What's one of the stupidest things you've done as a kid?

[lb99]

Far out....

I remember attacking a wasp nest with my 2 mates, and ended up being the only one that got stung.

One of the best/dumbest/funniest stories I have involves fireworks, does anyone remember those fireworks called Thunder in the Blue Sky? They fired a little tube way up into the air and just exploded.

Me and my genius mate reckoned that since the little tube flew into the air and exploded, if we took the tube out and stuck a wick and a stick on to it, it would work the same as a skyrocket.

It never occurred to us that the tube didn't fly by itself and was launched by something else in the firework. So, we took the tube out, stuck a wick and a stick on it and sure enough it just sat there on the ground and exploded. It was REALLY LOUD. I couldn't hear anything for at least 5 seconds afterwards.

I also managed to crash a nifty 50 into an electric fence...still got no idea how it happened I just remember flying off the bike, hitting all 3 hot wires then flying back off the fence and landing in the middle of the road, stumbling around for at least 10 minutes afterwards wondering what the hell happened.

I've fallen out of trees many times, cracked my head open a few times (and have the scars to prove it), nearly got a criminal record for doing prank calls, flooded the bathroom on at least one occasion, and the list goes on.....

haha
I remember those, jam em upside down in the fussy old neighbours lawn = big hole.

put a whole carton in the stove at some random party, turned it on and then went home. REALLY LOUD BANG, some chick who's parents were away needs a new stove in a hurry.

[svr]

Anyone else thinking `Lots of good ideas here...'?

Anyway, about 1990, driving to town drunk after a vmcc (or manawatu orion) meeting we took on the big roundabout in the industrial part of palmy north - at about 80 kays. We couldnt believe we hadn't crashed so we thought we'd better try it at 90. Still bloody made it! Bit faster we thought. In hindsight 130was way too fast for the ex Billy (kb) corolla (er no ownership papers with that one) but was a piece of piss for parallel parking after that - just let go of the wheel.
Something about being young and racing bikes - you think theres no way you could get hurt in a car like ya nanna drives..
Also burnt my face checking to see if the iron was hot (er that was 2 weeks ago age 39)

[martybabe]

After giving me a spit wash,my mom stood me at the bottom of the stairs and said "stay right there, I'm going upstairs to get changed then we'll go out, now don't move!"

The nano second she hit the top of the stairs, I was out the back door I found this triangular shaped stick and I thought it looked like a batarang so I threw it as hard as I could up into the sky, I was easily distracted as a child, ok still am, and I spotted a little pussy cat next door, I was just thinking what a nice li'll cat when I remembered my stick. So I looked up to see what cloud it was stuck in and wham, 6 inch stick slices into my left eye,hits my eye socket and bounces out.

As the blood started to poor I remembered, mom had said, don't move!! so I ran back in the house and stood where I'd been left, with my hand classped over my eye, didn't wanna get in trouble for moving.

Mom comes to the top of the stairs and I shouted "I didn't move mom!"

mom looks down at her innocent 4 year old boy, just where she'd left him, dressed in a nice sailor suit,............ eye half hanging out, farkin blood gushing out all down me clothes up the wall, on the stairs, like the worst drive by shooting horror zombie movie, crapping myself by now cause she may suspect I had moved. I may have got away with it had I not fainted and hit the banister with my head.

22 stitches in my eye and a week in hospital and the strange ability to look in two directions at once and I was still insisting my eye had just exploded whilst I was waiting like a good boy.

Sorry mom. x

[fatboyzed]

Wainuiomata bmx track had a decently high berm on the last corner with a water race behind it. Was dared by a mate to jump the water race. Got a good runup and went for it. No fear, and no brains with a crack in the frame just behind the stem = landing rather hard, and my bike in two halves, not to mention the pain that followed. Dad welded a full gusset into the frame after that with 3mm plate, the bike was dam heavy after that.

[skidMark]

Oooo ooo ooo....

Going down the driveway in my wooden go kart (no motor)

going rather quick as our driveway is downhill, turned really sharp and drifted. Oh crap (i'm about 12 at this point) i think i turned more or something i dunno, all i know is next thing i'm doing 20kph down the driveway backwards.

BANG

Mums Daihatsu Applause inherited a big dent in the drivers side rear door that day.

8 years later it became my car, dent was a reminder everytime i hopped in.

[Krayy]

Amateurs, the lot of ya...

(Names and locations changed to protect my ass)

My career as a smoker lasted for almost a whole month when I was around 11. We used to go into hiding to practice our art, and so that our mums wouldn't see us and one of the more favoured places to go for a fag (no, not THAT kind of fag) was in the flood drain tunnels in ****** that ran from ******** Park out towards ****** Rd (great place to go cycling, eeling and many other childhood activities).

So there we were sitting down for a smoke by the road tunnel next to ******* Park. The layout here is that there was a triangular area of grass and Eucalyptus trees flanked by ****** Rd on one side, the flood drain on another and the driveway to a Vehicle Testing Station on the other. There was also a Shell station at the corner of ****** Rd and the driveway.

Now my "mate" (c**t more like) decides it would be a good idea to see if the dry grass on the bank would light, so he does and it does, then he stamps it out and we all have a giggle. Then I have a turn and we stamp it out and have a giggle. Third times the charm then, and I honestly can't recall who lit it the third time, but f**k me if the grass doesn't go up like touch paper and it's all on.

As we were on a bank, the fire raced up the slope and into the wooded area. The Eucalyptus trees were full of oil and took off like Roman Candles, but luckily none exploded. Fire engines blared, fires blazed, the Shell station was evacuated in case of explosion and we were shitting ourselves in the highest order (crying too - hey, we were only 11)

Thank god the firemen were on the ball, as from what I recall only 1 or 2 cars got any heat damage and they got it before it jumped the driveway and set the garage, a wheel & tyre shop and the VTNZ ablaze

So we were off to one side, trying to keep away from the gaze of the firemen who were looking for a cause and then a schoolmate of ours came up and said he saw what we did and that he would tell if we didn't ply him with lunch monies etc for the next year or so. Needless to say, we had to bash him, and that was that. With no other witnesses, there was only our guilty consciences to remind us of that day that could have turned out a lot worse.

At least I never smoked again

[ynot slow]

As a 11 or 12yr old,was next door with neighbour and my brother,we were smashing an old box with hammers,I took an almighty back swing to hit the box,on the downward stroke the hammer stopped for a nao second as the claws embedded into my scull,thereby putting a gash which required several stitches.My brother and neighbour thought it seemed funny along with me till I saw my hand had a red substance which resembled blood,ran back to the neighbours home to freak her out,as mum was at work the neighbour took me to the quack,she thought it was an ideal excuse to flog the shit out of their GT Falcon,looking back that was the most fun,the ride.

Move on a few years later when in 20's,NZ stockcar teams champs in Palmy,drinking up after Fridays meeting basking in the knowledge that the scrappers had qualified,a few beers later with other like minded people from Hamilton and Wellington at the motel,we decided to go up town for a burger,on the way back with an urgent need to remove excess DB from bladder,I found a nice quiet alcove to releave the pressure,had only finished when bugger me the door opened beside me and a cop walks out,didn't think it was the cop shop,thought I was smart as was unseen from the street and cars passing,lucky though cop was good humoured.

[Kornholio]

The day I discovered petrol and matches was the day the old mans hair started turning grey and falling out....

So many stories but the one i remember most was my cousin from South Island was staying with us and always trying to outdo the southerners showed him how to make a flamethrower out of a mastitis syringe(a good 50ml) filled with petrol...squeeze a little out, set fire to end and let rip... would have been awesome in the trenches as a close combat weapon....sprayed in a big arc of flaming awesomeness and hosed down the side of the (full) haybarn... She'll be right it wont go through corrugated iron It didnt but went through where the sheets overlapped about a 1/3 of way into haybarn

Old man was milking and spotted me furiously grabbing buckets of water and trying to extinguish blaze... When he saw the smoke and shit i have never seen hay bales get thrown out of barn as fast as that day.... Burned around 50 out of 2000 so no big deal... Hid down the back of farm til 10pm that night and slinked back home to take the beating as I was hungry and cold and something was making a strange noise in the bush next to where I was hiding..............

Cousin thought I was awesome so it all worked out

[lb99]

The day I discovered petrol and matches was ....

:

f**k me if the grass doesn't go up like touch paper and it's all on.......
:

The reaction of flame + meths = Flamethrower

covering him in burning fuel......:

... it just sat there on the ground and exploded. ...

put kerosine in the toilet ...

Played with black powder ...

...petrol down a wasp nest and then throwing a match at it.

Luckily the house didn't burn down.....

......

...burnt fringe and cardy ...... hill side caught alight........nearly burn't my sister's house down.

.

... used petrol to start the fire....a sheet of flame

... blowing shit up......explosive-packed projectile launching cannon ......I covered the entire block in dense smoke. .....

.... KG of gelignite from farmers' trading, and made bombs....

Set fire to the neighbour's overgrown garden .........Almost set fire to the whole building..........

....throw it in the open fire .....fire guard caught the shower of embers and the house didn't burn down

......There have been many, very big, fires. .....spiked with spray cans and other exploding goodies. .......

-.....lighting a match inside .....Set fire to the hessian underneath the chair ...... she had a very short fuse my mum......

..... the glass on the fireplace was hot,!

......Vaccumed the ashes out of the fireplace ......

1) ...paint, meths & petrol .....flammable......firemen ..........volunteer fire brigade.....

.....explode, burning sign is showered everywhere, farmers field of maize catches fire, shearers quarters catch fire...

.....

anyone detect a pattern here?

[Drew]

anyone detect a pattern here?

Na, totally different. The flames are always different, so very different, and oddly arousing.

[Kornholio]

Na, totally different. The flames are always different, so very different, and oddly arousing.

True, there is never the same flame twice...extensive testing has proved this

[Drew]

True, there is never the same flame twice...extensive testing has proved this

I am undecided, I think I should light some more before I say never.

[Mike748]

Awesome thread! Makes me think I that it is inevitable that my son will end up doing these things too.

When I was 7 or 8 I was a short tempered red head and I remember:
a hammer and putting the claws into the back of my head.
a spade and almost chopping my little toe off.
some guy at school and T boneing him into the ditch with my bike.
fights
constantly walking out of school because the teacher annoyed me.

As I got a little older I moved on to:
Petrol, large plastic bags and matches.
Air rifles and putting flamables into the cocked compression chamber to give it more kick, lost accuracy but sounded like a .22
Stripping the radio aerial wire and putting it into the wall socket.

Ummm some other stuff that I best not say.

[awayatc]

Eventhough it wasn't me "Sir", I'd still like to share the following true event with you since it involved matches indeed......

In the late seventies The Dutch send a batalion to Lebanon for UN peacekeeping duties......
The UN headquarters in Nacura where on a hard and rocky soil, BUT What goes in one side has to come out the other end....,
So with a lot of effort longdrops where dug/blasted/ constructed to a considerable depth.
Before the 800 strong battalion rotated ater 6 months service,The substantial amount of shit was disposed of by a slow burning diesel fueled fire.
The new troops where hurriedly instructed about the ins and out of running the base, including the longdrop burnoff........

After another 6 month stint by the next lot, the soldier in charge of this unpleasant little detail lit a match and dropped it into the longdrop.....filled with a few cans of Petrol.......

What took 800 healthy young men 6 months to fill come out faster then you could say SHIT!
Unfortunately what goes up must come down.....prefabs and ragtop landrovers only offering temporary shelter from this major aerial assault....

It is alleged that the word "Diesel" may inadvertedly have been omitted from the handover notes........The new contingent ended up in one off the shittiest camps an army unit ever has been send into.......

[Skyryder]

I pissed on my dad's tomato plants thinking I was watering them. Those yogi's who drink thier rown piss are slowly killing themselves. The tomatoes died.

Ran away from home and got lost.

I once saw a fire eater so I thought I would try that. Got some benzine from the ol' mans shed. Wiped on the vasaline around the mouth took a 'good swig' of the benzine, lit up and blew, man that was a 'blast.' Some other stuff I'm not even going to mention..................not even after all these years.

Skyryder