you know what I mean

My Brother moved to UK and married a Pommy lass and they have 2 daughters. She wasn't happy that he couldnt maintain her lifestyle of holidays in the Mediterranean, midweek spa's etc. so she accused him of molesting their daughter. He lost his job, his house, his family, his dignity and nearly his life yet she never even pressed charges or went to police. He now lives in a dingy flat and gets unsupervised visits with his girls. Now if there was any truth to her accusations, why would she send her daughters off to spend weekends with a child molester. She is a prime example of a gutless wonder who uses men to her advantage then tosses them away like rubbish. It breaks my heart and I want my bro to come home but he wont leave his girls behind and his bitchface wife would never consider leaving her mummy and daddy to give the girls a far better lifestyle over here. Her way out is to accuse him of molestation.

RantyDave, it was you who brought up rickards case in this thread in the first place...I was just asking. You appear to think it was the right decision...so be it!

[ManDownUnder]

As a thought - in my ameteruish experience it seems that hope is needed for the victims.

Is it/would it be possible for those able to offer the voice of experience to somehow confidentially speak to those needing it?

We have mentors for riding bikes... to show the pitfalls, and help people along the path to success. What about some proof there is hope, victims are not alone etc?
I'm happy to co-ordinate things if people are willing to trust me with that information, but I'd prefer a woman to head things up as I expect some reluctance to get a man involved (and understandibly so)

[Colapop]

Anyone that wants to talk should find somebody to talk to. Either the crisis centres (even if it is an anonymous call) or somebody/anybody you trust or think you can trust.

[avgas]

Have been in these shoes several years ago...a then soon-to-be X claimed I raped her at gun point but she didn't phone the Police,instead she told certain members of the community. Was farking hell living with that hanging over me even though she decided to change her story after I phoned the cops due to having serious concerns re being done for something I didn't do!!!
To this day some members of that particular community still think I did it...it disgusts me that it is so easy for a female to create such an evil situation for a male with NO evidence whatsoever!
As mentioned before....bitches like that make it harder for the genuine victims of this disgusting crime and I believe that the false complainants should be jailed...

Ha it must be a Tga thing aye - some of the girls down their are rather cunning.
I remember getting into so much shit with girls from tga. Its like they see an opportunity to lie or something

[candor]

My mates bro was falsely accused i same situation as dmtd. He hung himself in garage. She admitted it when Police went to tell her the news. She should have been charged or something

[Kittyhawk]

It's a shame there are some evil people in the world. But there are also genuine good people to.

[DMNTD:Me]

Ha it must be a Tga thing aye...

Nah was some farktard Northland honky muckhole....Karma is sorting her but doesn't help the victim,in this case me

My mates bro was falsely accused i same situation as dmtd. He hung himself in garage. She admitted it when Police went to tell her the news. She should have been charged or something

She should be made to join him IMO. Time for a reality check out there but hey,that's for a different thread I guess.

[Colapop]

That's right mate. While there are guys out there who are true victims, I have to ask how many guys are there that hide their crime by claiming to be a victim? Point first and direct the blame away from themselves...?

[ManDownUnder]

It's a shame there are some evil people in the world. But there are also genuine good people to.

Very true - mostly good I find, some not so good, and a few find their way to the ends of that spectrum.

[idleidolidyll]

Here's a perspective from a jurors POV:

Not long ago I served on a jury where a middle aged man was accused of molesting a girl aged 11 or 12 (not rape but 'touching').

The evidence came down to his word against hers. Even though there were 2 other adults and several other children present in the house when the offence(s) were alledgedly committed, no eye witnesses were offered.

The prosecution wanted the jury to prosecute based on emotion (the teary statements of the girl) and the defence wanted to defend based on evidence (or lack thereof).

In the end, the judge, when instructing the jury, told us that in NZ, people must be PROVEN guilty and do NOT need to prove their innocence. He also instructed us that we must be sure that the evidence presented was sufficient to prove guilt "beyond a reasonable doubt".

Given that the evidence was all her word against his, reasonable doubt DID exist and since no prior conviction was given as a perspective on the defendants personality, we had no option but to throw out the case because of lack of evidence. Every juror agreed that we did NOT know that the man was guilty or innocent but we DID know that there was not enough evidence to convict beyond a reasonable doubt.

[Colapop]

There are well publicised cases of false accusation and cases where the charges have not been proven. What seems to be conveniently forgotten are the victims. While there does have to be evidence to secure a conviction that does not mean a person hasn't been subjected to indecencies.

The point is here that victims should be heard. This is deemed a dirty issue - because it's too hard to deal with for a lot of people. Put yourself in the shoes of a victim, how the hell do they feel? Not for a few minutes or seconds, or for a contemplative theoretical exercise. They have to deal with it, inside them, at all times.

Granted there are false victims, but the scorn heaped on them also covers the ones who do need to be heard.

[ManDownUnder]

Granted there are false victims, but the scorn heaped on them also covers the ones who do need to be heard.

Mate - I think that's a key part of this... people are too quick to judge (or pre judge). She says this - he says that.

Let's go into this stuff with an open mind and establish actually what happened. No shame, only support - for BOTH sides. Let's face it - it's not going to be easy on anyone, no matter what the truth is.

... and then proceed on to find the truth, and deal with it accordingly.

Rape's a shit of a thing. I haven't been there - I don't know first hand, but I have seen how far and wide the pieces get scattered.

A simple song coming on the radio with lyrics that describe (or even hint at) intimacy can trigger horrific recollections of the past. Being spoken to by someone that reminds you of the perp, passing by the building where something happened, or a building that looks like it... being alone in the dark with a guy (walking home from the pub, in a movie theatre, in a car... etc) could all be triggers that make life hell - set the pulse racing, fire off the fight or flight response.

And who would ever know? Who else... would ever know? To the rest of us they're daily situations, quite normal, not threatening in any way, fun even. And yet someone that's been raped or otherwise threatened or violated is shitting themselves at every turn.

It's just not fair, and it's not acceptable.

Prejudging is a sure way to make sure people are not able to open up and start dealing with this MAJOR stress in their lives. Do not underestimate how major this is... it is right up there.

I note in the jokes section today there was a jopke posted which mentions sex and the various calories burned.... I don't recall the exact line but something like rough sex = 100 calories - having to hold her down = 600... or something like that.

Now to most of us with an open mind that's kinda funny if you're open to that, but walk in the shoes of someone that's been raped... and read it again. The joke become ugly and distasteful, and the person posting it comes under question in terms of their own morals... hell - it could be said they're siding with a rapist (sorry Placid - not picking on you. It's your joke but I'm just highlighting how viewpoints can be skewed).

Start with what you know... start with an open mind. Listen to what's gone on and the feelings and effects it has had on someone... support them. Like I say - both sides need support and understanding. The big question is "why".

Why was it reported?

rave off - sorry all.. this is a near and dear topic...

[candor]

I am confused by the red rep with the nice comment for an innocuos post I received this am. Can anyone explain?

[Colapop]

Rep has no substance. Red means I disagree with you. Green means I agree with you. Rep should either be scrapped altogether or made anonymous and without space for comment. Quite often people use it as a means of abuse.
Don't even give it a second thought - you've posted nothing that warrants any abuse of any at all in this thread.

Rep - you can't save it, spend it, use it. It doesn't make you a better person, less of a person, a king (or queen) among mortals or a pauper.

The worst thing about rep is you can't a new bike or bike bling with it!!