A man goes up to the minister at his local church and says: "Reverend,
I have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons and
I find it very embarrassing, not to mention disrespectful. What should
I do?"
"Actually, the minister said, I have noticed this and I would like to
ask your co-operation this coming Sunday, if you will. When I notice Mrs
Jones asleep, I will nod my head to you and you to give her a good
poke with a sharp hatpin in the thigh."
In church the following Sunday, Mrs Jones indeed dozed off. Noticing this,
the minister put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for
you?" he said, nodding to Mr Jones.
"Jesus" Mrs. Jones cried out as her husband jabbed her in the leg with
the hatpin. "Yes! Very good Mrs Jones", came the minister's quick reply.
Soon, Mrs. Jones nodded off again. And, again the minister noticed.
"Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning toward Mr Jones.
"My God" howled Mrs. Jones, as she was again stuck with the hatpin.
"Right again!" bellowed the minister, a slight grin on his face.
Before long Mrs. Jones again started to nodd off. However, this time the
minister failed to notice, he had picked up the tempo and was concentrating
on his sermon. He was really going at it, with sweeping arm motions and
pointed stares at the congregation, one of which which Mr Jones understood
as a signal to again poke his wife with the hatpin.
The minister had got to the part in the sermon where he howled at the
congregation: "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones yelled: "You stick that thing in me one more time and
I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"
"Amen!" cried out the women of the congregation.
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