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Thread: Off topic, but fuck these sandflies!

  1. #1
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    7th March 2006 - 08:30
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    eek Off topic, but fuck these sandflies!

    Bloody hell, is it this european blood they like sinking their teeth into or am I just being paranoid.

    I splat one the other day on my leg and I swear it must have been having a yawn at the time, as the spread of his nashers was huge and yerk the mess, that tiny little bastard left.

    I use the anti sandfly stuff, but I think it attracts them, (does anyone have any stuff that attracts men?!! like sandflies..

    These critters get me so bloody (sandflies that is not men.....as I love men...yum!!!). ahem anyway and its not just the sandlflies having a go, I went to the Hawea rally and went on the Saturday morning bike jaunt and a ferking wasp flew down my top and stung me several times, I much prefer Bees, they're well choosy when they sting, wasps are indiscriminate little bastards. I found out that particular morning, how easy it is to ride without hands.!!!

    On reaching the pub, they must have thought a mad woman had arrived....my arms were windmilling everywhere I ripped my top off, and jumped on it, which then only made the wasp explode into the size of an erupting volcano on my shirt.

    Does anyone know of any sandfly whisperers that I could learn from?

    Perhaps I should grab one, tear its wings off and eat it as a reminder to the rest of them what happens when you mess with the wrath of Jan...... That was a sandfly you understand not a man.....!!

    See you in 8 days time at the Waikia rally, coi for now

    Woodybee AKA Jan
    "I'm gunna hug ya, and squeeze ya, and call ya George!" "Spread the smile and watch it come back at cha" x

    Thank you to those who came to the Garstonian Rally 2009, heads up for the 2010 Rally.......

  2. #2
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    13th March 2003 - 11:47
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    I rode out to Lake Ferry on New Year's day and felt something hit my neck as we were going out there. Being a hot day I had my leather jacket on just over my KB t-shirt.

    Get to the pub and I feel a bit of a lump under my shirt at my belly level. Reach inside and pull it out and cripes it was a wasp. Now it must have died on impact as I would surely have been stung otherwise, so phew luckily I was fine unlike your experence.
    Cheers

    Merv

  3. #3
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    21st September 2006 - 21:35
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    Try spraying something with a bad smell all over you... like cat pee or something...
    "Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary - that's what gets you."
    Jeremy Clarkson.

    Kawasaki 200mph Club

  4. #4
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    1st October 2005 - 23:01
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    can sandflies spread AIDS?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disco Dan View Post
    Try spraying something with a bad smell all over you... like cat pee or something...
    Is that what's worked for you?
    Cheers

    Merv

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by merv View Post
    Is that what's worked for you?
    nope, just would be funny if she tried it...
    "Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary - that's what gets you."
    Jeremy Clarkson.

    Kawasaki 200mph Club

  7. #7
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    Funny man

    Quote Originally Posted by Disco Dan View Post
    nope, just would be funny if she tried it...
    Oh your funny aint cha mate? Dont give up yer day job will you......
    "I'm gunna hug ya, and squeeze ya, and call ya George!" "Spread the smile and watch it come back at cha" x

    Thank you to those who came to the Garstonian Rally 2009, heads up for the 2010 Rally.......

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by woodybee View Post
    Bloody hell, is it this european blood they like sinking their teeth into or am I just being paranoid.
    Maybe the sandflies aren't fussy on who they bite?

  9. #9
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    26th September 2006 - 16:33
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    Must have a sweet tooth!
    "Statistics are used as a drunk uses lampposts - for support, not illumination."

  10. #10
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    Perfumes

    ROFL
    My lady is into the "natural " smellys
    Soaps, body wash, shampoo, purfume.....all that sort of "normal" girly stuff.
    And yeap she smells good...real good. I love it! And its a good turn on
    Yet!!!
    We can sit outside in the sun, and the flies, wasps, bees etc swamp her!!!!!
    Im left behind in the rush!
    We go to the west coast......swamped by the flying terrors...sandflies.
    Well, this I dont understand, I know she is sexy, but
    I never get bitten, never get swamed at, dressed in just a pair of stubbies and jandles anywhere not a problem!! I only use Palmolive Oil soap for everything! Even that!
    so why!
    ROFL
    Insect eat just like us to live...so?
    What do they eat?
    Pollen from flowers, necture, fruit jucies, sweet smelling stuff.
    Nature has provided fauna with these things to attract insects.
    Lodgic peoples lodgic.
    Ladies wear all these natural smellys, Lavender oil, honey soap, Allovera shampoo etc etc,
    Then top it off with rose scented purfume!!!
    Dumb, uninteligent fly, wasp, bug, smells FOOD!!!!!!!
    Inmagine the aroma of Tui's Brewery.....mmmmmmmmm
    Would you guys just want to follow that smell to the ends of life???
    HELL YES!!!! Especially when its operated by WOMEN....BEAUTIFULL WOMEN!!!
    SO
    Lady and I discuss this point,
    She has a shower with just plain old Palmolive Gold Soap.
    No flies. No Bees. Nothing!!
    Not a scientific approach by any streach of the bungie
    But if you want to smell like a rose.....expect a bee to feed on you.
    Test my theory, if its wrong, at least you wont pong,

    To be old and wise, first you must be young and stupid.

  11. #11
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    Im with you......new to Auckland and they are KILLING ME........I get huge welts that fucking wake me up at night.....I have fucking scabs from scratching....grrrrrrrrrrrrr

    Lesson.........I spray every day

    Itchy cream is my new best friend

    Ok so wtf are sandflies good for anyways
    What exactly is their purpose

    DIE SANDFLIES DIE
    --------------------------------------------------------

    ANSWER = ID RATHER BE RIDING!
    ------------------------------------------------------

  12. #12
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    We are told that (apart from some bat, Chalinolobus tuberculatus) there were no land mammals in New Zealand prior to the arrival of Homo sapiens sapiens. If this is true, what did the fucking sandflies feed on beforehand?
    "Standing on your mother's corpse you told me that you'd wait forever." [Bryan Adams: Summer of 69]

  13. #13
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    Try upping your vitamin B intake, most parasitic insects dont seem to like blood rich in vit B.
    Never let your enemy see your emotions, for it is the one weapon they will value most.



  14. #14
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    Before anyone mentions vitamin B, I'd like to say it's a total myth, anecdotal, and hasn't been shown to be useful despite massive tests by the US army and the World Health Organisation.
    Determined to kill my bike before it kills me

  15. #15
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    Oh, too late.
    Determined to kill my bike before it kills me

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