The BIG C

[Krusti]

One thing I have learnt in life is that it is very easy to say, "If that happens I am going to do this"

Once you are in that situation it is a very different story.

[Fryin Finn]

I watched a close friend die from cancer a couple of years ago. He passed with courage and dignity and I grew from the experience. Life is just that, from start to end - Making a contribution to those who could benefit from it. I'm comforted by his memory and when it's my time I'll try to go as peacefully as he.
Got a few more enduros and Hare scrambles to go though - and I want to do 3 laps at next years Tarawera 100 and I want a big screen telly too. (we still had plenty of laughs when he was undergoing chemo)

[Nasty]

Its a hard question until you are there you never know how you will react.

I know closely two people currently who are flighting cancer. One was told in January that she had two-three months to live - has soft tissue cancer .. and is still here today - not for much longer though - she wanted to see her latest grandchild born and have some time with it and she has. Yesterday she was admitted to the hospice with little hope of leaving - but she has left many times before ... keeps fighting it off.

The other is my dad was diagnosed with chronic lymphocytic leukemia 7 years ago there is no cure and it is known to have an extremely slow progression ... he had his first chemo last year .. and it almost killed him ... they somehow killed off his entire immune system .. and he has been fighting infections and crap ever since. I don't want him to die ... I want him to fight ... as a family we did have a DNR (it was a horrid decision to make but was made for the right reasons) for a while when he was so close to dying and had almost given up the fight but he rallied and fought back again.

If he ends up in chronic pain and unable to function we are abke to let him go ... it will hurt but we love him .. he surprises us constantly with his tenacity and strength (pig headedness - where did I get mine from) many times already.

So overall I think you don't really know till you are there ... and then you take so many things into account when you make the decision that you will know it is the right one.

[Swoop]

Might need a bit of treatment to complete the contents of the list...

[deanohit]

Id try and combine 2 of the options. Try and finish off the list, which will have last thing to do, pass bottle and bike keys to me (able to speed up the list to the last thing if it all gets too much)

[BarBender]

I'm with Mrs Busa Pete.

I'm the type that would want to go out with a bang...
However - My wife and kids constantly remind me that they have as much right to me as I do to myself...

[rudolph]

Last month I got Diagnosed with some weard bone tumor, after much poking and prodding it turned out to be ok. but if it was terminal I would rather hurry up and die

[Paul in NZ]

Every situation is unique - its far too complex for relatively simple answers and the truth is you will never really know until you personally experience it.... certainly, I would never choose for others nor judge them on their choices - when we do get to look into the face of god , we all see different things, not all of them nice.

[MSTRS:Me]

One thing I have learnt in life is that it is very easy to say, "If that happens I am going to do this"

Once you are in that situation it is a very different story.

So true. And what 'you' would do, would be factored by any given day's emotional state.

[janno]

I would go the weirdo faith healing route because after over a decade of transplant drugs, chemo would finish me off for sure. My immune system has been suppressed for all of that time so it wouldn't handle much more mucking about with.

I'd go crystal waving hippy bullshit style just out of curiousity to see if it works. Though it probably wouldn't, considering I am fairly cynical about it all! And you are supposed to have complete faith for faith healing to work . . .

So, I would use my last days to be a living experiment.

I wouldn't be spending thousands though, just the usual herbal remedies, lifestyle changes, meditation and positive thinking. Not interested in spending the downpayment of a house on some shonky machine operated by two inline electric toothbrushes and the like. I'd rather give the money away to a great charity, in that case.

[Albino]

I would be very hesitant to base a big decision like this on the opinion of people who by and large are young fit and healthy.

Sitting here in front of my PC nursing a small hangover I like to think I'd pull out my list of things to do and go hard. But in reality I have no idea what my priorities would be if it happened to me, so really my opinion is not worth shit.

Regarding the suicide option(s) - if you're concerned about the amount of money needed for the therapy and the consequences of this on your family, then you also should also carefully consider the impact it would have on your kids if their dad topped himself.

[LilSel]

My best friends dad (early 50's) was diagnosed with advanced pancreatic C about 2 weeks ago, himself & family told he'd be lucky to last a month.
Due to this, they are not going down the chemo/rado track. He is hooked up to a morhpine pump that doses every 4 minutes to help with the pain. This will remain untill he passes. Is at home with his family & children. I have been over there a fair bit... Its sad how quickly it has happened, in saying that however, he has been lucky to have the time to say goodbye & get things in order for when he is gone. My best friend (23) is a mess, the least I can do is be her rock.

In the circumstance above, I agree with the non treatment track.
However other cancers can be treated with more sucess, my nana's breast cancer went into remission for approx 10 years before she was diagnosed with bone cancer and passed from that in 2000. Without treatment, we would have lost her from the breast cancer a decade sooner. Im thankful for the time I had with her over the extra ten years....

Its a tough one to make a call on, I dont think I can vote on the poll as am undecided, depends on circumstances.

To all that are going thru tough times with the C monster & family & friends. My thoughts are with you.

[ManDownUnder]

If it was just me - I like to think I'd fight it

But having a family changes that. There's no think about it... I'd fight it, just for them. While there's breath there's hope.

And yes - I am the eternal optimist... so sue me.

[Edbear]

Quality of life all the way. I've always said that if I end up (for whatever reason) a vegetable in hospital, then I want the plug pulled as soon as possible. If I know I'm going to die in a few months, then fine - I can prepare for it. But what's the point in getting another twelve months at the risk of spending that entire time in constant pain and unable to do anything I enjoy.

As Sarge said, hand me the bike keys - I'm off for one hell of a ride.

Many comments along these lines here, and I understand the thinking behind it. However I recall my father, upon being diagnosed with MS, saying that if/when he reached the state of being a vegetable with no quality of life, he would want to be euthanased.

Three days before he died - a tiny, pathetic, living skeleton, riddled with bedsores, on a Morphine pump - each breath exhausted him so that he would struggle in a shallow breath and then stop breathing until he recovered enough strength to struggle in another one, speaking in an almost inaudible whisper, one word at a time, barely able to open his eyes - he was asked if he would like the nurse to stop the antibiotic drip that was warding off pneumonia and let him pass away. He gasped out, "No, keep it going!"

It is one thing to express how you would feel if you found yourself in such a position, another thing to be in that position. I have been so sick on four occaisions, the Docs are puzzled as to why I am alive, I am supposed to be dead. (I just say it proves that only the good die young...). Each time, even on the last occaision when I wanted to die to end five years of pain, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving my loved ones and considered the "easy way out" would be selfish. I fought with every once of strength I had to resist the illness that was killing me.

Ask those who are suffering serious illness or disability on this forum how they feel.

Dad died Jan.1, '89 and I still miss him.

[Toaster]

Very much an individual thing in specific circumstances as far as treatment options go.

Suicide is definitely not an option. It solves nothing and only hurts more the people that love you.