slofox
3rd October 2008, 11:56
To the driver of the Dark Blue Toyota Starlet, *PH368...between Cambridge and Hamilton this morning, circa 10.00am:
Dear Sir,
1. I note with some concern that you are visually impaired. May I suggest that you get yourself to an optometrist ASAP before you kill yourself? Or someone else even?
2. I also note with concern that your vehicle is missing its indicator lights. Again, may I suggest that you have this matter seen to forthwith? Then other road user could be informed of your intention to swerve across in front of them as you change lanes before you actually do the deed......that way they can get out of your way....
3. I also noted that you were busy sorting stuff out on the passenger seat beside you as you hurtled down the Expressway at some 120km/hr, whilst weaving in and out of both lanes as noted above. Would it be possible for you to get your arse out of bed five minutes earlier in the morning so you can do this chore before you attempt to drive?
4. To cap it off, I was right there behind you when we arrived in Hamilton, both (through some miracle) still intact. Your efforts gained you precisely NO extra time. I got there at the same time as you despite being a pussycat and riding safely. Think about that.
5. Finally, I noted that you were not a pimple faced youth with a reversed baseball cap on your head and a major concern about your sexual prowess. You looked old enough to have more sense than you displayed.....but maybe you are just fuckin' senile??????
This notice brought to you with compliments of Hillcrest Fine Wines, in the interests of Community Road Safety.
Dear Sir,
1. I note with some concern that you are visually impaired. May I suggest that you get yourself to an optometrist ASAP before you kill yourself? Or someone else even?
2. I also note with concern that your vehicle is missing its indicator lights. Again, may I suggest that you have this matter seen to forthwith? Then other road user could be informed of your intention to swerve across in front of them as you change lanes before you actually do the deed......that way they can get out of your way....
3. I also noted that you were busy sorting stuff out on the passenger seat beside you as you hurtled down the Expressway at some 120km/hr, whilst weaving in and out of both lanes as noted above. Would it be possible for you to get your arse out of bed five minutes earlier in the morning so you can do this chore before you attempt to drive?
4. To cap it off, I was right there behind you when we arrived in Hamilton, both (through some miracle) still intact. Your efforts gained you precisely NO extra time. I got there at the same time as you despite being a pussycat and riding safely. Think about that.
5. Finally, I noted that you were not a pimple faced youth with a reversed baseball cap on your head and a major concern about your sexual prowess. You looked old enough to have more sense than you displayed.....but maybe you are just fuckin' senile??????
This notice brought to you with compliments of Hillcrest Fine Wines, in the interests of Community Road Safety.