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Thread: Swine flu...

  1. 28th April 2009, 19:25 #1
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    Swine flu...

    I'm sweating like a pig today.....oh fuck....



    Following on from fears over the swine flu virus it has been revealed that New Zealand will not be affected!!
    Apparently the Government will not be letting it in, in case it will offend MUSLIMS!!



    Apparently the symptoms of swine flu are; sweating, excessive body odour and laziness.
    No wonder it went unnoticed for so long in Mexico.



    Can you get oinkment for it?



    Is making puns about a pandemic a bit near the knuckle? Do you have to draw a loin somewhere?



    Millions of birds were slaughtered when we had an outbreak of Avian Flu.
    Millions of pigs will have to be slaughtered now because of this Swine Flu.
    What will happen if we have another outbreak of Asian Flu?
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  2. 28th April 2009, 20:13 #2
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    Ha ha,Hey Swoop I've never heard so much Hogwash you swine..

    What do you call a pig that took a plane?... Swine flu!
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  3. 28th April 2009, 20:16 #3
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    Wasn't worried about Bird Flu - doesn't effect blokes right?

    I have been accused of being a pig so watching this Swine Flu.
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  4. 28th April 2009, 20:19 #4
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    If you start rutting like crazy then you may well have it.

    Apparently pigs have a doodle that is like a corkscrew. It's possible that this is where the term 'screwing ' came from?

    Tattooist often practice their trade on pig skin - it is the closest to human skin.

    Parts of pigs can be transplanted into humans (no not their dicks).

    George Cloonie had a pet pig.
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  5. 29th April 2009, 11:45 #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by dasser View Post
    Ha ha,Hey Swoop I've never heard so much Hogwash you swine..
    Swine flu is not a problem for the pigs, because they're all going to be cured anyway.

    The first sign of pig flu is that you come out in nasty rashers.


    Did you hear about the gay Jewish pirate? He couldn't handle a pork sword...
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  6. 29th April 2009, 12:13 #6
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    Great morning laugh all posters...oink oink!!
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  7. 29th April 2009, 12:42 #7
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    Nice one eveybody,

    I took some Lemsip, reckon it saved my bacon

    Dont know about getting swine flu but I got a nasty dose of the clap off of some pig I met in South London many years ago
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  8. 4th May 2009, 09:39 #8
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    A pig flu?
    I thought that was impossible.
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  9. 4th May 2009, 10:49 #9
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    This one made me laugh.....
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version.  Name: swineflu2.jpg  Views: 15  Size: 36.0 KB  ID: 128363  
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  10. 4th May 2009, 11:13 #10
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    The Aporkalypse.
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  11. 4th May 2009, 11:24 #11
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    I tried to get through on the Swine Flu 0800 number...but all I got was crackling...
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  12. 4th May 2009, 11:27 #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Swoop View Post
    Following on from fears over the swine flu virus it has been revealed that New Zealand will not be affected!!
    Apparently the Government will not be letting it in, in case it will offend MUSLIMS!!
    Why bother? It's not like they won't find something else to be offended about!
    It is preferential to refrain from the utilisation of grandiose verbiage in the circumstance that your intellectualisation can be expressed using comparatively simplistic lexicological entities. (...such as the word fuck.)

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  13. 5th May 2009, 08:59 #13
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    The 7 dwarfs regretted failing to see the signs, as Sneezy eventually died from swine flu.
    TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”
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