Would you be pissed off?

[Str8 Jacket]

If found out through the oldfriends website that your lil brother had gotten married a coupleof months ago and hadnt told or invited you, would YOU be a bit miffed?

[Steam]

Yep. Something SERIOUSLY wrong there.

[Nasty]

Totally ... but then again I was invited to my brothers girlfriends birthday and they got married then (the first wife) ... that also annoyed me a little :yes:

[janno]

Janno's rules for dealing with shite.

Rule number one. Just because they are your relative doesn't mean you have to like them.

Rule number two. You can love someone but not like them, or not like what they've just done.

Rule number three. Sometimes people have their own demons, and it's not about you at all, therefore, nothing you have done or not done.

But is your brother doing this a hurtful thing? Sure it is.

[Str8 Jacket]

Janno's rules for dealing with shite.

Rule number one. Just because they are your relative doesn't mean you have to like them.

Rule number two. You can love someone but not like them, or not like what they've just done.

Rule number three. Sometimes people have their own demons, and it's not about you at all, therefore, nothing you have done or not done.

But is your brother doing this a hurtful thing? Sure it is.

OR.... you could be the biggest bitch in the world and totally deserve what you get.

[janno]

OR.... you could be the biggest bitch in the world and totally deserve what you get.

You mean you did something you now regret? Then talk to the man! Or write a letter and then leave the ball in his court.

You may not get the happy ending you want, but you'll feel more respect for yourself if you front up and apologise, if this is what you need to do.

(Talking from personal experience here.)

[stag21]

Hey look on the bright side,it saved you buying a present .

[Str8 Jacket]

You mean you did something you now regret? Then talk to the man! Or write a letter and then leave the ball in his court.

You may not get the happy ending you want, but you'll feel more respect for yourself if you front up and apologise, if this is what you need to do.

(Talking from personal experience here.)

Umm what? I dont get what you're trying to say?!!

[janno]

Ah, the wonders of the weeb. So easy to miscontrue what the other is trying to say.

If you meant to say that I'm a big bitch and deserve everything I get - well, I don't think like that and don't behave like that either. Achieves nothing and gets you nowhere.

[Str8 Jacket]

If you meant to say that I'm a big bitch and deserve everything I get - well, I don't think like that and don't behave like that either. Achieves nothing and gets you nowhere.

For sure. But often lessons are learnt for a reason!

[Mental Trousers]

Wouldn't bother me. I'd be surprised but the only thing I'd be pissed off about is missing out on a feed and lots of drinks. But then, those are the 2 reasons why nobody would be told about the wedding. Ever checked out how much a wedding is?? You can buy a brand new bike for the price of one of those.

[Str8 Jacket]

Wouldn't bother me. I'd be surprised but the only thing I'd be pissed off about is missing out on a feed and lots of drinks. But then, those are the 2 reasons why nobody would be told about the wedding. Ever checked out how much a wedding is?? You can buy a brand new bike for the price of one of those.

What if you were the ONLY person from youre entire family to not just not be invited but not be told by others close to you months after the wedding when you spoke with them?

[Mental Trousers]

What if you were the ONLY person from youre entire family to not just not be invited but not be told by others close to you months after the wedding when you spoke with them?
You probably shouldn't have picked on him and tortured the little bugger when you were kids then eh.
I'd be pissed off at everyone else for not telling me. It's his wedding so it's his choice whether to invite you or not. No one else has an excuse. Did they think you weren't going to ever find out??

[Str8 Jacket]

You probably shouldn't have picked on him and tortured the little bugger when you were kids then eh.
I'd be pissed off at everyone else for not telling me. It's his wedding so it's his choice whether to invite you or not. No one else has an excuse. Did they think you weren't going to ever find out??

Thanks for post. What if you were always close with your bro (even if the family never really knew and would have hated it no matter what) and you just cant understand why he wouldnt tell you, even though he knows that he would never admit that he spoke with you to the family....

[Cibby]

hmm that is bad, I think you are not telling us the full full story as far as your history with your brother..

I think you should call him and ask, so hows things bro? been married lately?

smooth huh?

Seriously thou, talk to him, communication is the key, :) i know it is hard to open up in this situation especially if you are feeling hurt, which you obviously are, but there could be a good reason for it in which case you can congratulate him adn get on with it, or there could also be a bad reason in which case, atleast you will know and can get on with it, either way.. good luck

[Mental Trousers]

Have a talk to him and find out why he didn't invite you. You really need to see both sides before deciding if you should be pissed off or not. He's probably got a very good (if somewhat twisted) reason. Possibly something like how many people should he piss off, 1 or many.

[MadDuck]

Put a positive on it. You saved on putting out for a present.

Oh and you saved having to kiss all those bad smelling Aunties you only ever see at funerals all calling you "dear" and "sweetie". Didnt they ever hear of Veet dammit !

[Str8 Jacket]

hmm that is bad, I think you are not telling us the full full story as far as your history with your brother..

I think you should call him and ask, so hows things bro? been married lately?

smooth huh?

Seriously thou, talk to him, communication is the key, :) i know it is hard to open up in this situation especially if you are feeling hurt, which you obviously are, but there could be a good reason for it in which case you can congratulate him adn get on with it, or there could also be a bad reason in which case, atleast you will know and can get on with it, either way.. good luck

Thanks for your response chick! I was removed form my parents at a young age but my lil bro wasnt and he was treated well. Because of this he has always struggled with his relationship with me.

[Str8 Jacket]

Just so ya'll know, I rang him just now. Spoke with him for a few minutes. I congratulated him and stuff but I couldnt do much more than that before I felt like I needed to cry. I had a good conversation with him but he couldnt tell me why he didnt invite me. Cause I was just enjoying speaking with him after so many years I didnt ask. I still really want to know though. It kinda hurts that he didnt even tell me he had married.

[Str8 Jacket]

This was the first time I have talked to him in almost 3 years

[Mental Trousers]

Scared he'd hurt you if you knew but weren't invited. People usually take the easy option, which is don't do anything and hope the problem quietly goes away.
Sounds like you being there would have made for an uncomfortable situation with the rest of the family. Not your fault.

[Colapop]

If found out through the oldfriends website that your lil brother had gotten married a coupleof months ago and hadnt told or invited you, would YOU be a bit miffed?
I told you already!!

[kerfufflez]

Don't know you from a bar of soap, but...
you weren't on speaking terms with someone for almost three years, and you still expected to be invited to their wedding? Why?
What would your response have been if you had got an invitation, seemingly out of the blue? Maybe he thought you'd tell him exactly where to stick his invite...

[Kickaha]

If found out through the oldfriends website that your lil brother had gotten married a coupleof months ago and hadnt told or invited you, would YOU be a bit miffed?

Mine did exactly that, although to be fair he didn't really invite or tell anyone :lol: it certainly didn't cause me to loose any sleep over it

[imdying]

This was the first time I have talked to him in almost 3 yearsThere's your answer right there... generally a wedding is a time with people who are close to you, and from your comments, you're not one of them.

[SARGE]

If found out through the oldfriends website that your lil brother had gotten married a coupleof months ago and hadnt told or invited you, would YOU be a bit miffed?



i cant honestly say i would Str8..


the most important word in the English Language is ...


NEXT!!

maybe thats just me though..i have been accused of being a bit cold and detached a few times in the last 40-odd years..

i'd say just bust out your feelings to him.. lay it out and let the chips fall

[Macktheknife]

This was the first time I have talked to him in almost 3 years

There is your answer right there, from his point of view, you have not kept in touch and don't even know the wife-to-be, weddings are expensive so no invite for str8.
As for others not telling you, don't fall into the trap of thinking this is a conspiracy against you, it may be they didn't know you knew him, cared about it, hadn't been told, whatever.
Seriously, don't get bent about it, just realise that if this is a relationship you value, then maybe you need to work on it some more, stay in regular contact and keep the door open. You never know who else in the family might become closer/friendlier too if they see you are willing to do this.
Best of luck
Mack

[Sniper]

Nope, turn around, walk away and always think of them as family. Shit happens, no point getting angry over it.

[Lissa]

Just so ya'll know, I rang him just now. Spoke with him for a few minutes. I congratulated him and stuff but I couldnt do much more than that before I felt like I needed to cry. I had a good conversation with him but he couldnt tell me why he didnt invite me. Cause I was just enjoying speaking with him after so many years I didnt ask. I still really want to know though. It kinda hurts that he didnt even tell me he had married.
Yes I would be miffed Hels.

But bloody good on ya for calling him. I know that would have needed to talk to him, to let him know that you know he got married. Keep in contact with him.... and I hope your relationship only gets stronger from it. Oneday he will tell you why you werent invited, or on another occasion when you feel strong ring and ask... he is YOUR brother afterall. Ive got three of them, I'll trade you one if you like :yes:

[Oakie]

When we got married I didn't invite a favourite uncle of mine because he lived in Australia and had no money (struggling author). I didn't invite him because I didn't want him to feel obliged to send a present (I knew damned well that he couldn't afford the trip.)

The reason you weren't invited or weren't even told may not be what you think so don't get too pissed off too soon.

[Paul in NZ]

Well one hings for sure hels - when you get married we are all coming and yes - we are ALL gunna get drunk and be embarassin'

Dibs on giving you away chick (or selling you to the highest bidder)

[Clivoris]

Well one hings for sure hels - when you get married we are all coming and yes - we are ALL gunna get drunk and be embarassin'

Dibs on giving you away chick (or selling you to the highest bidder)

I'll bring the rum chickee.

[Str8 Jacket]

Well one hings for sure hels - when you get married we are all coming and yes - we are ALL gunna get drunk and be embarassin'

Dibs on giving you away chick (or selling you to the highest bidder)

Can I keep the profits?


I'll bring the rum chickee.

You are top of my list for an invite, should I ever get married! mmmmm rum :love: