The Bad Movie Thread

[EJK]

I see many movie threads lately and I thought why not I start this one.

So, whats the worst movie you've seen?

A movie that made your stomach feel like its been stirred up with a knife.

A movie that you stopped watching after 3 minutes.

A movie that made you shout "Ah FUCK!"

A movie that made your popcorn taste bad :corn:

So?


Mine has to be.... Tremors. A crap movie. I curse myself for watching that one.

[Usarka]

Mine has to be.... Tremors. A crap movie. I curse myself for watching that one.

Tremors is a cult classic, a masterpiece even :shit:

[Tank]

I hate any chick flick my wife makes me watch.

I cannot remember the name - but it dosnt really matter - they are all the same anyway. NO guns, NO explosions, NO Bikes, NO hot chicks jelly wrestling, NO Terrorist getting wasted etc. In short boring as fuck!

[EJK]

Tremors is a cult classic, a masterpiece even :shit:

Tremors 1 was bad. I thought 2 would be better so I watched it
and I was wrong.

So again I thought Tremors 3 would be better...
I was wrong again.


Bad acting. Horrible graphics. Horrible story. Enough said.

[Usarka]

Tremors 1 was bad. I thought 2 would be better so I watched it
and I was wrong.

So again I thought Tremors 3 would be better...
I was wrong again.

You're not a quick learner are you? :lol:

the key with movies like tremors is to appreciate the comedic b-gradeness of the them. planet terror is a good recent example.

[Hitcher]

The Lake House.

[enigma51]

Biker boyz
thats a winner

[MisterD]

Anything with Tom Hanks in it....

[nodrog]

Biker boyz
thats a winner

closely followed by Torque

[Tank]

Tremors 1 was bad. I thought 2 would be better so I watched it
and I was wrong.

So again I thought Tremors 3 would be better...
I was wrong again.


Bad acting. Horrible graphics. Horrible story. Enough said.

Here is a life lesson for you that will save you many, many, many hours of crap movies.

The Sequel is normally more crap than the original. If there is a 3rd or 4th installment - they are normally just milking it and will probably be worse than the second one.

There are exceptions, but for the few good movies you miss out on you will save many, many, many hours of shit viewing.

I mean seriously - how many people thought that the second series of Paris Hilton in the Simple life was better than the first ??? huh, huh, point proven.

[MisterD]

Here is a life lesson for you that will save you many, many, many hours of crap movies.

The Sequel is normally more crap than the original. If there is a 3rd or 4th installment - they are normally just milking it and will probably be worse than the second one.

There are exceptions, but for the few good movies you miss out on you will save many, many, many hours of shit viewing.

I mean seriously - how many people thought that the second series of Paris Hilton in the Simple life was better than the first ??? huh, huh, point proven.

Can anyone name a good sequel to a crap original? I don't mean a sequel that was better than an already good original such as Godfather 2...but a decent sequel to a truly crap first film?

[Maha]

Mark II (Its on Maori TV this week i think?) Cher!
A very very low budget rip off of Goodbye Pork Pie.

[Skunk]

Can anyone name a good sequel to a crap original? I don't mean a sequel that was better than an already good original such as Godfather 2...but a decent sequel to a truly crap first film?Star Trek :killingme

[avgas]

Lord of the Rings...
Loved the books, but the movie felt like a 3 year old was directing it.
"First we attack them"
"and then?"
"And then we get that"
"and then?"
"And then we do this"
"and then?"
"And then he dies and these things appear"
"and then?"
"And then this stuff happens".......

Nah just kidding its not the worse (but not my slice of cake).
Worst was 'Jumper'......i got 5 mins into that thing and turned it off. Cos sick of hearing a rich kid whine.

[kermit63]

Napoleon Dynamite.....Sadly, I watched it to the end. I thought it was so cringingly crap, that it would have to get better. My wife kept looking at me as if to say "are you really making me watch this", and I kept saying "I can turn it off if you want", but combined indecision saw us both watch the whole movie.

The one redeeming feature is that when I see teenagers wearing "Vote for Pedro" t-shirts, I atleast know who the hell Pedro is.

[Tank]

Napoleon Dynamite.....Sadly, I watched it to the end. I thought it was so cringingly crap, that it would have to get better. My wife kept looking at me as if to say "are you really making me watch this", and I kept saying "I can turn it off if you want", but combined indecision saw us both watch the whole movie.

The one redeeming feature is that when I see teenagers wearing "Vote for Pedro" t-shirts, I atleast know who the hell Pedro is.

Sad but true - watch it a second and third time - it does get funnier.

Love the cow being shot in front of the buss load of kids. Classic.

[gijoe1313]

Plan 9 from outer Space ... but I am a pyschotronic B-Z movie watcher, I love watching movies that are so bad they are good!

Attack of the killer Tomatoes
Killer Amazons in the Avocado Jungle of Death... oh the list can go on and on... :eek5:

EJ, you ain't seen nuffink yet! Watch 120 b-video movies in a month and then get back to me you lightweight! :lol:

[Bren]

Bad movie: THE MASK
Worse movie: SON OF THE MASK!

[Bren]

B grade sci fi are great movies...i love em all...the cornier the better

[martybabe]

Would you buggers stop putting me on the spot, I have no memory. err

Nightmare before Xmas is the only film I ever walked out on but I remember a lot of people leaving when Marlon Brando got the butter out in Last Tango In Paris.

As for sequels I took a mate to see Exorcist 1 and 2, which he'd never seen and we fucked the time up, so we watched 2 first. He was ready to go down the pub after 15 mins but we stuck it out and he fair crapped himself at exorcist 1.

[PrincessBandit]

Starship Troopers, yeah and Napoleon Dynamite (wtf?)

[Gubb]

Starship Troopers, yeah and Napoleon Dynamite (wtf?)

They are both AMAZING fillums.

[Timber020]

Citizen Kane

Saw it once, and it was painful. Future wife had a fairwell Do and the person had chosen to see citizen kane at the penthouse theatre. I told her I had already seen it but for her I would be willing to watch it again. We watched it and afterwards she said "that was so aweful, you must really love me."

[98tls]

Saving private Ryan,the first 20 secs rocked the rest of it was shite,the standoff between the Marines and the supposed Waffen SS soldiers after the wall fell in was enough for me,they all fell down and i switched channels.

[Timber020]

Saving private Ryan,the first 20 secs rocked the rest of it was shite,the standoff between the Marines and the supposed Waffen SS soldiers after the wall fell in was enough for me,they all fell down and i switched channels.

US army, not marines.:buggerd:

[BIGBOSSMAN]

'Schlindlers List', the worst fucking comedy I've ever seen. Didn't laugh once :angry:

[Usarka]

'Schlindlers List', the worst fucking comedy I've ever seen. Didn't laugh once :angry:

come on, it was a gas

[Skyryder]

What Lies Beneath. Sat through this jetting to the States. If I had a parachute I would have jumped out.

Waterworld. Kevin Costiner needed a flame thrower up his arse after this tedious piece of drivel.

Skyyrder

[Slingshot]

Eagle vs. Shark.

[Headbanger]

Tremors was a damn fine movie, A total classic.:first:




Worst for me......

went to the movies, It was the wife's pick, I didn't pay much attention to it, Until I realised it was a fucking remake of cinderilla, So, Not only did I hate every horrible painful second of the fuckin terrible and inhumane experience, I even knew what was coming next. Plus, NO HOT BITCHES TO LOOK AT.

Its been a decade, And I can still feel the burn. 10 points to the wife for sucking me into that shit.

Still, Last time I ever let her pick a movie for us to go see.

[Bren]

Speaking of bad movies there is one showing now on MGM (Sky ch 23) called "Brain Damage" Definately a "B" Grade.
Seems the plot is this guy has got a parasitic brain in him or something like that that seems to make him trip out!.
The scene I just saw when channel surfing was just bizzare....The lead guy is in a back alley behind a club with a bimbo who goes down on him to give him a blow job....instead of his u know what coming out a snake like thing came out and started eating her brain.....weird...remind me not to give anyone a blow job in a back alley!:buggerd:

[Hitcher]

Starship Troopers

Hmmm. Denise Richards...

[pzkpfw]

I don't tend to remember details so couldn't list all the bad movies I've seen.

But in terms of sheer dissappointment - I'd have to say the Matrix sequels.

Alas one can't un-see what has been seen. (Something to remember before clicking dodgy links.)

Luckily they'll fade in a few years, I'll watch the first again, and all will be right.



P.S. Starship Troopers was great.

[Wiki Drifter]

National Lampoon's Pledge This (staring Paris Hilton)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0417056/

Watched it on DVD as a dare from start to finish. Holy fuck it actually made BattleField Earth seem like a cinematic masterpiece.

[mister.koz]

I got dragged (literally) VERY hung over to the re-release of Grease with my gf at the time and her mate dancing and singing in the isles.

Turns out counseling doesn't always work.

O and the sound of music... i mean please think of the children.

[onearmedbandit]

Amateurs. With the right drugs there are no bad movies.

[TOTO]

Mouholan drive (except the scene with the two lesbians) was a waste of money and time

[howdamnhard]

Punch drunk love sucked,it almost improved when he bashed the guy with a tyre iron but then peetered off.Total waste of time.:sleep:

[FlangMasterJ]

Starship Troopers, yeah and Napoleon Dynamite (wtf?)

WTF!!!!? How old are you people?

These two movies are classics.

Starship Troopers was so different from anything else and the special effects were incredible.



Now Going Overboard with Adam Sandler is shit.

Also the Futurama movie is the most drawn out film ever. Painful!

[Steam]

Starship Troopers, yeah and Napoleon Dynamite (wtf?)

ARE YOU INSANE?
Napoleon Dynamite was profound, insightful. It's an existential treatise, at times downright metaphysical. AND hilarious. It is Certified Fresh on RottenTomatoes.
Starship Troopers was awesome too, ridiculous and over-the-top, but deliberately so, referencing B-grade Sci-fi films and WW2 patriotic propaganda.

Not liking those two films is like not enjoying the book Catch-22. If someone doesn't like Catch-22, there's something seriously, fundamentally wrong with the way they look at the world. Oh, that's a bit harsh really, but you get my drift.

[Krayy]

Fast and Furious 2 & 3

Bloarrrrrrrrrghhhhh!!!! :sick:

[-df-]

Southland Tales...wtf is up with that movie...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0405336/

Normally I can find good in almost any movie...but that one...nope. worst I've ever seen.

[kermit63]

Napoleon Dynamite was profound, insightful. It's an existential treatise, at times downright metaphysical.
I usually watch my movies with a glass of wine, hence have never got to "existential treatise" or "metaphysical" while viewing. What are you using to get the enhanced experience you speak of watching Napoleon Dynamite. Oh, and don't say Speights as a dweller of the deep South - I'm from Dunedin and that was a big part of my mispent youth and although I got into some out of this world states, never quite managed metaphysical, while on the turps.

[Harry33]

Southland Tales...wtf is up with that movie...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0405336/

Normally I can find good in almost any movie...but that one...nope. worst I've ever seen.

Yip I have to agree about Southland Tales. It sucked big time especially after such a good first film by the director (Donnie Darko).

I don't normally walk out on movies but "Johnny English" starring Rowan Atkinson took me to my breaking point.

[Tank]

OK - I had to google this - I DID NOT know the link.

Anyhow - worst movie ever - a porno called "Life in the fat lane" staring this 327kg beauty http://www.iafd.com/person.rme/perfid=Teighlor/gender=f/Teighlor.htm

link prob isnt the best idea for work either.

[hazard02]

Solaris was terrible. It sounded like it was going to be a cool sort of psycholgical thriller (in space!) but it only succeeded in boring me to tears.

But the #1 most horrible movie ever?
Alexander. Surely a movie about a guy who conquered half the world would be full of awesome battles right? The trailer made it seem so. Instead it was two short battles and hours of boring dialogue, made worse by the fact that it included a cast of thousands of oiled half-naked men who appeared in every shot.

[Usarka]

Anyhow - worst movie ever - a porno called "Life in the fat lane" staring this 327kg beauty http://www.iafd.com/person.rme/perfid=Teighlor/gender=f/Teighlor.htm

link prob isnt the best idea for work either.

Try a non-porn movie database! Like IMDB (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0804492/) - they have The Hottie and The Nottie as #1 worst, followed by Alien vs Hunter

[Tank]

Try a non-porn movie database!

Yeah and next I'll switch to decaffeinated coffee, and non fat creamer.

pfffft

(p/t)

[PrincessBandit]

WTF!!!!? How old are you people?



Probably old enough to be your granny, whippersnapper! :laugh:

[kevfromcoro]

GOTO..WWW.rotten.com
sick shit..........only went there once ............YUK

[nallac]

shit starship troopers is a classic.
Torque was one of the best bike comedy i've seen.(its a comedy isn't it?)

Worst movie would have to be Titanic, closely followed by Pearl Harbour

theres plenty more out there too.

[pzkpfw]

Ouch.

I just remembered "Showgirls".

[Ripperjon]

Showgirls was made for one purpose only and for that it did the job. More than once. Came out at just about the right time in my life!:spanking:

Ummm... worst film ever...

I really wanted to leave John Carpenter's "Vampires" now that is a fucking shit film. I sort of had to stay cos i was there with mates and was the designamanamated drivermerer. That was the first film i ever wanted to walk out of (except "Arachnophobia". That sucked for a 10yr old arachnophobic i can tell you).

These days though, there's more shit than good. And having worked in a couple of cinemas i've walked out of tons of movies now.

[Ripperjon]

Just watched "The Water Horse" BTW.

Loch Ness monster film made mostly down here in Queenstown.

SHITE

[avgas]

Amateurs. With the right drugs there are no bad movies.
Or SMOOTH surfaces

[avgas]

Chocolate......i really wanted sex so bad i sat though that whole movie.

[DarkLord]

Infested: Attack of the Killer Flies.

Starred Amy Jo Johnson (Pink Power Ranger, to those who remember) and was full of completely pointless nudity, horrible special effects, zombies that are full of flies and have no heads yet somehow can still see where they are going and best of all...

.... the flies would eat the human brains, and so gain their knowledge, so when they played music that the zombies listened to when they were humans, they'd start dancing.

Worst. Movie. Ever. I'd still like to grab a copy on DVD though just so I could show people just how horribly bad it is!

:buggerd:

[Tank]

Ouch.

I just remembered "Showgirls".

OI - BASTARD !!!!! I will not simply standby and have any bastard say anything bad about a movie with Demi Moore getting her kit off!

That is simply not acceptable. Now say 'sorry' or this goes INTERNATIONAL - serious - Im not fucking around here.






all said in good fun of course

[vifferman]

The worst movie I evee saw some of, was "Pret a Porter". A lady I worked with absolutely raved about it, so we went. Unfortunately, I failed to take account of two things: even though she was apparently intelligent, she was also a fashion victim, a librarian, and a ditz.

We managed to stay a while, in the vain hope it would get better, but thankfully we managed to escape after wasting less than half an hour of our lives.

The second worst movie was "Hollywood Suite", which was redeemed by only one (1!) scene where the character played by [some guy I can't recall the name of] is woken in his hotel room by a "come and pick me up from the airport" phone call from his wife. He is still very drunk, finds a naked, comatose woman in his bed, and attempts to dress her and remove her from the room. Him trying to put her pantyhose on her legs was hilarious.
The rest of this 'comedy' movie - despite having loads of 'stars' - was unfunny to the point of being very irritating.

[EJK]

Ok ummmm..... Whats a B-Grade movie? :crazy:

[Harry33]

OI - BASTARD !!!!! I will not simply standby and have any bastard say anything bad about a movie with Demi Moore getting her kit off!

That is simply not acceptable. Now say 'sorry' or this goes INTERNATIONAL - serious - Im not fucking around here.






all said in good fun of course

I think that Demi Moore movie was called "Striptease". She did have interesting boobies though.:rockon:

[chrisso]

Solaris was terrible. It sounded like it was going to be a cool sort of psycholgical thriller (in space!) but it only succeeded in boring me to tears.

But the #1 most horrible movie ever?
Alexander. Surely a movie about a guy who conquered half the world would be full of awesome battles right? The trailer made it seem so. Instead it was two short battles and hours of boring dialogue, made worse by the fact that it included a cast of thousands of oiled half-naked men who appeared in every shot.


Me too ; Aexander sucked big time . Not the worst movie ever but up there. Catwoman was pretty bad.

[avgas]

Ok ummmm..... Whats a B-Grade movie? :crazy:
The porn that an 8 year can reach in the video shop

[HenryDorsetCase]

for a long time the worst movie I had ever paid money to see was Blind Date (Bruce Willis and Kim Basinger) but that was EASILY trumped by the awful, tedious boring hateful and stupid Da Vinci Code.

And I LOVE Audrey Tatou.

[PrincessBandit]

Infested: Attack of the Killer Flies.

Starred Amy Jo Johnson (Pink Power Ranger, to those who remember) and was full of completely pointless nudity, horrible special effects, zombies that are full of flies and have no heads yet somehow can still see where they are going and best of all...

.... the flies would eat the human brains, and so gain their knowledge, so when they played music that the zombies listened to when they were humans, they'd start dancing.

Worst. Movie. Ever. I'd still like to grab a copy on DVD though just so I could show people just how horribly bad it is!

:buggerd:
Oh no, this sounds like one to watch with some mates and plenty of alcomaholic refreshments!

[Dodger]

I would say for me it's Epic Movie - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0799949/

Stopped watching it after 5minutes and went and changed my daughters dirty nappy. The nappy was more interesting than this movie. :sick:

What makes it worse is they then went and made a sequel, Meet The Spartans - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1073498/

[avgas]

Talented Mr Ripley
Watching was like plastic bags decompose.
It wasn't smart, it wasn't witty. It wasn't even a plot.
If i were to explain it in 1 word it would be "Dulldrum".
I would rather read a book.

[RantyDave]

The "Doom" movie.

Now, it was never going to be good, was it? But Doom did something quite remarkable: it sucked hugely without ever getting to the stage of a movie that sucks so much that the suckage itself is funny. That is what makes Doom the worst movie ever.

Dave