Hope

[Skyryder]

Hope is the ultimate soul food. It nourishes and reinvigorates in the midst of the famine of despair. It provides light where all about is shadow and uncertainty. Hope is fed from within, and only requires faith for its fertilization and growth.

Skyryder

[Al]

Stay strong Shirley.
You are Ahu's best mate and that is so good!
You are both in our thoughts and prayers.

Al

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

I have tears rolling down my face - thank you all for your kind words, love and support. I have had the most awesome day.

I didn't sleep a wink last nite - I started planning for Ahu's funeral in a half hearted way - after my call to ICU at around 3.30am I think. I also thought I had better try and contact his family - who are that in name only. Don't know their names at all. I was advised by another Maori friend Peta, that they would come and take him back home - I advised he did not want that and wanted his ashes scattered over Karori Sanctuary - he helped build all the new tracks etc. After the way his family have hurt him - I wanted to say suck the kumera baby - but knew I had no right and I respect his culture too much. Ahu is a full blooded Maori and I could listen to him sing in his own language for hours. As said above, Let go, Let God.

Well I got a call from Peta and he had a woman friend beside him who knew Ahu's Aunt etc. I knew this woman and blanched cos I knew Ahu's distaste of her and I did not trust her - I was proven right - she rang ICU and lied - said she was whanau ya de ya. I had visions of the upcoming shit fight and thought - nope don't go there - it is so not going to happen.

Got to the hospital at 10.20am. Lovely blonde Nurse Kelly is on again I felt at ease.

Well I witnessed the most beautiful miracle today. If I had not seen it all unfolding before my eyes I would never have believed it.

Ahu's limbs were moving, his eyes would open briefly - he turned to me at the sound of my voice and opened his eyes fully - but lights on nobody's home - but hey progress. Then it was all on - no way was he having this tube stuck down his gob, his hands went up to his face, I had to use both hands to keep his arm down as did Kelly on the other side. Crikey this guy is strong. A few more developments and then Kelly said she could now take out the tube - wow he was beginning to resemble the Ahu I knew. His boss arrived. I had a break and came back to find Ahu sitting up in bed and Kelly was trying to feed him yoghurt - I burst out laughing and said good luck - Ahu put his hand to his face and wiped it away - he was having none of that crap in his mouth, a good sign of recovery.

All was going well until Ahu decided he wanted to get out of bed - now the lights were on but still nobody home - If Luke had not been there to help restrain him, Ahu would have succeeded in his mission - Kelly had to call out for help - she couldn't get to the emergency button - and she said she needed sedation drugs quickly. Then Ahu spoke "Fuck" then "Fuck" again. Ok that's great he has speech lol. A steady stream of visitors - and a lot of love surrounding him - it was - to use a word he loves - "awesome".

This guy has done so much for so many people and done it quietly with no fanfare - it is not until something like this happens and everyone of those people came to visit him - that you realised the capacity of this guy's giving. Funnily enough the word "stubborn" kept cropping up when describing Ahu.

Yesterday I had gone thru Ahu's phone and left a message asking them to contact me, and what connection they had with Ahu = friend or relation - cos I did not know names of his brothers and sisters. I was lucky that one was his ex wife and what a wonderful lady she is. They remain good friends and she had so many positive things to say about him - a great tribute to them both and I actually don't know how to describe how I feel - I think it is awe, humility, respect.

I am totally exhausted and the brain is shutting down - the breathing tube had to go back in and they had to sedate him so that his brain could rest and heal and immobilise him so that he couldn't get out of bed - he made a couple of more attempts so up went the amount of sedation drug. Now I'm the one with lights on nobody's home. But I can rest easy tonite - I have written only a small portion of the many wonderful things that happened today and the txt msgs from various people wanting to know how Ahu was.

Ahu is a true warrior (sp?) The next couple of days will show us if he has brain damage or not - whether he makes a full recovery and walks out of there - we believe he will - but we will cross those bridges as we come to them.

Kelly is the most amazing Nurse, patient, understanding of family/friend dynamics, cheerful and explained things in great detail to me. I thanked her tonite for all she had done - gnite

[riffer]

Bloody hell, that's one hell of a rollercoaster ride you and Ahu have both been on the last few days!

Best wishes to you both Shirley.

[discotex]

I hope there's a lot more good news to come. Must be heart wrenching BMW.

[ynot slow]

Unreal is just a word,never give up another.Friend is another but bloody marvelous you rock sums it up.

[Mrs Busa Pete]

That's great new's shirl hope all is still going well. Are you looking after yourself as well though

[vifferman]

Let's hope and pray that the oxygen deprivation hasn't caused major irreparable damage to Ahu's brain - that might be more tragic than if he'd passed away. Sounds like he's a battler though, so let's hope for the best and that he continues to improve.

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

I do believe in miracles and I have witnessed one this week. Ahu has made a full recovery, apart from a bad memory but drs say his brains will unscramble over the next week. I nearly said he'd didn't have any before this so that will be a bonus. lol

At 6.30AM this morning - the phone woke me - it doesn't normally - I was dead to the world then I hear this "Hi Shirl, its Ahu, haven't seen you for ages, guess where I am - in hospital" Crikey I wondered what planet I was on. I said "Yes dear I know I've been with you nite and day for the last 3 days". Yeah??? he said. Anyway come and see me now Shirl.

I'm sure I was sleep walking - got us some real coffees and went to see him. He was looking bright and cheerful and his old self. All he remembers is having a sharp pain and that is that. I soon realised his memory was stuffed. I'd probably been there 10 mins and he said "I want to go home now". That comment was repeated so many times during the day.

It has been a hard day for him - the shock, the emotional side of it. He's a very proud and private man, and the most important thing is for him to know he's not going to go thru this alone, he hates being powerless and out of control. I think we all have that in us at times.

They close the ward between 2 and 4pm - I was able to go have a nanny nap at his place - he lives next door to the hospital lol. If I hadn't set the alarm I probably would have slept thru to the morning.

Crikey going from Intensive Care to a Ward is like going from a 5 start hotel to a Backpackers. No disrespect to the staff in the ward but in ICU he has his own Nurse 24 hours a day. In the ward the Nurse has to look after many patients and simply they don't have enough nurses on.

His meals would arrive, so I had to pull his bed up so he could eat. Find a nurse so he could have pain relief - and other things when one is not allowed out of bed. I reckon Nurses are the most hard-done by profession there is. Totally underpaid and overworked and have the responsibility of life on their hands.

And hospital food is shite. So I walked up to the shops and got him some real food. Tomorrow I am making sandwiches and taking them with me.

I finally left about 7.30pm tonite. I hated leaving him there I gotta admit. I know what it is like to be on your own and you have a major sickness calamity and everything is so unknown.

Ahu has thanked me for supporting him - many times today. I reminded him of our friendship - where there have been times we have not spoken to each other for some months - one of us has had a hissy fit and both of us can be stubborn lol yet we have always got back in contact with each other and grown from there. That is life.

I know the next few weeks are not going to be easy for him. But he will get thru - he's a fighter.

The events of the last week have certainly enriched my life and taken my mind off my own problems. I am on new meds for my condition and they are working well. And I will get more sleep now that he is in the ward.

The doctors and nurses are amazed he even pulled through and so quickly. The hard work will now follow.

[ManDownUnder]

Hey Shirley... here's FUCKEN GREAT HUG for you! ha HAAAAAAA!!!!

I don't know Ahu but I do know loyalty and friendship when I see it. Stay strong. You really are inspiring.

[Curious_AJ]

man, sounds a lot like what happened to my dad... I was 7 at the time and have a patchy memory (and wasnst allowed in ICU) but yeah a lot of it rings true for what was told to me by my family that was allowed in.

great that he's on the mend!

<3 love

[ajturbo]

hey shirl..

i'm home...
if you need anything...call!!!

[MyGSXF:Me]

Awesome news hun!!!!

[vifferman]

Fantastic news!

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

The guy's a legend. He does not have brain damage at all - just no memory at present - but drs say that his brains will unscramble within a week or two. Got there yesterday morning and his bag was packed - I don't know how many times I have unpacked his bag lol. "I'm going home now". He cannot remember why he is there. Now he wants a cigarette - they put a patch on him yesterday - it was off within 5 minutes - I found it later and put it back on.

I went to his place for the nite at 8.00pm did his washing and in that half hour the hospital had rung and asked me to return - he was a little upset.

Fark a little upset - he'd had a major hissy fit. Pulled the canula out of his arm, all the cords monitoring his heart, anything in site hit the deck and he had his shoes on, shorts and no shirt and was on his way out when my back up friend arrived - I got there 10 mins later. He calmed down once we told him again why he was there.

He had a very emotional day, and then you can laugh and joke with him. Last nite when I was called in I said Please can I take him home - its just 3 minutes away - he lives in the hospital hostel. But it is too dangerous - they have to find out exactly why his heart did what it did. It is heartbreaking seeing him at the window staring out - I want to go home. He really is the patient from hell.

They brought in a minder for him - but no way - he begged me to stay - apparently I could share his hospital bed - yeah right I'm no liteweight, then he said he would sleep in the chair and I have his bed. However they brought me a lazi-boy chair which was pretty stuffed. I was overtired and barely slept.

Today I am taking time out and sleeping and he is having visitors. Tonite I may have to stay with him but will wait and see.

He told the friends last nite = Shirley brought me here in for tests, I don't know why - and she's left me here. Lol.

Roll on end of the week and his tests are all over.