The penis wants a pay rise...

**Colapop** · 17th October 2006, 20:04

Is there a position to fill?

**chanceyy** · 17th October 2006, 20:12

Originally Posted by Colapop

Is there a position to fill?

errrrrrrrrrrrr ummmmmmmm now that can be taken several ways ..

1) no position to fill
2) Mrs CP might have something to say about filling positions .. so no
3) no vacancy
4) No requirements at this time ..
5) thank you for applying though we will keep your cv on file for future reference

**James Deuce** · 17th October 2006, 20:37

If it retires before 65 than it serves you right for not dealing with that circulatory disorder you should have sorted in your 40s.

**MattRSK** · 17th October 2006, 20:37

Originally Posted by chanceyy

errrrrrrrrrrrr ummmmmmmm now that can be taken several ways ..

1) no position to fill
2) Mrs CP might have something to say about filling positions .. so no
3) no vacancy
4) No requirements at this time ..
5) thank you for applying though we will keep your cv on file for future reference

I have good references

**Maha** · 17th October 2006, 20:41

Originally Posted by chanceyy

errrrrr no i didn't .. I copied & pasted it .. there for not said, & not typed ..

So you didnt even make that up???........ how dissapointing.....

**chanceyy** · 17th October 2006, 20:45

Originally Posted by maha man

So you didnt even make that up???........ how dissapointing.....

nope ..& i thought it might be a repost .. but what the hell its still a good one .. !!

but I do have a wicked sense of humor ..

**chanceyy** · 17th October 2006, 20:47

Originally Posted by MattRSK

I have good references

please provide details of your references ..

your application will be considered.... then rejected

**MattRSK** · 17th October 2006, 20:56

Originally Posted by chanceyy

please provide details of your references ..

your application will be considered.... then rejected

Nah you will just contact my references ya lesbo. Nice burn though.

**chanceyy** · 17th October 2006, 20:59

Originally Posted by MattRSK

Nah you will just contact my references ya lesbo. Nice burn though.

lesbo ? .. lmfao .. thanks for the compliment .. but errr no I dunna swing that way ..

**Fub@r** · 8th June 2007, 13:07

THE PENIS WANTS A RAISE

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following

reasons:

1-------- I do physical labor.

2.------- I work at great depths.

3.------- I plunge head first into everything I do.

4.------- I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

5.--------I work in a damp environment.

6. -------I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.

7.------- I work in high temperatures.

8. -------My work exposes me to diseases.

Reply: Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have

raised, the management denies your request for the following

reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.

2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work

period.

3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen

visiting other locations.

5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and

stimulated in order to start working.

6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as

wearing the correct protective clothing.

8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.

9. You are unable to work double shifts.

10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have

completed the assigned task.

11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen

entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking
bags.

Sincerely,

The Management

Five reasons not to be a penis .

1. You're bald your whole life.

2. You have a hole in your head.

3. Your neighbors are nuts.

4. The guy behind you is an ass hole and...

5. Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint

**Bend-it** · 8th June 2007, 13:15

Cracks me up everytime!

**oldrider** · 8th June 2007, 13:34

Search for the perfect penis......the life quest of the perfect woman!

One way to fix that droop though guys, tie a pencil on it.

Then if you can't come, you can always write!

Cheers John.

**portokiwi** · 22nd February 2009, 12:28

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labour.
I work at great depths.
I plunge headfirst into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely,

P. Niss
The Response
Dear Penis:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team. You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations...
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You tend to throw up on the job.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the
Correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely,

V. Gina