The swan

[Beemer]

Little Jessica - she's only six - can't sleep one night so she goes into her mummy and daddy's bedroom to ask if she can sleep with them. "of course darling," says her mummy, so little Jessica climbs into their bed and cuddles up against her daddy.

After a few minutes, Jessica asks a question.

"Daddy," she says. "What's that?"

Daddy goes bright red and wonders what to say. In a panic he blurts out "Er, that's my swan."

"I see. OK, well, night night daddy."

"Night night darling."

Daddy falls asleep.

When he wakes up, he's in the Intensive Care Ward in the nearest major hospital and he has an excrutiating pain between his legs. Opening his eyes, he sees his little Jessica sitting in a chair next to him, crying and crying. He summons up the strength to speak. "Wha.....what happened?" he eventually asks.

Through her sobs, Jessica explains. "Well daddy, I still couldn't sleep last night, so I started to stroke your swan, but it spat at me - so I broke its neck, crushed its eggs, and then I set fire to its nest."

[snot]

Yeah stroke my swan, little girl