I had an accident at work yesterday. Did the right thing and filled out the standard accident report form. There wasn't enough room on the form to describe the accident though so I prepared a statement to attach to the report, the text of which is copied here. It left my boss collapsed on her desk, laughing uncontrollably and with with tears streaming from her eyes. Here folks ... for your entertainment is what did it to her: (oh, I work in Admin at a place that looks after adults with an intellectual disability ... those are the 'residents' I refer to)
Accident Report, 28 March
I was kicking a couple of soccer balls around with a group of residents. This was interesting as wherever they tried to kick the ball it always seemed to pass about 1.5 metres to the left of the goal. On reflection I think my mistake was standing 1.5 metres to the left of the goal.
I had just kicked a ball back to one of them but failed to notice an incoming ball which must have been kicked with some force. I became aware of the incoming ball when it smashed into my groin (with some force)
The natural reflex action to wrap oneself up into the foetal position took place while a mental assessment of the damage was undertaken. On discovering I could still breath OK and was not infact cross-eyed, with back turned to the residents a quick inventory was taken of the damaged area. I am indebted to the advice of my old soccer coach who told us that during injuries like this ... "Don't rub 'em, just count 'em"
A self treatment plan of 'a few deep breaths and stretch out slowly' was made and seems to have been effective as I was able to kick a couple more (soccer) balls back before making my excuses to the group and returning to work.
The prognisis is for a full recovery although there does appear to be some swelling in the area although that may be unrelated
Richard"
Why is it that regardless of the circumstances, a guy getting hit in the nuts is always so funny? (Actually I had tears of laughter rolling down my face just watching her reaction as she read the report as of course I only put it in for a bit of Friday afternoon fun.)
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) I understand pain in the nether regions.. 
so your experience HAD to hurt... 
but ferk mate.. your accident report was FERKIN FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
original quote from 98tls - Who gives a shite about Kw when you can all arrive in Fox at the same time sit and have a coffee and thank fuck for motorcycles..whatever the wording on the gas tank.
Originally Posted by Big Dan
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