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Thread: Beer & Footy anyone?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    21st September 2005 - 22:00
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    Beer & Footy anyone?

    AS A WOMAN PASSES HER DAUGHTER'S CLOSED BEDROOM
    DOOR, SHE HEARD A STRANGE BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM WITHIN.

    OPENING THE DOOR, SHE OBSERVED HER DAUGHTER GIVING HERSELF A REAL WORKOUT WITH A VIBRATOR.
    SHOCKED, SHE ASKED:"WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING?"
    THE DAUGHTER REPLIED: "MOM, I'M THIRTY-FIVE YEARS OLD,
    UNMARRIED, AND THIS THING IS ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND. PLEASE, GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE."

    THE NEXT DAY, THE GIRL'S FATHER HEARD THE SAME BUZZ COMING FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CLOSED BEDROOM DOOR. UPON ENTERING THE ROOM, HE OBSERVED HIS DAUGHTER MAKING PASSIONATE LOVE TO HER VIBRATOR.
    TO HIS QUERY AS TO WHAT SHE WAS DOING, THE DAUGHTER SAID: "DAD I'M THIRTY-FIVE, UNMARRIED, AND THIS THING IS ABOUT AS CLOSE AS I'LL EVER GET TO A HUSBAND. PLEASE, GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE."

    A COUPLE DAYS LATER, THE WIFE CAME HOME FROM A SHOPPING TRIP, PLACED THE GROCERIES ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER, AND HEARD THAT BUZZING NOISE COMING FROM, OF ALL PLACES, THE LIVING ROOM.
    SHE ENTERED THAT AREA AND OBSERVED HER HUSBAND SITTING ON THE COUCH, DOWNING A COLD BEER, AND STARING AT THE TV.THE VIBRATOR WAS NEXT TO HIM ON THE COUCH, BUZZING LIKE CRAZY.

    THE WIFE ASKED: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"
    THE HUSBAND REPLIED:











































    "I'M WATCHING FOOTBALL WITH MY SON-IN-LAW."
    NO Feelin' like 2-WHEELIN'!

  2. #2
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    7th November 2008 - 13:30
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    The Vibrator

    THE VIBRATOR

    As a woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom Door, she heard a strange
    buzzing noise coming from Within. Opening the door, she observed her
    daughter With a vibrator.

    Shocked, she asked: 'what in the world are you Doing?'

    The daughter replied: 'mom, I'm thirty-five years Old, unmarried, and this
    thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and
    Leave me alone.'

    The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz Coming from the other
    side of the closed bedroom Door. Upon entering the room, he observed his
    Daughter making passionate love to her vibrator.

    To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter Said: 'dad I'm
    thirty-five, unmarried, and this Thing is about as close as I'll ever get to
    a Husband. Please, go away and leave me alone.'

    A couple days later, the wife came home from a Shopping trip , Placed the
    groceries on the kitchen Counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from,
    Of all places, the living room. She entered that Area and observed her
    husband sitting on the couch, Downing a cold beer, and staring at the TV.

    The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing Like crazy. The wife
    asked: 'What the f... Are you doing?'

    The husband replied: 'I'm watching football with my Son-in-law.'

  3. #3
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    31st March 2003 - 13:09
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    I'm guessing the Son in Law's name is Bob?
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

  4. #4
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    "You must spread the...etc etc etc"

    That's very good crazyhorse...
    . “No pleasure is worth giving up for two more years in a rest home.” Kingsley Amis

  5. #5
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    14th July 2006 - 21:39
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    Quote Originally Posted by ManDownUnder View Post
    I'm guessing the Son in Law's name is Bob?
    And he comes from downunder.....

  6. #6
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    28th August 2005 - 19:37
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    Quote Originally Posted by ManDownUnder View Post
    I'm guessing the Son in Law's name is Bob?
    Naaaa - Richard!!!
    Suck, Squeeze, Bang, Blow aren’t just the 4 cycles of an engine

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by nadroj View Post
    Naaaa - Richard!!!
    But I hear the name humming in my ear...
    ....BOB....
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

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