Ex's partner

[Grahameeboy]

Well Mr Cave Man waving his toys again.

I served him with a Trespass Warning last night......took Nats to Dr's as she had a cough and with her condition etc....told ex......Steve was parked outside Dr's.

Get to work. Boss wants a word. Steve called work yesterday after I service warning and made ridiculous allegations......I had been upfront about things so work not worried as it does not impact on work but sounds like he was a bit abusive and the Manager who took call doesn't want to talk to him again.

Ex did the same a few months ago the first time I invlved the Police.....

I am thinking of sending him a shovel to help his digging.....

[007XX]

That really, really sucks...I feel mighty pissed off for you and Nat...fat lot of good it does, i realise that...But if there is anything I can do to help, don't hesitate to say.

[Patrick]

Of course it's serious. You can apply to the family court for an ex-parte non-molestation (or whatever the new name is) order I think. You may also get one via Police but I can't remember. Local community law centre can tell you on the phone.

That order prevents him from interferring in your life in any way whatsoever and includes phone calls, drive-bys, entering your street, parking outside your house or place of work and forbids him (& her if you have to) from calling people like the wheelchair centre about something you are doing.

Well worth looking into Graham... means he can't ring, write letters, drive by or even be in the same shop if you are there (within reason...) and all of the above. Keep the bosses on side and advised... Would be worth discussing Criminal Harrassment as well...

It sounds like you're really copping some crap. Keep your head down and as I've said before, take notes; they're digging their own grave. It might take time but hang in there. Also, is there anyone who'd be prepared to 'live in' for a few weeks, just to add some fodder?

Keep a record of times, place, regos, etc for his visits and also for his phone calls, even to work if poss... Present all of it to the Ex and if she won't sort it out and see it for what it is, you're building a solid case for custody of Nats???

[Paul in NZ]

Patrick makes a good point. Often a court case comes down to believability and the side with the best objective evidence stands a better chance.

Above all - make sure you are not inciting this by doing daft things like sending him a shovel!!!!

[avgas]

As in these guys?
http://www.lawncare.co.nz/index.html
DOS anyone im not good enough
Anyhow - Do we need a big KB mob to tell Cave man where it stands? Cos I'd be into that.
People that mess with Kids in the middle don't deserve to walk in my mind.
I hope that your ex-partner can get over herself. As she sounds like a selfish bitch.
At the end of the day ya kid comes first.
Cave man should but the fuck out and fuck off. 3rd parties are as helpful as broken spokes.
Shit im all wound up now. Whats this pricks address and license plate/vehicle.
Fucken assholes

[ManDownUnder]

Grahame... stop by anytime man - you know where I am. Come and let your hair down - hell... I'm due to part with mine... help yerself!

re Nats... slowly but surely man...
Build the case and don't put a foot out of place. Turning the other cheek ain't goin to help on this one though. It's Nats' cheek too and to have her caught in the crossfire just sucks.

A couple of things. Stay safe. No matter what happens - make sure you and Nats have immediate safe haven. I hope it doesn't come to it but you know where I live - if you show up at 2:00 with a car fuill of gear... you're welcome to stay... we have some very "handy" neighbours too and if a tractor happened to get parked on a certain one way bridge - ain't no way anyone is going to drive in (or possibly leave).

Take the name of the caveman off here too. I'm sure it breaching some privacy laws, possibly sedicious etc. Keep your nose clean (painful I know).

Now for the fireworks. Escalate this as far and fast as you can. You need a strategy laid out before you so you're not just planning the next step - you need the whole game plan in your head so any reactions are reasonabl anticipated, and you're ready.

Trespass Orders are a great start. You need to be safe, Nats needs to be safe and Caveman needs to know where the limits are. He needs to see them enforced too. What would he do if the cops hauled him over the coals for something - take it and learn or escalate it? If he escalates it see if he's willing to do it at a time when you have friends over for dinner. I know a Marine that LOVES cups of tea.

Keep that diary going - good stuff.

Strange q - does Caveman have any priors for assault or drugs? Anything like that? Sounds like the kind of guy to do so... and if he's a danger to Nats - that's got to be the #1 concern.

Last... and this is insulting but... are you being reasonable? Is there a way throught his where you can have an extra power supply or chair or... etc. If life is easy for Nats and you it's got to be a good thing.

[Toaster]

Stick claymores on your front lawn.... fabulous for getting them pesky possums too.

Red Mist baby yeah!

[DMNTD:Me]

I'm usually one of the first to whack some fuck knuckle like this however what Patrick(and others) have suggested and what you are already doing is the right way to go about it.

I've Heke'd 2 of my X's boyfriends due to similar but more "assertive" situations and despite the fact that it worked due to severity of said Heke's and their understanding that I'd return,it just made things harder in the long run and lets face it it's immature and what would the kids think?

You're doing extremely well G...keep it up and stay strong man.

[Finn]

Excuse the punn G, but aren't you being a bit of a drama queen?

Besides, Steve Reeves should have a spare powered wheelchair that his brother Christopher left behind.

[Grahameeboy]

Grahame... stop by anytime man - you know where I am. Come and let your hair down - hell... I'm due to part with mine... help yerself!

re Nats... slowly but surely man...
Build the case and don't put a foot out of place. Turning the other cheek ain't goin to help on this one though. It's Nats' cheek too and to have her caught in the crossfire just sucks.

A couple of things. Stay safe. No matter what happens - make sure you and Nats have immediate safe haven. I hope it doesn't come to it but you know where I live - if you show up at 2:00 with a car fuill of gear... you're welcome to stay... we have some very "handy" neighbours too and if a tractor happened to get parked on a certain one way bridge - ain't no way anyone is going to drive in (or possibly leave).

Take the name of the caveman off here too. I'm sure it breaching some privacy laws, possibly sedicious etc. Keep your nose clean (painful I know).

Now for the fireworks. Escalate this as far and fast as you can. You need a strategy laid out before you so you're not just planning the next step - you need the whole game plan in your head so any reactions are reasonabl anticipated, and you're ready.

Trespass Orders are a great start. You need to be safe, Nats needs to be safe and Caveman needs to know where the limits are. He needs to see them enforced too. What would he do if the cops hauled him over the coals for something - take it and learn or escalate it? If he escalates it see if he's willing to do it at a time when you have friends over for dinner. I know a Marine that LOVES cups of tea.

Keep that diary going - good stuff.

Strange q - does Caveman have any priors for assault or drugs? Anything like that? Sounds like the kind of guy to do so... and if he's a danger to Nats - that's got to be the #1 concern.

Last... and this is insulting but... are you being reasonable? Is there a way throught his where you can have an extra power supply or chair or... etc. If life is easy for Nats and you it's got to be a good thing.

Noted and xx'd.

Wheelchair costs $40,000.....I have spare charger now....so no chance of a spare chair..........

Always reasonable..only way to be......

Thanks for other offers....luckily he only harrases when Nats is not there but if he did it when Nats was there then PC would go out of window......I still have my Boken from Aikido.......

[Grahameeboy]

Of course it's serious. You can apply to the family court for an ex-parte non-molestation (or whatever the new name is) order I think. You may also get one via Police but I can't remember. Local community law centre can tell you on the phone.

That order prevents him from interferring in your life in any way whatsoever and includes phone calls, drive-bys, entering your street, parking outside your house or place of work and forbids him (& her if you have to) from calling people like the wheelchair centre about something you are doing.

Cheers Grub...will look into that cause time to use the Law now I reckon....he should know never to mess with London Boys..........

[Grahameeboy]

Excuse the punn G, but aren't you being a bit of a drama queen?

Besides, Steve Reeves should have a spare powered wheelchair that his brother Christopher left behind.

Yep thanks for your input Finn....don't call us we will call you.....

[Grahameeboy]

Well worth looking into Graham... means he can't ring, write letters, drive by or even be in the same shop if you are there (within reason...) and all of the above. Keep the bosses on side and advised... Would be worth discussing Criminal Harrassment as well...



Keep a record of times, place, regos, etc for his visits and also for his phone calls, even to work if poss... Present all of it to the Ex and if she won't sort it out and see it for what it is, you're building a solid case for custody of Nats???

I have equal shared custody and I know what you will say but I don't want to tear Nats away from Kate either......she has also gone through a lot with Nats diagnosis......hard one eh.

[avgas]

Caveman cant drive very far with flat tyres. Still wanting that plate number/vehicle type. Im going for a ride tomorrow night round 1-2am anyhow.

[Grahameeboy]

Caveman cant drive very far with flat tyres. Still wanting that plate number/vehicle type. Im going for a ride tomorrow night round 1-2am anyhow.

No, 2 wrongs and all that...........request made to refrain.

Problem is he will immediatley think it had something to do with me.

The right way will prevail. I have got this far after 2 years and not been beaten down yet.