BOY RACERS - have I discovered the truth?

**AllanB** · 3rd March 2009, 17:03

Boy Racers – much has been said about these youths, however after much thought I have come to the conclusion that they may all have closet homosexual tendencies – whether they be aware of it or not.

I do not proclaim to be an expert on these matters, indeed I know very little of the homosexuals world other than what I have seen on TV, however I have listened to the occasional Wham song.

I would ask you to consider the following points and welcome your comments:

1. BR’s tend to meet in groups in poorly lit car-parks, street corners etc. Have these areas become the new ‘men’s toilets’?

2. Once more than two BR’s gather in these dark areas they immediately open their bonnets. I believe this opening of the bonnet has a phallic link – they are effectively saying to other BR’s ‘look at me, I’m erect and open to inspection’

3. After a BR opens his bonnet, he is often seen making a display of his buttocks by bending over the engine bay. Low-slung jeans and boxers have become part of the BR dress code to aid the display of butt crack. The displaying of buttocks in this manner is a widely accepted part of the matting ritual in the animal world; in this case they attract additional male BR’s.

4. Large bore exhausts – there’s fairly obvious anal links here with such a large noisy hole being at the rear of the vehicle. Again these are proudly displayed for following BR’s to see.

5. Tinted windows – I have often noticed numerous BR’s getting into a single vehicle. Just what goes on in these cars when the doors are closed?

6. Caps on backwards. WTF is it with this look - it cannot be a fashion statement, as it looks stupid, so I conclude it must be functional. This stumped me for some time until it dawned on me that you could not give a decent blowjob wearing a cap with the peak forward. Reverse the peak and…well…’bobs’ your uncle.

7. Finally, and quite conclusively I believe, if I sit at the lights in my little 1500cc car next to a BR and start to rev up my engine they usually respond by giving me a ‘wanking’ type of sign with their hands. Now I understand that despite being considerably older than the average BR, I am an attractive example of maleness – obviously these young BR’s think so as they make their desires to preform a lewd act on me clear with their gesturing.

**thehollowmen** · 3rd March 2009, 17:07

You had me in stitches, I need to spread some love around before I give you more bling.

**ducatilover** · 3rd March 2009, 17:12

dont post too loudly allan, they will find you. you will become a cap wearer. have you noticed the satisfied looking ones arent wearing hats? hmmmm

**twotyred** · 3rd March 2009, 17:13

truth is stranger than fiction (or comedy)

**R6_kid:Me** · 3rd March 2009, 17:18

I think you are full of yourself, and in fact, a closet homosexual.

**3umph** · 3rd March 2009, 17:24

now that puts a different perspective on the BR culture

**FJRider** · 3rd March 2009, 17:34

If anybody knows anything on who has...or is inclined to... homosexual tendencies, that would be a honda rider. Well done that ... man ???

**JMemonic** · 3rd March 2009, 18:07

Originally Posted by R6_kid

I think you are full of yourself, and in fact, a closet homosexual.

Someone pee on your weetbix?

**The Baron** · 3rd March 2009, 18:51

I will never look at someone with a cap on backwards the same again.

**Patrick** · 3rd March 2009, 19:34

Whats with "F.T.P" on these BR cars???

Who cares if you have a Fucken Tiny Penis...

**peasea** · 3rd March 2009, 20:34

Originally Posted by Patrick

Whats with "F.T.P" on these BR cars???

Who cares if you have a Fucken Tiny Penis...

I thought it was "Fuck The Pigs" or "Friendly Thpeshul Person" or something. Possibly "Fuckin Thing's Poked", especially if the car is an import with a wound-back speedo.

I love our V8. Cant wait to "Feel Throttle Pressure" on Saturday. Yee har.

**peasea** · 3rd March 2009, 20:37

Originally Posted by The Baron

I will never look at someone with a cap on backwards the same again.

So; what you're saying is that you'll turn your cap back around to face the front before looking at someone in a similar fashion?

Or am I twisting your words?

**nallac** · 3rd March 2009, 20:42

so,you are saying boyracers and Honda riders have a lot in common...

**McJim** · 3rd March 2009, 20:47

Apparently the government is working on a bail out package for a lot of boy racers. the cause of this is "leaky car syndrome" possibly caused by shoddy modification work by contractors who, invariably, are out of business or too shonky to be found.

Cars with "leaky car syndrom" can be easily identified however as their occupants can be seen inside the car with their hoods up. It must be because of the leaks coz putting a hood up indoors in any other situation identifies the hoody wearer as a bit of a wank stain.