What the hell am I doing? Surely this is not real life?

[ching_ching]

I notice there are few IT people on this site. Can't any of you hook the brother up?

[KATWYN]

Yeah, just gotta suck it in and do this for a while eh.

.

You got it. Patience & sacrifices are the key. Start saving, even just a few dollers a week (put it in an account that is a hassel for you to get money out of - after a while you will forget you are even doing it), in the meantime, get rid of the debts. It could be you both need to make some sacrifices in some lifestyle choices for a while. Anytime you have a few extra dollers after
debts are reducing, add it to whats going into your savings account.

Living expenses are all relative to where you live (ie) you might earn a little
bit more in Auckland, but your rent and expenses reflect that increase in earnings as well. It would be no different to living in Whangarei (in fact it may be harder to save!)

Once again, Patience & sacrifice (by the two of you) - it will be worth it in the end

[Paul in NZ]

Mate... You just gotta suck your gut in and go for it... It's called work for a good reason, if it was that much fun it would be called a hobby!

I like my job! But I've had shitty years and shitty jobs too. However, even a crap job can be a lot better with a good attitude. You are not going to be working at Mitre 10 your whole life but you will have to carry your attitude with you for that time. Spend some time and get your head straight now and the rest of your life will be a breeze!

Every day, even in the best job in the world you will need to deal with unpleasant tasks and or people. If you do it with a smile, even though you hate it and do it as well as you can, you will feel better about it.

Make the most out of every opportunity that comes your way! Working in the power tool dept might not be your dream but success breed success! Sell more tools, stack those shelves better whatever it takes!

Paul N

[Mongoose]

Financial woes are crap and will strain most relationships. If your own budgeting is not working, hard as it is, try budgeting advice, they are tough, because we as humans tend not to be tough enough on ourselves financialy, but fair and do not expect no treats at all.
My tuppence worth, been there so do appreciate what you are saying.
Only other thing I would suggest, if and when you decide to move, get the job first.

[vifferman]

Coupla things:

• You're still young. I know it's not normally a characteristic of youf, but try to be patient.
• While you say you have debts, you're not yet saddled with a mortgage or anything serious. At least you've got a regular income, so if you're sensible (and don't just bugger off overseas like someone suggested), you should be OK. Sounds like you're managing your finances OK, so try to get some money put aside because you'll need it if you do move to D'Auckland for work (it's expensive here). You'll need a deposit for accommodation, some furniture, etc etc.
• Try to formulate a plan for where you're going - it will help. My life has been just drifting along, and while I'm paid OK, and have a job in IT (woohooo....), I've been here over 5 years, I HATE my job and it's ferked my health. All because I didn't plan a career, and didn't follow my passion.
• Realise that while there are lots more jobs in D'Auckland, there's also LOTS more competition. We get over 400 (!) applications every time we advertise, partly due to everyone pushing the "jobs in IT" barrow, so there's bazillions of IT graduates vying for a handful of jobs. If you can make some contacts, rather than applying on-line or through an agency, you've got a better shot at it. Apart from a few people I've met through KB, I've got no contacts, so it's hard to 'get a foot in the door'. Also, I'm old and crusty, and everyone knows once you're over 30 you have no brains anymore. So you've got what... 12 years (?) still to get your 'dream job'.
• FWIW, my son is just a bit younger than you, and is an absolute computer / technology / telecomms whizz. He's working in a shop too, and he hates it too. But despite spending much of his 'discretionary income' on techno toys, he's paid off most of his car, and he's established a good work history, which counts for a lot. Remember: it's easier to get a job if you're already in one. Not only does it make you look like a better prospect (referees, work history, etc.) but it also makes you less desperate and this helps in interviews.
• Get some qualifications behind you - it's a very competitive job market.

Hope this helps a bit, Ant. Keep your chin up, and try to keep a positive attitude. Keep an eye open for opportunities, rather than dwelling on the problems.

[scumdog]

What Paul & Mongoose said. You won't be at Mitre 10 doing the same job FOREVER!
Tough it out to get a bit of employment credibility and DO NOT leave until you have another job to step into.

Your comment about "working you guts out etc" is a fact of life, if you just want to 'exist' then laze around, if you want to 'live' then you'll have to work matey, especially if you want a few 'toys'.

BTW, regarding your hours, I've done 11.5hr nightshifts in a factory, 5 days a week (overtime meant coming back on a Friday night) AND I had a 72 km drive each way to/from work, I toughed it out for a year and moved on.

Now? Unsure of exact finishing time each day/night or if I'll get called out and I get one weekend in three off work (although I have at times worked 5 wekends in a row before getting one off) but I like my 'toys' and like the variety of work (not sure about some of the clients though!).

It's called 'life' and we all have to pay our 'dues', Good Luck!!!

[MikeL]

Swap ya.

You can have my job, salary, assets (house, 2 cars, 2 bikes, bank account...) - the whole lot.

One catch: you have to have my age as well. I'll take yours.

[manuboy]

Coupla things:
[*]Try to formulate a plan for where you're going - it will help. My life has been just drifting along, and while I'm paid OK, and have a job in IT (woohooo....), I've been here over 5 years, I HATE my job and it's ferked my health. All because I didn't plan a career, and didn't follow my passion.

Hahaha.. not laughing.. just wondering how many people that comment could apply to. Me and 75% of the popultion maybe? I WAS the same, then one day i just figured that hating my job was taking up 90% of my energy and the farkin job didn't deserve that.

Ant, just a few comments:

One of the VERY few things i can say in life for SURE, is that there are always worse things you could be doing. Try not to forget it. In fact, every time you think about how much the job thing sucks (which might be only a part of your "issues"), instead think about how much other stuff doesn't suck. Like your partner and stuff...

Mate i'm sure we could easily start a competition here. I've done everything from orchard work to freezing works to farm labouring, but the worst job i seen is the ladies in Nelson, in NZ King Salmon who get paid heaps (boredom pay - really) to pick bones you and me couldn't even see out of salmon for 7 hour shifts. They stand there with tweezers mate in a cold aluminium room. Faaaaarrk that.

Also, don't underestimate your health.... nothing like a few mates in wheelchairs and rellies up and dying and stuff to knock some sense into you about the value of the SMALL things in life.

Oh yeah... the odd ride in the sun with a bit of a grin on ya dial is always good.....

[Ms Piggy]

Hey Ant,
There is some VERY good advice being given out here and it's being given out by people who have the experience (see like the way i put experience and not old codgers!) and hindsight, myself included.

At the moment you may have to work to live. All the best.

[Dr Bob]

Ant

Well where do I start. I guess the first thing is don't worry too much, there is plenty of time to sort it. I have worked in multiple industries and have had at least three distinct careers- don't think that you are stuck in I.T. even if you can't get a job in I.T.

Don't move to Auckland without a job, I was made redundant twice in six months in the early ninties and probably felt much worse than you do. I went to uni at Waikato and got a degree then a Phd. It took a massive chunk of my life and I had very little money; however, I didn't stop living during this time, I just did different things. I worked as a chef, I started martial arts, I met a girl... and while we were both full time students we bought a house (albeit a very cheap one).

Think about these options.

Join the airforce and become a pilot. They will pay for your further education and you get a licence. You will be away from your girlfriend / wife at times but they often have cheap accomodation on the base - you both might like it and you won't be able to spend money.

Become a teacher, primary or secondary. The Govt. is looking for both I.T. people and Males, you can probably get a good scholarship. The pay is good and you don't have to live in an expensive area of the country - we have schools in most parts of N.Z.(although that is changing a bit).

Sign up to a talent agency to work as an extra / model.

Write a book.

Look through the situations vacant and look for what might be a shit job at the moment that has definate career options.



May the force be with you.

[Motu]

Um...wots IT? I guess it's something to do with computers.

There are a shit load of people who work in the computer field - in the 70s we had shit loads of people working in factories,same thing.You may be qualified,but your chosen field of work is flooded with nerds just like you.Get away from a job where you are one of thousands - get a real job...go work for Mitre 10,take home a wheel barrow every night.

[toads]

Yeah I might have just panicked there, it's just that I have debts and so does she. We're both working, but she's part time. Budgeting in this century is a bitch.

I have to echo stonechucker on this one, having someone to share your life with, and all it's joys and frustrations is not as bad as having to shoulder on alone, and also many people work much longer hours just to pay the bills. Often people are unable to climb out of a finanacial rut and move to another city because they are too committed to do so, you are young enough to have lots of choices, and you have not yet got the responsibility of children to consider, it appears to me, from reading several of your posts, that you tend to worry about all the what if's, I used to do it a lot when I was young ( creaking sounds)
I was given some advice when I had the triplets and panicked about how I was going to cope with the then terrifying future.
here is is, one step at a time, don't try to work out stuff that hasn't happened yet, just take everything that happens each day as an isolated incident, and gradually things will become more managable and clearer, you can't live any more than one minute at a time. cheers

[toads]

You need a good life coach you do

This may or may not make you feel better....I've returned to the UK cos my wife and kids missed the family in the yUK. Though I had 18 years experience in IT service and people management and had run a successful coaching company in NZ I was unable to get a position in the weeks leading to the return home....or since. I took a mortgage advisor position to improve my face to face and phones sales....and left when the money never materialised. An IT contract rolling out windows 2000 to 1000 workstations was pulled after 4 weeks and I am now scraping a living driving a taxi. Still I am debt free and my 3 kids are still clothed and fed, and my wife of 19 years still loves me ahhhhhh Oh yeah and I have an RSVR that's all mine...shame I can't afford to insure it.

I will return to coaching as it's what sets me on fire, I'm good at it, and the financial return will not be as bad as driving drunks every night.

BTW my wife and kids have come to the realisation that NZ is far better for us than UK. Sadly it will take time and money to plan the return......unless I found a job that I could just fly over to and start on.

Well, we will look forward to having yas all back again sometime in the future then!!

[Antallica]

Thanks guys, neded a reality check.

I know all about the 'it could be worse' philosophy, and I usually live by that. Hell I used to work over the road at the New World, bloomin' oats it CAN be worse!

[El Dopa]

BTW my wife and kids have come to the realisation that NZ is far better for us than UK. Sadly it will take time and money to plan the return......unless I found a job that I could just fly over to and start on.

That makes me feel better about coming over here. Not that I have any second thoughts, what with the people here being so nice and all.

Good luck with planning your return.

Ant, lots of luck with sorting it all out. The only advice I can really give is: don't give up, keep pluggnig away at it and you'll get somewhere, whether it's where you are now or somewhere else.