Share your txt jokes

[Bikkie]

I can't believe how many chocolates I've
gotten this christmas season! I still have 40
more doors to open on my Diane Abbott
advent calender.

To everyone who received a book from
me at Christmas.They're due back
at the library in two weeks.

A scouser goes on the antiques roadshow
with a very rare vase,
Hugh Scully asks,
"How did you acquire the vase?"
The scouser says,"It was
handed down to me.
Hugh Scully,"Where
from?" The scouser
replies,"An upstairs
window."

Have you seen the
new online "Emo
community Hub?
www.emo.com/wrists


The good thing about
marriage is that you
can have sex at any
time you
want............As long
as you're the one with
the vagina.

What do you call a
woman without a
clitoris? It doesn't
matter,she's not going
to come.

All in all...it was a
good orgy.

What do you call a
letter from a feminist?
Hate male

.I told my mum that
"WTF" means "Wow
That's Fantastic" Her
texts are so much
more fun now.

My mate Dave is an
lip reader.Well
I say lip reader,he's
actually a deaf
Gynecologist.

I went to a travel agent
today and asked for the
taste of America
experience.She shot me.

[WALRUS]

Cassina...

[Akzle]

Cassina...

i think you're looking for the "sickest jokes" thread...

[Bikkie]

I'll remember 2017 like
it was yesterday.

Dear Luck.....can we be
friends in 2018 please?

Just heard that in 2018
there will be a new
device that can turn
thoughts into speech.I
have had that for years,
it's called alcohol.

I was going to quit
drinking for the new year,
but then I remembered
no one likes a quitter.


A gay footballer has
been sacked from his
defensive position at
a premier league
club. He wasn't tight
enough at the back.


Saying "I drink beer
because I
like the taste" is a bit like
saying "I watch porn
because I like the
story."

My wife just came out
of the bedroom
wearing a Nurses
outfit.I thought
Fucking Awesome.
She's going to work.

Started a new job as a
delivery man today.
When I got to my first
address there was a
little sticky note left
on the door saying,
"Dear Mr delivery
man,we're out,please
hide in garage." That
was eight hours ago
and still nobody's
found me.

[Bikkie]

i think you're looking for the "sickest jokes" thread...

No not looking for sickest joke thead.

[Akzle]

No not looking for sickest joke thead.

are you mildly retarded?

[Bikkie]

No need for the insult!

[Bikkie]

Sex is like a gas station.
Sometimes you get full service,
sometimes,you gotta ask for service,
And somtimes you have to be happy with self service.


Just seen this hot babe working out at the gym.
So I asked her if she had made any New Year resolutions.
"Fuck you," she said.
Looks like a great 2018 for me already then.
Hope you all have one too.

[Woodman]

Sex is like a gas station.
Sometimes you get full service,
sometimes,you gotta ask for service,
And somtimes you have to be happy with self service.

And sometimes you pull out early and spray petrol all over the car.

[Akzle]

No need for the insult!

*interrogative: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Question_mark

[Bikkie]

It's an insult though.

[Akzle]

It's an insult though.

you clearly don't comprehend how insults work. which corroborates my theory that you're mildly retarded.

[FJRider]

No not looking for sickest joke thead.

Post #949 ... you started your own ...

[FJRider]

It's an insult though.

Do you find ALL questions insulting ... ??? if you do ... perhaps ...

[FJRider]

No need for the insult!

It was a question. If you see it as an insult ... perhaps he was correct ...