Well This Is Not FUN..... [Archive]

Paul in NZ

24th October 2007, 11:42

Frankly this pretty well sucks…..

Hmm.. Where to start, especially since this is bound to be horribly embarrassing when it all turns out to be an ingrown hair or a peanut I swallowed when I was 5…

I’ve been described as being moody… and it’s true, a big ego, a bit of bi polar and type one diabetes (my blood sugars really affect my temperament) is probably not a great mix and frankly I’ve offended people I didn’t mean to but I can’t say I worry too much about it all….. But I’ve been an extra bit touchy lately.. We all have our demons to face in life and currently mine seems to have a name, Testicular Cancer…

Now thats not quite true, the chances are is not even cancer, BUT yes, there is ‘something’ and it isn’t a good something in a place where men really don't want extra things and it’s growing so bring on the embarrassing probes and the machines that go ‘bing’. The doctors are great! :doctor:

Some people would wait until it’s confirmed 100% either way but for me, open, loud and honest; despite the consequences has always been the best. Frankly I think its a cyst or something.....

How do I feel? It changes like the weather, terrified one moment, happy the next but always always up for the challenge and 100% positive this is a temporary set back and will NOT be the way I go…. Pissed off? No not really, a quick read of any daily paper reveals that far worse things happen daily to great people and I have a wonderful life really, I can’t see this minor hiccup changing that.

The only thing that does piss me off… I had a hot nurse fiddling with me wobbly bits and was very disappointed to find it was not even mildly arousing. Frankly it all looked a lot hotter when I imagined it.

So there ya go – this ride has left the platform and I’ve got the bars gripped firmly. Bring it on, its gunna be a wild one….

steveb64

24th October 2007, 11:48

:doctor: Jeez. Good luck mate. Can't think of much else to say...

merv

24th October 2007, 11:49

Hey best wishes and hope it all works out OK for you.

jrandom

24th October 2007, 11:51

Best of luck dude, and if it does turn out to be TC, chin up and fight the bastard.

If a girly-man like Lance Armstrong can beat it, you'll be sweet as.

:niceone:

sels1

24th October 2007, 11:51

Crikey Paul, good luck mate. Hoping its just a cyst - when do you find out?

Krusti

24th October 2007, 11:52

That sux mate, hope it all turns out ok....

Her_C4

24th October 2007, 11:53

Well - I am lost for words. :( Doesn't happen often - relish the moment.

My thoughts are with you Paul at this time - must be frustrating as all hell to know there is 'something' and not know the 'what' - that sux.

I hope that it is something rather innocuous - like a cyst or something as you say, and if not, well we will all be willing participants on the journey of discovery with you.

Use us to help keep you strong :niceone:

'Good luck' seems such inadequate words to use here - but there is heartfelt feeling along with it and I wish you buckets of it.... :hug: :hug:

Mikkel

24th October 2007, 11:54

However, they are pretty good at shaving your balls at the hospital and nothing beats the cold gooey feel of that contact gel for the ultra-sound scanner... I'm almost getting myself wound up here ;)

Seriously, it's not a fun thing to have. I went for a scan myself back in 2000 after having had sore balls for a while... Turned out to be nothing. Hope you'll get the same answer. But yeah, the waiting time is the worst.

Worst thing that can happen is that they have to come off which will remove your weakest spot in a pubbrawl. :)

BarBender

24th October 2007, 11:54

Head down on the tank and keep the throttle pinned! :niceone:

Joni

24th October 2007, 11:55

Paul - as aleady mentioned, Im here if you need anything! :sunny:

I'm hoping with all my hopes it turns out ok!

007XX

24th October 2007, 11:56

Oh man! Really sorry to hear...Of course, I can't exactly relate anatomy wise, but I had a scare in the breast department 2 weeks before Christmas last year.

All the very best wishes sir!

MSTRS

24th October 2007, 11:59

:eek5: Knackers are over-rated, your life isn't. Fingers crossed mate.

Trudes

24th October 2007, 12:13

All the best Paul. Please do let us know how you get on. :hug:

skelstar

24th October 2007, 12:15

Thats shit luck dude... good luck.

vifferman

24th October 2007, 12:18

You'll be fine, Paul. Just remember, worse things happen at sea... :buggerd:

Swoop

24th October 2007, 13:13

You'll be sweet! Try not to worry (difficult as it is).
All good thoughts going your way.
Also: PICTURES OF THE HOT NURSES PLEASE!!!!

xwhatsit

24th October 2007, 13:17

I know exactly what it is. You can tell the doctors. It's that bloody FZR400 -- you're too used to proper bikes with crappy brakes and normal tank/seats -- all you've done is grabbed a handful of the stoppers, and crushed your nuts against the FZR's tank :yes:

Hope it is just a cyst. Cancer seems to be rife throughout my family, and it doesn't seem overwhelmingly fun. Who was it just recently (was it here on KB?) who got a nut out and they replaced it with a silicone copy (`feels just like the real thing!')?

Good luck.

Str8 Jacket

24th October 2007, 13:51

Ah fuck Paul. I kinda know what you are going through and its not nice. I really hope that everything turns out OK! You know where I am if you ever need to talk mate! BIG HUGS!

riffer

24th October 2007, 14:00

Good thoughts heading your way mate.

tri boy

24th October 2007, 14:42

:eek5: Knackers are over-rated, your life isn't. Fingers crossed mate.

Agree. Vibes going your way.:yes:

Lias

24th October 2007, 15:11

*finds silver lining for you*

I knew a bloke who had TC in his 20's and had both the boys removed. He then went on to work as a nearly indestructable bouncer, so you have a new career all lined up for you :first:

In all seriousness thou hope things work out ok for you, I've only briefly met you once in person and butted heads a few times online but people whos opinion I trust tell me that the sun really does shine out of your arse and your a top chap.

Hoping you get the all clear soon mate.

Colapop

24th October 2007, 15:28

They say in every life a little rain must fall. Another trial for you Paul. I have confidence that you will overcome this as you have life's other trials that have been sent your way. One thing I will note however, is that throughout whatever else has happened, you've always had time and effort to help other people. I for one, have no problems doing whatever little I can.

Hitcher

24th October 2007, 15:32

I was trying to think of something that rhymes with testicles, but I am stumped on that score. And I don't think there's much credence in your "peanut" theory.

Good on you for seeking medical advice. If more fellows did that in the early stages of "blokes" cancers (e.g. prostate and testicular), fewer would die from the consequences.

Good luck with this Paul. Hopefully it's nothing more than an ingrown hair. Or something that can be cured by the insertion of a very hot needle...

Daffyd

24th October 2007, 15:35

My thoughts are with you. Keep your chin up!

24th October 2007, 15:41

Paul, thoughts are with you and hope the results show nothing serious.

Yeah, blokes need to have tests done too, girlies are very aware of breast cancer and regularly have mammograms (or SHOULD have them).

Had the blood test a few weeks back and clear reults...

Take care

Al

Macktheknife

24th October 2007, 15:44

Best of luck Paul, you should be pretty glad the nurse thing was not arousing, I know what they do to discourage that.... you have enough to worry about! lol.
Stay strong mate.

Fatjim

24th October 2007, 16:35

:eek5: Knackers are over-rated, your life isn't. Fingers crossed mate.

Don't listen to him Paul, he just can't remember what its like to have them. Hold on to those suckers with both hands (and you missuses) and all your might.

Best wishes.

Blackbird

24th October 2007, 19:04

All the very best Paul. You've got a great attitude mate and you're the only one having a go at yourself! Incidentally, your views on a hot nurse fiddling with your wedding tackle is something I can empathise with. When I had my vasectomy. I was horrified to find that the nurse who was going to give me the local injection was the rather hot wife of a friend of ours. Far from being erotic, I was terrified that she'd think I was the absolute reverse of being hung like a baboon:shutup: Fear of a medical procedure seems to have ummm... a diminishing effect.

Keep smiling.

Geoff

Hitcher

24th October 2007, 19:09

I've remembered a limerick that mentions three testicles...

Mom

24th October 2007, 19:12

I've remembered a limerick that mentions three testicles...

do share........:yes:

Hitcher

24th October 2007, 19:17

do share...

There was a young man from Dundee
Who molested an ape up a tree
The result was most horrid
All bum and no forehead
Three balls and a purple goatee.

Mom

24th October 2007, 19:19

There was a young man from Dundee
Who molested an ape up a tree
The result was most horrid
All bum and no forehead
Three balls and a purple goatee.

Very good!!

Nice work!

HTFU

24th October 2007, 19:43

Thats pretty funny :lol:- the post that is - not your little problem.

Sounds like you are taking the ball by its horns. Good on you for posting it here. I think its good for other men to discuss such things, might make a few of us go to the doctor before the Missus finds a third nut in the package.

Hope it works out for ya :2thumbsup.

pete376403

24th October 2007, 19:59

Best of luck regardless of what it turns out to be. Incidentally, Bruce Anstey had, and beat this - and look what a great rider he turned out to be. It might improve your riding ability yet!

Timber020

24th October 2007, 20:03

Dude, itll be fine, best of all you will get to join and master Fight Club.

Good luck mate.

Storm

24th October 2007, 20:24

Best of luck and well done for tackling it early, and getting it looked at.
PS Dont worry about the nurses, its because Vicki is so much hotter than some nurse (be sure to tell her that too;) )

Motu

24th October 2007, 20:27

How much for the Triumph?

Paul in NZ

24th October 2007, 20:43

How much for the Triumph?

Jeeze youre a hard old thing... Nah - not for sale yet :oi-grr:, I'm sure I've still got balls enough for the Trophy..

et al

24th October 2007, 20:47

Sorry to hear this news Paul - I hope it has the best possible outcome for you. I admire your attitude in being so open about it, and in being prepared to meet it head on, you are an inspiration to others who may be similarly afflicted.

Paul in NZ

24th October 2007, 20:48

Thanks one and all... This has been quite an experience thus far and I'm humbled by the kind thoughts - I feel better already..

Never one to pass up an opportunity, I've convinced Vicki that regular massages of the infected area is a wonderful alternative natural cure.... No not really - I'm kinda groped out right now but you never know.. Might pull that one out later

Motu

24th October 2007, 21:15

Jeeze youre a hard old thing... Nah - not for sale yet :oi-grr:, I'm sure I've still got balls enough for the Trophy..

Just testing....you have to prod tender spots in moments like these to see if there is some sign of life.I don't really want it anyway - the brake shoes aren't original.

Hang in there,I'm sure it's only a small piece of pippy shell....it could well be a pearl.Pity you are so far away,I'd have a look with a Stanley knife for you.....

The boys have rubber suits and eagerly await 3.5 metres of hollow plastic arriving next week.....thank you for the insights on that.

Storm

24th October 2007, 21:16

By crikey, you're an inspiration Paul :first:

Paul in NZ

25th October 2007, 05:52

The boys have rubber suits and eagerly await 3.5 metres of hollow plastic arriving next week.....thank you for the insights on that.

Excellent news!

kevfromcoro

25th October 2007, 06:15

The waiting for the results is the worst part.
I have just been through the same thing
Imagined the worst'
Went for a blood test..took about 6 bottles out me.
I have just returned from Asia.where ther heath standards arent that flash
I mean hep.A,B.or C is pretty easy to pick up.
As well as a few other STD things.
I drink like a fish ,,smoke to much and eat all the wrong food
Been worried about the results all week
Went and saw the doc, yesterday..
Turns around and says.... whatever you are doing dont change it...you are in perfect health
Attitude.Mate..it will get you through

Paul in NZ

25th October 2007, 08:29

Attitude.Mate..it will get you through

Attitude? Attitude... Ah Crap.... Vicki, get the bed down of the roof, its attitude, not altitude dammit...

Cheers folks - feeling quite chipper today...

buellbabe

25th October 2007, 08:41

Well good on you!

Gotta say, you have a great way of looking at things and I admire your positive attitude.

I happen to know a bloke who has had 3 balls instead of 2 most of his life... lately the extra one has been giving him some grief so he got it checked out... he was freaking thinking of all the bad scenarios and it turned out to be just a cyst..much to his relief.
However the Doctor said "you've had this HOW LONG?" So next week he is having a procedure to remove it... won't be riding for a little while but thats a small price to pay.

Sincerely hope things turn out OK for you.

Mikkel

25th October 2007, 08:57

Good to hear you're cheering up. They say laughter is the best medicine - so always look on the bright side eh...

I happen to know a bloke who has had 3 balls instead of 2 most of his life... lately the extra one has been giving him some grief so he got it checked out... he was freaking thinking of all the bad scenarios and it turned out to be just a cyst..much to his relief.
However the Doctor said "you've had this HOW LONG?" So next week he is having a procedure to remove it... won't be riding for a little while but thats a small price to pay.

Hmm, am I reading this wrong... or did this bloke actually not only have two balls? If so you probably should put it that he "thought" he had three balls... In which case you could make a case for lack of knowledge in anatomy!
But then again, a lot of people do talk up their balls everynow and again ;)

buellbabe

25th October 2007, 09:04

PICKY!

Ok he THOUGHT he had 3... since the 3rd (which as it turns out was a HUGE cyst) was the same size etc... as the others...

does that clarify it? LOL

Mikkel

25th October 2007, 09:05

PICKY!

Ok he THOUGHT he had 3... since the 3rd (which as it turns out was a HUGE cyst) was the same size etc... as the others...

does that clarify it? LOL

Thank you - now I'm much happier... here... at... work :)

:Punk:

Paul in NZ

25th October 2007, 10:19

Bloody hell ! Thats wierd! A friend just emailed me reminding me of my nickname in 'another' group is - Nobby... Its now 'Nobby Nuts' Which also ties into my last name.. I tell ya - I just about wet myself..

Thanks Veronica - I needed a laugh!

Cheers

imdying

25th October 2007, 10:41

That's some fully ghey shite... better testicular than terminal though!

bert_is_evil

25th October 2007, 11:30

That's bad news Paul, all the best!

Kendog

25th October 2007, 16:22

All the best Paul.
Tis good you are so open about such things, I am sure it helps others round here.

steveb64

25th October 2007, 16:36

Jeeze youre a hard old thing... Nah - not for sale yet :oi-grr:, I'm sure I've still got balls enough for the Trophy..

So, are you going to take up sidecar racing then? I remember from years back, Annie Kippen (NZ champ) saying "To race sidecars, you either need big balls, or no balls at all!". ;)

Lissa

25th October 2007, 17:55

Aww Crapola. All the best Paul, and truely hope it turns out to be nothing too serious. You have an awesome attitude, keep looking on the bright side mately no point in worrying or stressing too much. Let us know how you get on too. :hug:

bistard

25th October 2007, 17:58

Hey Paul,I have not been on the site for a while,I hope for you & your family its nothing
Just remember Bruce Anstey went through TC back in the 90s & lost both of them,but man can he ride a bike & still going strong
Keep your chin up

Paul in NZ

25th October 2007, 17:59

I can tell you one thing.... Cardio at the gym, the exercise bikes... feck... Those damn seats are NOT built for 3.... Ouchie.... Still, my walk has a certain 'swagger' to it which I consider very macho...

Paul in NZ

25th October 2007, 18:02

So, are you going to take up sidecar racing then? I remember from years back, Annie Kippen (NZ champ) saying "To race sidecars, you either need big balls, or no balls at all!". ;)

Blardy hell, they cut yer balls off mate, not remove my brain... I'll leave that to the brave...

Skyryder

25th October 2007, 20:50

Yep nothing better than a good rant. Next best medicine to laughter. You got the right attitude and that beats both laughter and a rant. I've got a chronic problem and some pieces missing. I grow a slow moe and that is not all that slowly grows.............if at all on some nights. Been where you are so know what's going on. Thinking of ya.

Skyryder

steveb64

25th October 2007, 22:22

I'll leave that to the brave...

So - like I said - When are you going to take up sidecar racing?? :laugh:

I think you're meeting the qualification criteria... :msn-wink:

Skunk Control

26th October 2007, 13:19

Our thoughts are with you guys. I know what it's like waiting for results of lumps.
Let us know if you guys need anything.

Ms Piggy

28th October 2007, 13:26

Hey Paul,
I was alerted to your predicament by a canny wee Scots lassie on the other side of the world! I'm not on Kbers much these days.

My thoughts are with you & Vicki, you've been though enough I reckon! Take care *hug*

Paul in NZ

31st October 2007, 20:53

James Deuce

31st October 2007, 20:54

Good work on addressing the issue and getting it dealt to instead of waiting for it to be a bigger issue. I once spent three days in hospital across the way from a bloke who ignored just such an issue and he left before I did, if you get my drift.

Usual story; if you need anything let us know.

Lissa

31st October 2007, 20:57

Sorry to hear that it is a tumour Paul :( . At least the professionals are on to it, and you get the necessary treatment as quickly as you can. Hoping for the best for you. I know it must be hard, but think as postively as you can mate. :hugs:

Mikkel

31st October 2007, 21:32

Argh! Not the news i wanted tonight but not too bad either...

Yes - there is a tumour (the bad news) but it might be a fairly rare and reasonably OK one....

More prodding and likely some snipping.... fugit...

I'll keep my fingers crossed for it to be benign. Best of luck mate...

If it comforts you, consider that balls are just glorified kidneys - it hurts like shit if you get punched there but you actually have a backup!

Clivoris

31st October 2007, 21:58

Hang tough Paul. My fingers are crossed for you as well mate.

Curious_AJ

31st October 2007, 22:05

get well soon!!!!!

steveb64

31st October 2007, 23:20

Luck dude! Lots of it being sent your way...

Paul in NZ

8th November 2007, 08:48

Well after a great deal of stressful 'over thinking', usually at 3am :crybaby: we are getting better news.

The tumour appears to be in the epididymis which, if you are going to have a tumour at all is one of the better places (apparently).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epididymis

Usually - we would only expect less than 5% of these tumours to be malignant which is pretty good betting odds. So - in a couple of weeks I will visit the hospital, get knocked out, the surgeon will remove the offending epididymis and pass it to the pathologist. This person will give a thumbs up or down and a decision will be made on the fate of Mr left testicle.. (frankly - he's a little nervous about it)... Then my bits get sent to the lab - worst case I go back for a more complete exercision...

Anyway - I expect to be up and around shortly after the little op (thats a bit rich calling it an operation but since I'm having a general ana - erm anya - being knocked out) ...

Well maybe I won't be 'up' as such the next day - at least for a couple of days - Vicki says she is looking forward to the rest anyway...

In the worst case I loose a testicle and I gain a changing room talking point... I've not quite decided whether I want a collosal set of fake testicles or perhaps spikey ones like one of those dog toys - might even keep the squeaker if I go that way.. I figure a tinkly bell would set of the metal detector at the airport.

Anyway - now that i have a date for the op i feel it's a bit more under control and thus i feel a lot better.. Its been a rollercoaster i can tell you - a genuine epiphany and something I need to think about a little. Of course I feel more than a little foolish that it's probably not cancerous (there I said it) BUT let me tell you - it's NOT something you want to take any chances with. I detected this early and it's a simple proceedure... TRUST me - getting the prostrate checked is a zero after what I've been through BUT I'd do it again in a flash (no I didn't enjoy it)... The world seems a bit brighter today...

Guys and gals - check for lumps - get yer stuff checked regularly OK...

Hitcher

8th November 2007, 08:51

Fingers crossed Paul. A "squeaker" sounds like an excellent worst-case scenario...

janno

8th November 2007, 09:07

Best of luck Paul. I've always liked the sound of tinkley bells . . .

steveb64

8th November 2007, 09:18

Well after a great deal of stressful 'over thinking', usually at 3am :crybaby: we are getting better news.

The tumour appears to be in the epididymis which, if you are going to have a tumour at all is one of the better places (apparently).

Snip'd

Of course I feel more than a little foolish that it's probably not cancerous (there I said it) BUT let me tell you - it's NOT something you want to take any chances with. I detected this early and it's a simple proceedure... TRUST me - getting the prostrate checked is a zero after what I've been through BUT I'd do it again in a flash (no I didn't enjoy it)... The world seems a bit brighter today...

Guys and gals - check for lumps - get yer stuff checked regularly OK...

Confucius says: "Better to feel foolish, and maybe have one less nugget in the sack, than to feel no fear, and be buried in a few months time!"

Keep thinking positive, and never give up! (Works when you think you're gonna crash too...).:niceone: Hope it's just a cyst! :sweatdrop:rockon:

Trudes

8th November 2007, 09:35

What an awesome attitude Paul, you're a star in my book. All the best with the rest!

Mikkel

8th November 2007, 09:35

That's good news. I hope you'll have sweet dreams while they're working on your undercarriage - getting "knocked out" should be a rather weird experience(in the kinda non-experience way) I've been told. ;)

Best of luck!

Str8 Jacket

8th November 2007, 10:39

My thoughts are with you mate, its not fun. You have a great attitude and I know that you'll be OK!

Nasty

8th November 2007, 10:49

The news is on the ups Paul ... lets keep it there .. I know its tough and our thoughts are with you.

sels1

8th November 2007, 12:23

All the best for the op - thinking about it is probably worse than having it!

scumdog

8th November 2007, 12:43

Here's hoping for the best Paul:calm:

BTW - Go for an extra TWO balls if you end up having one removed - always good for the gasp factor in the changing room....

Joni

8th November 2007, 12:47

BTW - Go for an extra TWO balls if you end up having one removed - always good for the gasp factor in the changing room....:lol: Indeed - and if they squeeked even better... might also provide Vicki with endless amusement. :shifty:

Take care.... you know you are in my thoughts.

Paul in NZ

8th November 2007, 12:49

Hmmm - a cluster.... Excellent.. A bunch of grapes could be better than a pumpkin..

Beemer

8th November 2007, 12:53

Good luck Paul, you're a top bloke and we both wish you all the best.

Skunk Control

8th November 2007, 21:00

Lots of :hug::hug::hug::hug::hug: coming your way for both you guys, take care.

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 00:06

Just a quick update for the curious....

The tumor and other tissue were removed today from the left testicle and all in all I feel pretty good - just a bit of trouble sleeping and a bit of discomfort.

Follow up appt in 3 weeks for Pathology results but surgeon thinks its OK at this stage. The people at Wakefield Hospital were bloody awesome to me and I was very well looked after. Vickis been fabulous nurse but won't wear the special nurses uniform I got for her :drool: (just kidding - I dread any thoughts of things stirring down there)

What an age of wonders we live in. In at 11, knocked out at 12.45, operation and awake at 3pm home at 10:30 pm and feeling ok (ish).

If there is a lesson here it is to check yourself regularly and take action early. I expect a full recovery and being lighter now expect the bike to go faster as well...

Many thanks for the kind thoughts everyone.

Paul n Vicki

jazbug5

27th November 2007, 00:13

Paul, I am so pleased for you, and so glad you checked yourself out and caught the bugger. This has made my day. :)

Hope the discomfort doesn't last long; Arnica tablets might help.

skidMark

27th November 2007, 02:43

Nasty

27th November 2007, 04:45

Paul ... good that you are home .. I am sure that people heal faster when they are in their own environment .... faster and better!

James Deuce

27th November 2007, 05:42

You'll have to get some new leathers now, what with those ones you just bought being equipped with the man pouch that all Christchurch riders require.

Welcome to the life of a proper Wellingtonian male. You can never go home now!

But seriously very good news. Let us know how the discomfort worked out and if we need to organise party ice deliveries.

Well Done Mate

Jim

Trudes

27th November 2007, 05:46

:niceone:Paul :hug:

Ms Piggy

27th November 2007, 05:54

Great to hear Paul. Take of down there. :hug:

janno

27th November 2007, 06:07

Yay Paul! Sorry that you are feeling knackered, but I know you've got the balls to come through ok. Perhaps a nice bowl of nuts might help recovery? Too early in the morning to think of any more dreadful puns, you are damned lucky. . .

Heal fast and no playing with the jackson-pollocks until given the all clear.

chanceyy

27th November 2007, 06:44

Dunno how this thread eluded me .. but well done paul for getting it checked out & at least the surgery is behind you ... positive thoughts for the final results ...

Crisis management

27th November 2007, 07:00

Good to hear your ok Paul, I hope the pathology confirms the surgeons opinion. Thinking of you and hope you make a full recovery.

sels1

27th November 2007, 07:05

Good to here the op went ok, Paul, all the best for the recovery

yungatart

27th November 2007, 07:13

Take care of yourself. All the best for a speedy recovery.
Hopefully it won't be too long till you are back in the saddle....

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 07:21

Take care of yourself. All the best for a speedy recovery.
Hopefully it won't be too long till you are back in the saddle....

Hmm - thats what Vicki said too......:laugh:

yungatart

27th November 2007, 07:24

Hmm - thats what Vicki said too......:laugh:

Best you get well soon then eh?

Bass

27th November 2007, 07:30

Hmmm - a cluster.... Excellent.. A bunch of grapes could be better than a pumpkin..

Well........ did you take this option?

You must remember the old advertisement: -

"Knacker lacquer - for lustre on your cluster and glamour on your rammer"

Appearance is everything!

Mend fast mate.

Hitcher

27th November 2007, 07:50

Well done Paul. Rather than rely on my own scrutiny I have endeavoured to enlist Mrs H's assistance with regular, detailed and protracted inspections of regions nether.

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 08:08

Well done Paul. Rather than rely on my own scrutiny I have endeavoured to enlist Mrs H's assistance with regular, detailed and protracted inspections of regions nether.

Ah ha... Given her vocation I suspect a 'scoop' would be the most appropriate starting point...

Hitcher

27th November 2007, 08:11

Ah ha... Given her vocation I suspect a 'scoop' would be the most appropriate starting point...

That sharp clapping noise was my thighs coming together.

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 08:17

Well........ did you take this option?

Fortunately the tumor appears to have been located in the epididymis.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epididymis

Because I caught it early - the testicle remains unaffected and was left there happily producing hormones ;-)

I have however been supplied with a rather spiffy backless jockstrap (ACE bandages finest) which I'm thinking will cause a bit of a stir at the gym :chase:

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 08:17

That sharp clapping noise was my thighs coming together.

says you in a now higher and squeaky voice

MSTRS

27th November 2007, 08:32

Such good news Paul. We're all rooting for ya (until you can for yourself again)

007XX

27th November 2007, 08:37

Such good news Paul. We're all rooting for ya (until you can for yourself again)

:clap: +1

Awesome news Paul...well done!:2thumbsup Look at it from this angle too: Your first time "post op" will be very special indeed! Just make sure you can walk afterwards! :whistle:

scumdog

27th November 2007, 08:44

Best of British and all that old chap, good to hear things look so positive!

Must say it sound rather dashing what with you wearing the crotchless jock-strap thingy, bound to cause a stir when you saunter through the mall..or do you wear more than just that?

Paul in NZ

27th November 2007, 09:02

merv

27th November 2007, 09:05

Hope this all heals up nicely and you'll be out enjoying your bikes asap.

Skyryder

27th November 2007, 10:41

Hope all pans out for ya. I Know where you are at on this thru my own experiance just different part of the anatomy. Still the suns still rising in my life. I'm sure it is in yours too. Take care and have a full recovery.

Skyryder

turtleman

27th November 2007, 11:43

Best of luck, Paul, for a speedy recovery.

And I take my hat off to everyone else for their concern and good wishes - being a noob to KB, it's this sorta thing that makes ya wanna stick around....

Storm

27th November 2007, 13:32

Best wishes for a speedy recovery and being able to mount the ride of your choice quickly
Be sure to tell us how it goes.

(The bike ride. Keep the other one to yourself eh? Dont want all the young blokes getting jealous)

pete376403

27th November 2007, 18:24

Excelent news. If it all hurts too much, 20 years ago a bag of frozen peas was the recommended pain relief after the vasectomy. If nothing else works you could try that.

Hitcher

27th November 2007, 19:03

frozen peas was the recommended pain relief after the vasectomy.

And a heater in the toilet is the cure for frozen peas.

et al

27th November 2007, 21:50

All the best for your recovery Paul, sounds like you are well on the way already - onwards and upwards from here.

James Deuce

27th November 2007, 21:57

When I rang him this morning he was whinging about not being allowed to go to work by his very sensible and very lovely wife.

Silly berk.

Motu

27th November 2007, 22:25

Bugger - so I don't get a Triumph for Christmas.

Excellent news man!

Paul in NZ

28th November 2007, 06:18

When I rang him this morning he was whinging about not being allowed to go to work by his very sensible and very lovely wife.

Silly berk.

Shes gone to werk his morning and I'm just sneaking off now.......

Storm

28th November 2007, 09:22

Ooooh, you're going to get a beating tonight! :lol:

janno

28th November 2007, 09:27

Only if someone tells.

Oh Mrs Paul . . .!

Paul in NZ

28th November 2007, 10:43

Ooooh, you're going to get a beating tonight! :lol:

Pah! What woman would beat an invalid?? Besides - as long as I'm home before her - no sweat. :2thumbsup

MSTRS

28th November 2007, 10:47

Ooooh, you're going to get a beating tonight! :lol:

Ooooh, I doubt that is something likely to happen anytime soon either. :(

Lissa

28th November 2007, 11:18

All the best paul!!! :hug:

Need ya head read though if you want to go into work!

Storm

28th November 2007, 16:16

He's just carried away by getting on TV the other day. Now he's a big star, they treat hime differently. He wants more of the attention.:bleh:

Thats my guess anyway

Paul in NZ

28th November 2007, 18:11

My agent told me not to say a thing....

nah - good day - bit sore but got heaps done

Storm

28th November 2007, 22:27

My agent told me not to say a thing....

You've changed Paul. Whats next, a brand spanking new Hog to complement your high flying status?

Paul in NZ

29th November 2007, 08:50

You've changed Paul. Whats next, a brand spanking new Hog to complement your high flying status?

If only, sadly - stardom is a fleeting thing Storm and I suspect the 1970 TR6C will have to continue to do stirling service as transport and lets face it - it still seems to attract as much attention than just another blinged out HD... ;-) Folks that don't even like bikes just love that bike and Vicki and i have had endless pleasure chatting to random folks about it... Usually we get about 10 smiles to the gallon. Much like some of your creations eh?

But you are right - I've changed - I hope for the better as well...

Cheers

James Deuce

29th November 2007, 09:20

Vicki and i have had endless pleasure chatting to random folks

I know. It gets a bit tedious after a while. Some of them end up friends if you do it often enough though.

Paul in NZ

16th December 2007, 13:20

Oh deary me - little trip in the whambulance this morning..

A bit of infection (well OK - swollen up like basketballs and gone all numb but to make up for that, the rest of me hurts like a cunt).

Maybe over doing things a bit when I started getting crook saturday but it was worth it - ouch - crikey morphines great... Nice folks on the ambulances too, didn't make me feel like a berk at all...

Off to bed - no sleep for 2 last two nights - get in while the drugs are working

yungatart

16th December 2007, 13:50

Oooh, that sounds decidedly unpleasant (the swelling and infection, I mean, not the morphine)!

Get well soon, Paul!

Hitcher

16th December 2007, 14:25

A lot of people stock up on nuts at Christmas, but I think that's overdoing it a bit, Paul.

James Deuce

16th December 2007, 14:43

FFS. Slow learner or something "Santa"?

Stay home, do not go to work, relax until after Christmas. No excuses about you being the linchpin of NEC's Wellington operation either.

Stay home. Don't make me visit. They sound big enough to "Bend it like Beckam".

In fact, I may just clean my football boots this afternoon. You wouldn't want a secondary infection.

MSTRS

16th December 2007, 15:02

Oooooh, nasty, Paul.
(previous comments deleted in the interest of good taste and replaced with....)
Kiwi men are too ready to play the 'harden up' card when really they should be taking advantage of being the layabouts (we) are often accused of being.
It's no crime to take it easy.

James Deuce

16th December 2007, 15:07

I've been in hospital with something similar last year MSTRS, and was treated the year before for a infection that turned out to be the preliminaries of what Paul's just gone through (fine needle aspiration biopsies aren't very much fun in that area), so rather than sympathy I think he needs his arse kicked for not resting up. There's a bit of a story around why he's ended up in this state, and it's largely because he puts everyone else's fun ahead of his own health.

yungatart

16th December 2007, 15:29

Well, Jim, he's a naughty boy then, although I wouldn't go as far as to say he deserves this...far from it.
It is selfless people like Paul, who don't know how or when to say no that keep this world ticking over. That said, give his arse a good kicking from me, and show Vicki how to chain him to the bed (when he is better, of course, silly!)

tri boy

16th December 2007, 18:24

Do as your told Paul:mad:. The TR6 needs you in good shape.:hug: Oh and I'm sure Vicky and family also.

crashe

16th December 2007, 18:39

Shite Paul....... please rest up and obey the doctor's advise....

Let Vicki look after you...... and be well for xmas day.......

I hope the meds you are now on kicks that infection right out the door

Take care of yourself young fella........ cos I don't think you will want
that 'grumpy' Jim2 to come around and kick butt.....

madmal64

16th December 2007, 20:20

Bugger. Im with ya about the morphine though! That is some good shit pain relief.
Rest up mate. Oh and even though it wasnt good news thanks for keeping your KB whanau in the loop.

chanceyy

16th December 2007, 20:26

geezzzz paul echo everyone else here .. now behave & get well mate ..

sels1

17th December 2007, 14:44

Sometimes the body sends a message you should listen to.....
rest up and get well mate

Edbear

17th December 2007, 14:57

Sometimes the body sends a message you should listen to...

Yup! Unless it's Vicki wearing that nurses uniform...:Oops:

Hope you recover quickish, mate!

u4ea

17th December 2007, 14:59

Just cuaght up..ouchie Paul..rest up and BEHAVE..

Paul in NZ

19th December 2007, 06:14

Well all good news today...

Pathology say the tumour was a good one. It was at the site of the vasectomy and caused by that scar blocking the sperm duct or some such.

Infection is much reduced and I'm feeling semi human again. I won't be riding motorcycles for a few weeks as the meds make me really really tired and its very hard to concentrate for any length of time. I was very fortunate on sunday (I realise that now) that Vicki didn't listen to me and called the ambulance when she did. I'd lost the plot......

Best news - a young (er than me anyway) KB'r contacted me and mentioned that as a result of reading this thread - has found his own lump and is seeking treatment early - that made me think just how great these forums can be... Well done mate,,,

Thanks for all the kind words folks - it's pretty well done now..

Paul N

ps - The specialist did an ultrasound. The skin under my testes... How thick do you reckon that got???? 1.6 cm...... Whoa! Less now... (thank goodness)

jrandom

19th December 2007, 06:16

Pathology say the tumour was a good one. It was at the site of the vasectomy and caused by that scar blocking the sperm duct or some such.

Absolutely top news, old boy. Wonderful stuff.

:niceone:

I suspect a few of us snipped ones will be checking our 'sites' a bit more often now...

Nasty

19th December 2007, 06:17

Awesome news Paul .. both you and the young guy getting his own check up .. I think those are great results all around .... I am glad you are feeling better and I am really glad that Vicki knows not to listen to you!!

buellbabe

19th December 2007, 06:24

That is just so wonderful. The best Xmas prezzy you could ask for.
I am stoked for you ;-)

Hitcher

19th December 2007, 08:05

Great news, Oh He of the Bulletproof Scrotum. Here's to a great 2008!

steveb64

19th December 2007, 12:25