These glorious insults are from an era when cleverness with words was
still valued, before a great portion of the English language got boiled down to
4-letter words, not to mention waving middle fingers.
The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, "If you were my
husband I'd give you poison," and he said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink
it."
A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the
gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir," said
Disraeli, "on whether I embrace your policies or your mistress."
"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -
Winston Churchill
"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." - Winston
Churchill
"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
pleasure." Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the
dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" -
Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading
it." Moses Hadas
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
Abraham Lincoln
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."
Mark Twain
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." - Oscar
Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a
friend.... If you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... If there is
one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -
Stephen Bishop
"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -
Irvin S. Cobb
"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." -
Samuel Johnson
"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure." - Jack E.
Leonard
"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." - Robert Redford
"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human
knowledge." - Thomas Brackett Reed
"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
Charles, Count Talleyrand
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"
- Mark Twain
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -
Oscar Wilde
"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... For support rather
than illumination." - Andrew Lang (18 44-1912)
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening But this wasn't it." - Groucho
Marx
Reply With Quote
Originally Posted by Wolf
Now, put your back into it, like we girls would! 
Bookmarks