There were two nuns..

**Nasty** · 5th April 2009, 08:09

One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),

and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL) .

It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for
the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.

SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.

SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes
at the most! What can we do?

SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.

SM: It's not working.

SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only
logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.

SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.

So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.

Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is
worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.

Then Sister Logical arrives.

SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here!
Tell me what happened!

SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me

SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?

SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run
as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.

SM: And?

SL : The only logical thing happened. He reached me.

SM : Oh, dear! What did you do?

SL : The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

SM : Oh, Sister! What did the man do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

SM: Oh, no! What happened then?

SL : Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down.

And for those of you who thought it would be dirty,

Say two Hail Marys!

**Number One** · 5th April 2009, 08:21

hail mary hail mary

**awayatc** · 5th April 2009, 08:44

2 nuns (wishfull and hopefull) bought a car at a secondhand caryard.
After 10 minutes or so, the nuns where still sitting in their newly purchased vehicle, and hadn't moved an inch.
So the sales person walks over and asks what's wrong ladies?.....
Well , says one nun, we were told that if you buy a car at your yard you will be Fucked...............

**mdnzz** · 5th April 2009, 09:49

Two nuns run out of gas not far from the local village and decided to walk and get some fuel.
The local garage had no containers to put the fuel in other than an old piss pot.

The nuns didn't mind, so they carried their fuel back to their car and starting to fill their car up when another car drove past slowly.

The driver of the car leaned out his window, smiled and said "Sisters I just gotta admire your faith".

**mdnzz** · 5th April 2009, 10:04

A guy is driving down a old highway when he sees a sign ahead saying
"$50 and you can be screwed the the Sister's of Mercy
5 miles on the right look for the convent."

He thinks yea right bit of a joke, yet further up the road another sign.

"Sister's of Mercy Convent, get screwed for $50, 1 mile on the right."

Now he's thinking hmm I've never had sex with a nun bet that got to be interesting.

Mile up the road there is a big flashing neon sign saying,
"Welcome to the Sister's Of Mercy Convent".

He parks and goes in where hes sees some of the most gorgeous women all wearing their nun gear. He goes up to the desk and says to the older nun "I'd like to be screwed please, here's my $50."

She thanks him and directs him to a sign above the door behind her,
"please enter here to be screwed by the sisters of mercy".

He smile and enters a hallway and the door closes behind him. He see's another sign again saying "please enter here to be screwed by the sisters of mercy".

He goes through that door only to find another door with a sign saying "through this door and you will be screwed by the sisters of mercy".
he finds himself in another hallway with another door and again the sign "through this door and you will be screwed by the sisters of mercy".

This goes on for several doors until finally a different sign he sees " through this door and you will finally be screwed by the sisters of mercy"

He goes through only to find himself in the carpark in front of a sign saying,

"there ya go you have just been screwed by the sisters of mercy"

**McJim** · 5th April 2009, 10:47

Four nuns arrive at the pearly gates.
St Peter asks the first nun "Are you free of sin?"
She replies "Well I once looked with desire upon a mans penis"
"bathe your eyes in the holy water fountain and your sin shall be forgiven" says St Peter indicating the small fountain before the gates.
St Peter asks the second nun "Are you free of sin?"
"I once touched a man's penis"
"Bathe your hands in the fountain for absolution"
There is then a commotion as the fourth nun tries to barge through to the front
St Peter exclaims "What is going on here?"
The fourth nun says "I want to wash my mouth out before Sister Sarah sticks her arse in the fountain!"