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Thread: Being a Kiwi...

  1. #1
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    Being a Kiwi...

    Being a Kiwi is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
    Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish
    kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.

    Only in N.Z. ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an
    ambulance.

    Only in N.Z. ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way
    to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people
    buy cigarettes at the front.

    Only in N.Z. ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries
    and a DIET coke.

    Only in N.Z. ... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens
    to the counters.

    Only in N.Z. ... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars on the
    drive and & lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

    Only in N.Z. ... do we use answering machines to screen calls and
    then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we
    didn't want to talk to in the first place.

    Only in N.Z. ... are there disabled parking places in front of a
    skating rink.

    NOT TO MENTION...
    3 Kiwis die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their
    tongue.

    38 Kiwis are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
    screwdrivers.

    31 Kiwis have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree
    while the fairy lights were plugged in.

    8 Kiwis had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
    cigarette in their mouth.

    A massive 543 Kiwis were admitted to emergency in the last two
    Years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

    and finally.....

    In 2000 eight Kiwis cracked their skull whilst throwing up in the
    toilet

  2. #2
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    21st December 2005 - 23:41
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    Quote Originally Posted by jetboy View Post
    Being a Kiwi is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
    Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish
    kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
    Being a kiwi is about riding a britten at twice the speed limit, drunk, to the cossi club for a gisborne gold then wheeling home via the servo for a maggot sack on the way, to park on a beer crate and watch moon tv while enjoying some nz green

    www.PhotoRecall.co.nz

  3. #3
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    Sounds robbed - Swedish furniture? Sounds like a reference to Ikea, which we don't get here...Other than that, uncannily observant...
    Just noticed, it's definately some sort of re-hash = NZ supermarkets don't have dispensaries (to issue rpescription drugs).

  4. #4
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    19th September 2006 - 22:02
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    And your point is


    Sounds like every other country too...

  5. #5
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    18th December 2004 - 08:09
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    Yeah saw this a while back about the US, figures were a little different but same basic thing.

    "If you can't laugh at yourself, you're just not paying attention!"
    "There is no limit to dumb."

    "Resolve to live with all your might while you do live, and as you shall wish you had done ten thousand years hence."

  6. #6
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    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Drunken Monkey View Post
    Sounds robbed - Swedish furniture? Sounds like a reference to Ikea, which we don't get here...Other than that, uncannily observant...
    Just noticed, it's definately some sort of re-hash = NZ supermarkets don't have dispensaries (to issue rpescription drugs).
    We don't have Ikea here?! Girlfriend's moving out of home soon, needs some furniture... was going to and check out Ikea. Are you sure?!

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
    hey that was back in September last year so I thought you could all do with a reminder. I can barely remember what I do the previous night (which works out ok for me sometimes) let alone months ago!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Drunken Monkey View Post
    Sounds robbed - Swedish furniture? Sounds like a reference to Ikea, which we don't get here...Other than that, uncannily observant...
    Just noticed, it's definately some sort of re-hash = NZ supermarkets don't have dispensaries (to issue prescription drugs).
    Not sure if it still does, but the Woolworths in Johnsonville had a pharmacy attached to it back in 2003. And I think you can get some Ikea stuff here through design stores, and I have an idea they are to open a store here in the future.
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by xerxesdaphat View Post
    We don't have Ikea here?! Girlfriend's moving out of home soon, needs some furniture... was going to and check out Ikea. Are you sure?!
    Nope, there's no Ikea here yet, though they're going to open a store when they can find an appropriate venue (somewhere near Auckland, I'm guessing). Some furniture companies will order in Ikea furniture from Australia, but in my opinion it really isn't worth the cost.

    I was miffed to find this out when I moved from Europe to NZ, but what can you do. Ikea furniture really isn't that great, but their advantage is that they sell mediocre new furniture for about the same price as you can buy mediocre used furniture elsewhere.

    Ikea stuff does pop up on TardMe every now and again, from people moving to the country and whatnot. Especially shower curtains. Don't ask me why.

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