View Full Version : Midget talks funny
NotaGoth
6th October 2005, 15:15
One morning, a stud farm owner recieves a visit from a midget wanting to buy a horse. It's soon obvious that the dwarf has a speech impediment.
"Can I view a female horth?" he asks. Dutifully, the owner leads one out, and shows the midget the hooves and legs.
"That'th a thtrong looking beatht, for thure," says the gnomic breeder, nodding his head. "Can I thee her mouf?"
Confused as to how the tiny man will ride the animal, the farmer still picks up the midget and shows him him the horse's mouth. "Nith, healthy-looking horth," agrees the midget. "Move me awownd to her eerth..."
Now getting annoyed, the owner lifts up the midget one more time to look at the ears.
"Finally," says the Lilliputian, "can I see her twat?"
With that, the owner picks up the midget and shoves his head into the horse's vagina.
Pulling him out after a minute, the tiny man stumbles around, dazed. "Perhapth I thould rephrathe that," he says, shaking his head. "Can I thee her wun awownd?"
Beemer
6th October 2005, 16:21
Recent repost
John
6th October 2005, 20:28
When I saw the topic title I thought it was about me, guess no one loves me anymore :crybaby:
placidfemme
7th October 2005, 06:48
When I saw the topic title I thought it was about me, guess no one loves me anymore :crybaby:
lol your not that short
good joke by the way!
SixPackBack
7th October 2005, 06:51
When I saw the topic title I thought it was about me, guess no one loves me anymore :crybaby:
Bbbbaaaaraby loves you John.....and she is similar height
miSTa
12th September 2006, 20:41
A guy calls his buddy a horse rancher and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse for him.
His buddy asks, "How will I recognize him?"
That's easy, he's a midget with a speech impediment."
The midget shows up at the ranch, and the rancher asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.
The dwarf says, "A female horth."
The rancher shows him a prize filly.
"Nithe lookin horth"., says the dwarf.
"Can I thee her eyeth"?
The guy picks up the midget and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.
"Nith eyeth", says the dwarf.
"Now can I thee her earzth"?
The rancher picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.
"Nith earzth,
Now can I see her mouf"?
The rancher is gettin' pretty pissed off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
Nice mouf, Now can I see her twot"?
Totally mad as hell at this point, the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams the midget's head as far as he can up the horse's twat, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.
"Perhapth I should rephrase that;
Can I thee her wun awound a widdle bit"?
Beemer
13th September 2006, 10:12
Repost! Seen it on here at least twice (but can only find one) - Sniper, you're slipping!
http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?t=18211&highlight=horse
Sniper
13th September 2006, 12:18
Repost! Seen it on here at least twice (but can only find one) - Sniper, you're slipping!
http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?t=18211&highlight=horse
Am not, I was still in bed
Beemer
13th September 2006, 13:46
Am not, I was still in bed
After 10am? Sorry, you're not slipping - you're LAZY!!!
The_Dover
13th September 2006, 13:54
Not another thread about Finn.
Sniper
13th September 2006, 13:57
After 10am? Sorry, you're not slipping - you're LAZY!!!
Oi :oi:
I said I was in bed, I didnt say I was in bed sleeping ;)
WRT
13th September 2006, 14:07
I said I was in bed, I didnt say I was in bed sleeping ;)
Been firing off a few rounds there Sniper?
Beemer
13th September 2006, 15:50
Oi :oi:
I said I was in bed, I didnt say I was in bed sleeping ;)
Ah, but you didn't say there was anyone there with you so I won't even start on what you may or may not have been doing, but I hope you washed your hands afterwards! :gob:
miSTa
13th September 2006, 23:25
Repost! Seen it on here at least twice (but can only find one) - Sniper, you're slipping!
http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?t=18211&highlight=horse
Doesn't count - that was posted 12 days before I signed up to KB :devil2:
Yep the Queer Repost Finder has slipped up badly...:whistle: (pt of course)
huck farley
4th April 2008, 22:17
A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse.
His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?'
'That's easy; he's a midget with a speech impediment.'
So, the midget shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.
'A female horth.'
So he shows him a prized filly.
'Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth'?
So the guy picks up the midget and he gives the horse 's eyes the once over.
'Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth'?
So he picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.
'Nith earzth, can I see her mouf'?
The rancher is getting pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
'Nice mouf, can I see her twot'?
Totally mad as fire at this point, the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams the midget's head as far as he can up the horse's fanny, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.
'Perhapth I should rephrase that. Can I thee her wun awound a widdlebit'?
sosman
5th April 2008, 00:28
What happen to the midget that walked under the lady's skirt?......
He got a CLIT around the ear... & a FLAP across the face ...:Punk:
scumdog
5th April 2008, 00:31
What happen to the midget that walked under the lady's skirt?......
He got a CLIT around the ear... & a FLAP across the face ...:Punk:
And the dwarf got a box around the ears..
YellowDog
25th March 2009, 11:54
A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending
a friend over to look at a horse.
His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?'
'That's easy; he's a midget with a speech impediment.'
So, the midget shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking
for a male or female horse.
'A female horth.'
So he shows him a prized filly.
'Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth'?
So the guy picks up the midget and he gives the
horse's eyes the once over.
'Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth'?
So he picks the little fella up again, and shows
him the horse's ears.
'Nith earzth, can I see her mouf'?
The rancher is getting pretty ticked off by this point,
but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
'Nice mouf, can I see her twot'?
Totally mad as fire at this point, the rancher grabs him
under his arms and rams the midget's head as far as
he can up the horse's fanny, pulls him out and slams
him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.
'Perhapth I should rephrase that.
Can I thee her wun awound a widdlebit'?
Brownbikerbabe
25th March 2009, 13:35
HEHEHEHEEEE...good one!
Sharry
26th March 2009, 20:08
:killingme:killingme:killingme:killingme:killingme :killingme:killingme
nothingflash
2nd December 2009, 20:00
A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse.
His buddy asks, 'How will I recognise him?'
'That's easy; he's a dwarf with a speech impediment.'
So, the dwarf shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.
'A female horth.'
So he shows him a prized filly.
'Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth?'
So the guy picks up the dwarf and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.
'Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth?'
So he picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.
'Nith earzth, can I thee her mouf?'
The rancher is getting pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
'Nice mouf, can I see her twat?'
Totally mad at this point, the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams the dwarf's head up the horse's fanny, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.
'Perhapth I should rephrathe that. Can I thee her wun awoun a widdlebit?'
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