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Thread: Best analogy competition.

  1. #1
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    3rd January 2005 - 11:00
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    Best analogy competition.

    No rules - just post them. New ones preferably.


    'Face like a dropped pie.'

  2. #2
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    Disappeared quicker than a fart in a fan factory
    Member, sem fiddy appreciation society


    Quote Originally Posted by PrincessBandit View Post
    I find it ironic that the incredibly rude personal comments about Les were made by someone bearing an astonishing resemblance to a Monica Lewinsky dress accessory.

    Quote Originally Posted by PrincessBandit View Post
    All was good until I realised that having 105kg of man sliding into my rear was a tad uncomfortable after a while

  3. #3
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    goes together like cheese and baghdad

  4. #4
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    "That woman has more issues than a years subscription to Womans Day magazine"



    "More RAM than a field of sheep"
    "Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary - that's what gets you."
    Jeremy Clarkson.

    Kawasaki 200mph Club

  5. #5
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    She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

    Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
    No body move... I dropped my brain

  6. #6
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    That word was as impressive as 'Marmite' or 'Wheelbarrow'

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  7. #7
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    "every now and then you realise your workplace is a zoo, and the monkeys seem to be in charge"
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

  8. #8
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    Thick as fuck, and twice as ugly ( or stupid - you choose for the situation ).

  9. #9
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    Dumb as a box of hammers

    Stupid as a ham hock
    Quote Originally Posted by rachprice View Post
    Jrandom, You are such a woman hating cunt, if you weren't such a misogynist bastard you might have a better luck with women!

  10. #10
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    More dangerous than a monkey with a gun

    Abanded like a baby in a dumpster

    Gutted, like a Jack the Ripper victim.
    Quote Originally Posted by rachprice View Post
    Jrandom, You are such a woman hating cunt, if you weren't such a misogynist bastard you might have a better luck with women!

  11. #11
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    Well that's screwed then.

  12. #12
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    8th November 2007 - 18:58
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    Not an analogy...but like it all the same - When asked so what's this stuff good for?

    Reply very quickly:

    Coughs, colds, sore holes, rocks, pocks piles and pimples on yer dicky!

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Number One View Post
    Not an analogy...but like it all the same - When asked so what's this stuff good for?

    Reply very quickly:

    Coughs, colds, sore holes, rocks, pocks piles and pimples on yer dicky!
    Just tried that...and i'fe goft a blifter on my tongue...
    Quote Originally Posted by Wolf View Post
    Time to cut out the "holier/more enlightened than thou" bullshit and the "slut" comments and let people live honestly how they like providing they're not harming themselves or others in the process.

  14. #14
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    Well that went down like a cup of cold sick

  15. #15
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    1st November 2005 - 08:18
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    Quote Originally Posted by ManDownUnder View Post
    "every now and then you realise your workplace is a zoo, and the monkeys seem to be in charge"
    You are familiar with the "5 monkey theory"?

    Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water.

    After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

    Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him.
    After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

    Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm!

    Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

    After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana. Why not? Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been done around here ...

    ... and that's how company policy begins.



    "Face like a pavement pizza".
    TOP QUESTION: Is it called the 'Holy' Bible because the story in it is so full of holes?

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