Suggested punishments for a theif...

[ManDownUnder]

So..... you want a BJ or BJ?

To be fair - I like them both - just not one from the other if that makes sense...

[Sniper]

Really? Ok, I wanted to make the first KB porn vid starring you two

[Eurygnomes]

Yeah - the poor little bugger has been shafted at every turn, and I'd love to get him inspired with something - ANYTHING. He's putting in the hard yards now, knows he did bad and wants to fix that up... I want to ensure he maintains that opinion.

It can also give you and the world at large the ammo to destroy you.

Not to mention your Karma points eh MDU?!

Just kidding - I think you did the right thing. From the start it didn't seem like he was your ordinary thug - using trademe as a source of funding does require a degree of capability after all. So I'm glad that he's doing something proactive (the dairy farming) though I still worry about the lack of family.

I know martial arts were my family for a long time (plus, teaching me sneaky ways to look after myself) and our sensei was a dairy farmer so I wonder if he coudl fit that in. I find that in any situation, if someone you respect is teaching you how to maximise your inner and outer strength, you develop into a family unit all of your own, borrowed though it may be (even when one of your siblings then takes your knee out completely!).

Just ideas for hte future...I hope you stay involved MDU.

[ManDownUnder]

I know martial arts were my family for a long time (plus, teaching me sneaky ways to look after myself) and our sensei was a dairy farmer so I wonder if he coudl fit that in. I find that in any situation, if someone you respect is teaching you how to maximise your inner and outer strength, you develop into a family unit all of your own, borrowed though it may be (even when one of your siblings then takes your knee out completely!).

Hey awesome - thanks for that... I'd never have thought of that one!

MDU

[Zed]

Well it seems you proved me wrong when I said "justice wouldn't be served and this thief learning his lesson and coming clean is very very slim!" MDU. Well done.

One of the greatest blessings is to see someones life change for the better!

Often the criminal life is a sad story and the result of a broken home. Loosing ones parents and being rejected totally is very sad, yet in no way an excuse for thievery.

I'm glad you feel victorious MDU! http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/im...ilies/clap.gif

[sir.pratt]

At the risk of this turning into another Scottish thread (and I know you're a cuddly soft big pussy, really, Jim... and the rest a yas, too...!) but...

has anyone here read Jimmy Boyle's autobiography, 'A Sense Of Freedom'?
He was considered the 'Most Dangerous Man In Britain' (a real Glasgow hard man in the old tradition) and is now an award-winning artist.
He spent most of his life in the system, from Borstal at a really young age- like 11 or something - right up until his mid 30s. What changed?

They put him in an experimental wing. It wasn't a soft arse option by any means; but they started to challenge their behaviour (from memory, read this ages ago) and treat them like humans. It worked for him: the kick arse option didn't. Obviously there was more to it than that, so read the book. It's really interesting.

There will always be exceptions to the rule- whichever rule you like to think of. I hate folk using the system to get a soft ride, too; it helps no-one, least of themselves- which is why you need wily people watching that they don't.

Anyway, what was I saying?

Oh, yes: aaargh! Och nooo.... it's no me, it's ma heid....
Grrrochmacuddoch ya wee hoor...

Comparing 15 year old losers to Jimmy Boyle though is a bit of a leap of faith. These are not hardened criminals here - just dickheads with no respect for other people's property or rights, most of who need a bloody good slapping, cause it's all they understand.

[idb]

You know what really pisses me off?
I don't care, I'm gonna tell you anyway!

When you work up into latherous, self righteous anger about some total wanker....and then he turns out to be OK, or deserving of some kind of understanding.
Aaaargh, I hate that!
If someone's a fuckwit, why can't they just stay that way!!!!

Anyway, well done MDU. It's very easy for folks like me to inhabit our cosy middle-class world, railing at the low-life all around us, completely ignorant of the circumstances that they have come from. Worse, not wanting to know about them, judging them on our own standards and experience.

This would have to be the most educational and uplifting thread I've seen on this forum.

Excuse me, I'm having a moment.

I just know I'll be embarrassed about this incoherent post in the morning............where's my therapist......

[Skyryder]

MDU, I know exactly how you feel. My wife won her very first auction (5 x paperback books) on TradeMe over a month ago and I paid the seller $51 immediately. Like you she got stung and the goods never arrived despite the seller emailing twice saying that the money had showed in the bank and that the parcel was on its way. Since then this seller has ripped off six other traders and has subsequently had his membership suspended, etc.

To cut a long story short, I did consider taking further action against the 'perp' but decided not to because it is "buyer beware" after all (and it wasn't a huge amount) and the reality of justice being served and this thief learning his lesson and coming clean is very very slim! Hope it goes well for you and you prove me wrong!


Zed

That's precisely why they get away with it. Guys like you let your self get ripped off then make excuses why you do nothing about it.


Skyryder

[Skyryder]

Family conferences are a wast of time. Any remorse is not for the crime but getting caught. If you want to front up then go for it. All you'll get is a lot of sympathy 'from the system,' how much 'good' the little shit has in him. Things like 'he's not a bad lad at heart etc, and he knows better and their is a lot of potential in him. All this waffle is designed to mollify yourself. I kid you not. There will be social workers, counsellors, his support person etc. It's nothing but a crock.

My advice is to write a letter and speak you mind. Send it to the social worker and say that it is to be read aloud.

Failing that front up and break his nose.


Skyryder

[Skyryder]

Often the criminal life is a sad story and the result of a broken home. Loosing ones parents and being rejected totally is very sad, yet in no way an excuse for thievery.

Then why make excuses for them.

Skyryder

[Ms Piggy]

Thanks MDU - it's really interesting to hear your comments regarding the FGC process. It's great that you are so keen to help him too.

The social worker in me would say that his story is possibly that of a lot of young people that have committed crime similar or worse and society at large is so willing to react before knowing the story behind their actions. (watch me get flamed for this!!)

[jazbug5]

Comparing 15 year old losers to Jimmy Boyle though is a bit of a leap of faith. These are not hardened criminals here - just dickheads with no respect for other people's property or rights, most of who need a bloody good slapping, cause it's all they understand.

*sigh*

The whole point is, read the book. How do you think he got that way?

I now work in a police station; we get the kids coming through our doors as little tinies with cigarette burns on their faces and no food in their bellies. Everyone knows that they'll be seeing them again in all likelihood when they start getting arrested for 'disrespecting other peoples property/rights'. Who is teaching these kids the reciprocal nature of respect?
It isn't the people knocking seven kinds of sh*t out of them and not feeding them...

If anything, the last three weeks have reinforced my original views, and made me more determined to work with kids professionally to try to help them learn what they may not be learning otherwise.

Go ahead. Say something constructive.

[Eurygnomes]

It totally breaks my heart to see really smart kids, maltreated during their childhood such that they 'turn to the dark side', though I see the painful inevitability as well. I know I started off down that track, and I consider myself very lucky to have received some decent parenting (stern but fair etc, I was smacked and I think my parents were correct in most occasions).

And some of my most intelligent friends have unfortunately gone down the 'wrong' side - so far not being caught (bodily or emotionally) too badly, but I always wonder when the net will tighten around their hearts and heads. :|

So good on you all people who work with the disenfranchised and abused children!