Why men cheat.

**Finn** · 12th February 2009, 12:22

Originally Posted by Trudes

Please remove your tongue from my arse.

See, now I KNOW you're just trying to humor me.

Stop flirting with Jrandom. An innocent exchange of subtleties can often lead to rampant sex.

Originally Posted by Trudes

Actually, I think he's afraid of me.

Fear and respect.

I just hope for your sake that he doesn't find a women that he's not afraid of.

**jrandom** · 12th February 2009, 12:24

Originally Posted by Finn

An innocent exchange of subtleties can often lead to rampant sex.

Oh my. Rampant is my favourite.

Originally Posted by Finn

I just hope for your sake that he doesn't find a women that he's not afraid of.

Finn makes a very good point.

**MSTRS:Me** · 12th February 2009, 12:25

Originally Posted by Trudes

Fear and respect.

No, the two chief weapons and "fear and surprise". Don't you know your Spanish Inquisition?r

**Trudes** · 12th February 2009, 12:26

Originally Posted by Finn

I just hope for your sake that he doesn't find a women that he's not afraid of.

It was a joke, but he has balls enough that if he's ever not happy with things as they are, he can either try to fix it or find the door. Goes both ways, and we know it.

**Trudes** · 12th February 2009, 12:27

Originally Posted by MSTRS

No, the two chief weapons and "fear and surprise". Don't you know your Spanish Inquisition?r

No I don't, but I think I like it!!

**ManDownUnder** · 12th February 2009, 12:33

Originally Posted by MotoGirl

I don't understand how a man could interpret a lack of sex to mean he is unappreciated.

Each to their own. People feel valued in different ways, and it's only when the expressions of value are in the form the recipient appreciates they are really seen for what they are.

If you personally valued your dog being groomed really highly but hated the workload... someone could that for you as a genuine expression of love. THEY wouldn't necessarily understand it or relate to as such... but if it makes you feel loved then it's 'right'.

As a generalisation, frequency of sex for a man is an indication of being loved. Try it. I you're a once a week couple and the female bumps it up to twice a week, and initiates it... watch the difference it makes (generally...). He'll have a spring in his step, do the dishes, be happier and full of energy.

And lurching from one tangent to another... looking at why men cheat is one thing - looking at who they cheat with... is another...

**Skyryder** · 12th February 2009, 12:47

Originally Posted by Winston001

Yeeessss.........NO.

The distant human ancestors (australiopithicus afarensis) branched off about 3.5 million years ago. From our perspective they were animals and driven by primal instincts. The only rules were the few required to co-operate as a small social group.

It isn't until speech developed a mere 40,000 years ago that humans gained the ability to communicate complex ideas. Such as stay with me and stop looking at that slut!

Groups grew into tribes, which evolved rules = laws. Speech also allowed abstract ideas such as morals to develop. Morals are disparaged in today's me-first society but they are important. They put the brakes on purely instinctive behaviour. We don't steal stuff even though it's easier than working. And rape isn't acceptable - unless the babysitter is really begging for it.....

The point is - each of us has primal genetic instincts which have existed for 3.5 million years and a mere 10,000 years of civilisation doesn't wipe those instincts out.

No matter what kind of biological excuses that can be used for why men cheat, as Finn says when woman do it they are a slut. This either makes a mockery of the biological reasoning behind the male excuses or simply that those that use these excuses (biological) do so in order to convince themselves that they still have honour integrity and self discilpine. It's the macho way of blaming something else for their actions, and in this case it's still the female 'mother' nature who is at fault.

Skyryder

**Clockwork** · 12th February 2009, 13:25

So.... you find your love, you exchange your vows, and then, if the physical side of the relationship fails the only honourable thing left to do is cross your legs and become celibate or execute an honourable divorce and trash pretty much everything else of meaning in your life? Bit of a hobson's choice.

And should you find that celibacy is not for you maybe you could be open and honest about your exploits, that may ease your conscience but its hardly going to make your partner feel better is it?

**MSTRS:Me** · 12th February 2009, 14:02

Originally Posted by Clockwork

And should you find that celibacy is not for you maybe you could be open and honest about your exploits, that may ease your conscience but its hardly going to make your partner feel better is it?

There's honesty. And then there's foolishness. Better to not stray in the first place.

**Maha** · 12th February 2009, 14:07

Originally Posted by Trudes

Yada Yada.....

How you doin'???......

**Sully60** · 12th February 2009, 14:08

Originally Posted by Maha

How you doin'???......

Are you a mormon? Has the UEB sanctioned this advance?

**Finn** · 12th February 2009, 14:10

Originally Posted by jrandom

Finn makes a very good point.

It gets me into a bit of trouble from time to time.

**Curious_AJ** · 12th February 2009, 14:36

I heard something similar to this topic on the radio again... very good points that the people make actually.

**Dave Lobster** · 12th February 2009, 14:38

Originally Posted by Winston001

To understand this - Evolutionary Psychology - you have to remember that for most of our 1.5 million years, we lived in tribes and our animal instincts were primary.

WTF?? Isn't the world only 4000 years old??