Best joke yet.

[unhingedlizard]

Two parrots are sat on a perch, one turns to the other and says:







Can you smell fish?

[MSTRS]

:puke: :puke: :no: You have too much spare time.:whistle:

[Wolf]

Two parrots are sat on a perch, one turns to the other and says:







Can you smell fish?
Carping on again, huh? Did you post that just for the halibut?

[Hitcher]

After reading that I'm praying that Cod will save my sole...

[scumdog]

You guys just bream with humour, you certainly have earned your plaice on this thread, no rudd jokes though.

[MSTRS]

Koi you lot, eel be floundering. Whale oil be off now.

[Flyingpony]

I just don't get it. Been thinking about it for a couple days.
What's this joke about?

[MSTRS]

I just don't get it. Been thinking about it for a couple days.
What's this joke about?
Nobody tell him

[Hitcher]

I just don't get it. Been thinking about it for a couple days.
What's this joke about?
Two fish in a tank. One says "I'll drive, you look after the gun".


This baby seal walks into a club...


Two nuns in the bath. One says "Where's the soap?" The other one says "Yes its does, doesn't it!"

[curious george]

Two nuns in the bath. One says "Where's the soap?" The other one says "Yes its does, doesn't it!"
I never did get that one.... just as well? :no:

[Hooks]

I'd say you could all get forked but that wouldn't be very knife ..... :devil2:

[placidfemme]

*doesn't get it* :(

[Gremlin]

*doesn't get it* :(
do you really want to??? If you look at it nicely, you are obviously too busy to waste time with crap like that...

then again, you posted a reply...

shit, I did too... :oi-grr:

[placidfemme]

*gets it now*

*after having it explained to me*

[unhingedlizard]

*gets it now*

*after having it explained to me*


Oh dear..Having a blonde moment are we?

[placidfemme]

lol yeah kinda...

But then again I don't eat fish... or seafood.... or shellfish...

So I wouldn't know what they are all called anyway...

[Sniper]

I still never got the joke?????

[crazylittleshit]

This baby seal walks into a club...
"
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: hA HA HA AH AHA AHA AHA

[crazylittleshit]

why did the boy fall off his bike?
he had no arms
why did the boy fall off his bike?
he had no legs
why did the boy fall off his bike?
his grandmother through a brick at him. :rofl: :rofl:

what's large white and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you?

A FRIDGE.. :whocares:

[unhingedlizard]

I still never got the joke?????

A perch is what a parrot sits on, a perch is also a type of fish.

How did the worlds crappest joke get so many replies?

[WRT]

This baby seal walks into a club...


Same baby seal walks into a bar, and asks the bartender for a canadian club on the rocks . . .

[Wolf]

Two blondes walked into a bar - you'd think one of them would've seen it.

[WRT]

Two blondes were walking down the street when they came across some tracks. Blonde1 says to blonde2, those are deer tracks. Blonde2 says, no, they're bear tracks. They were still arguing when the train hit them.

[Wolf]

Two blondes were walking down the street when they came across some tracks. Blonde1 says to blonde2, those are deer tracks. Blonde2 says, no, they're bear tracks. They were still arguing when the train hit them.
Dunno who's sadder, thee or me... :devil2:

[WRT]

I figured that as the thread was heading into sadder and sadder jokes, so figured I would help it on its way ;)

[idb]

A baby penguin walks into a bar and asks the barman if he has seen his father.
The barman say "Dunno, what does he look like?"

[Hitcher]

A perch is what a parrot sits on, a perch is also a type of fish.

How did the worlds crappest joke get so many replies?
Having felt a need to explain a groaner like that is almost worthy of negative rep. Almost...

[Wolf]

Having felt a need to explain a groaner like that is almost worthy of negative rep. Almost...
Isn't it the sign of a truly bad pun - there are ones you laugh at and ones you groan at, but even the groaners are better than those that get no reaction at all...

My Uncle and I have on-going punoramas. By my reckoning we're both winning... him on the laugh scale, me on the groan scale.

[hXc]

This blonde was walking down the river bank when she came across another blonde on the opposite side and asked her, "Hey how did you get to the other side??" and the other replies with "What do you mean? You're already on the other side!"

A blonde was driving down the road when she came across a blonde sitting in a dinghy(sp?) with the oars in the middle of a paddock so she got of her car and yelled out, "Oi! What do you think you're doing?" and this blonde in the dinghy(sp?) says "I'm sitting in my dinghy(sp?) enjoying the fresh ocean air." This blonde on the side of the road yells back, "It's blondes like you that give us blondes a bad name. If I could swim I would come out their and deck you!"(Un-intentional pun)

[scumdog]

What's white and wriggles across the floor?

Cum dancing.

[unhingedlizard]

Having felt a need to explain a groaner like that is almost worthy of negative rep. Almost...

Ah, but it was my joke in the first place so it doesnt count.

[LB]

A perch is what a parrot sits on, a perch is also a type of fish.

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AAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Thanks UHL, now I get it!! (Very subtle, I like it - must try it on the girls at work.)

IDB I don't get the penguin joke......
.
.

[idb]

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IDB I don't get the penguin joke......
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Think about it literally - what if you were actually in a real bar on Lambton Quay and a talking baby penguin comes in.

I think the humour is in the anticipation of a punchline that ignores the absurdity of the situtation as most jokes do, but then the surprise of the inane reaction of the barman asking the stupidest question he could have.
Or not...maybe someone else can explain it better. All I know is I found it very funny.

Hmm, it doesn't seem so funny when you explain it.

Answer below - don't look if you don't want it explained.

















he looks like a penguin

[Wolf]

I think the humour is in the anticipation of a punchline that ignores the absurdity of the situtation as most jokes do,
Like the old one about the guy who goes into a bar and is visibly surprised to see a horse serving at the bar.

"What's the matter?" Asks the horse, "you think it's unusual that a horse would be serving at a bar?"

"Sorry," says the bloke, "it's just that I didn't realise the cow had sold the place."

[WRT]

Or the horse that walked into the bar, and the barman asks "Why the long face?"

[Wolf]

Polar bear walks into a bar and says "I'll have a gin and............................................... .................................................. ......................tonic, please."

The bartender says "Sure. Why the big pause?"

"They help me walk on the snow."

[idb]

Two racehorses sitting in a bar after a meeting.
One says "Did you see Hamill's Luck in the third? He was running about fifth coming into the straight, just took off and flew past the rest of the field. Absolutely amazing!"
The other says "Yeah, I spoke to him later and he reckons he just got this incredible shot of adrenaline from nowhere and can hardly remember the end of the race at all"
A greyhound sitting at the next table piped up and said "Yes, it isn't as uncommon a phenomenon as you might expect, apparently it comes from some primal subconscious reaction to a competitive situation..."

The horses looked at each with a surprised look at one said "Bugger me, a talking dog!"