My little angel...

[XxKiTtiExX]

As some of you may or may not know I've been not riding for the past goodness knows how long due to the fact that I was pregnant.. I felt this was the best option for myself and my baby..

On the 14th of November I was admitted to Whangarei hospital after going into premature labour, and then later transferred to National in Auckland...

Sadly... on the 23rd of November at 6.36am I delivered my precious baby girl at just 31 weeks.. Weighing in at a mere 960grams... Complications beyond our control meant that she didn't make it through the birth...

I guess why I'm sitting here posting this now is to not only save the "hows the baby" questions... But also to thank those who have been there for me through out my pregnancy, those who put up with my raging hormones and late night constant baby chat.. And thankyou to those who have supported me unconditionally during this extremely difficult time in my life...

I huge thankyou also goes out to Gwinch (Jon) hon thankyou so much for being there and visiting me it meant alot.. Even though I quite literally ended up throwing you out.. I'm sorry for that..



R.I.P my little angel xox




*theresa*

[Trudes]

I'm sorry to hear that hun, all the best :hug:

[Mrs Busa Pete]

Oh shit i'm so so sorry to here that kittie i didn't even know you where pregnant
I wish i was closer to give you a big :hug: but know you are going to be in my thoughts love. You make sure you take care of yourself and if you ever need anything please just ask.

R.I.P little one.

[Nasty]

Hunny, my thoughts are so with you at this time ... I know what you are going through is so hard ... if you need anything please let me know ... my heart just aches for you.:(

[hayd3n]

sad to hear about that
i have a friend with similar complications and can see the pain shes goin thru ,
i wouldn't wish this upon anyone .
forever in you heart..

[portokiwi]

Our hearts go out to you Theresa, You have everyone here from KB who feel for your loss. God bless

[Mom]

Very sad to read this Kitty, terrible thing to happen. Lean on the people close to you, take good care of you. My thoughts are with you in this very sad time.

Anne

[jrandom]

I was sorry to hear the news, T. Life can be cruel sometimes, eh?

[stify]

so sorry to hear about your loss kitty

[Trumpess]

My most sincere condolences Theresa. That is extremley sad news.
Your in my thoughts, take care. :hug:

[sunhuntin]

aw hell! you are all in my thoughts. what a sad thing to happen.

RIP little angel.

[SixPackBack]

Condolences Kittie.

[Paul in NZ]

Vicki and I are very sorry for our loss. The death of an infant is always hard to accept or understand - there is a wrongness somehow. Having said that - lifes more complicated than we can express, all we can say for sure is that we are all in it together and we would like you to know that we feel and share your pain. Stay strong - our thoughts are with you.

Paul n Vicki

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience -- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death. Robert Fulghum:

[Maha]

Truely sorry to read this Theresa, My sister went through the same thing in 1984. Her baby boy lived for 9 hours, I went to see see him at the Funeral Directors, in fact, I went to see him a few times. I was amazed and filled with a disbelief emotion. At 26 weeks, he was so so tiny but everything was formed (dont know how else to put it) I remember his head was no bigger than an apple and even his fingernails had those half moon things happening. I will never forget what I was looking at, and remember thinking to myself that, there was no way he could have survived, just to small. That was the naive thinking of a 22 year old buts its what I thought.

Love and good wishes......Mark

[RantyDave]

Oh God, I'm sorry. I can't even pretend to know what it's like - just make sure you're surrounded by people that care for you right now OK?

Dave

[CookMySock]

oh dear. 8-(

Steve

[Monamie]

My thoughts are with you hon.

[vifferman]

Sorry to hear your bad news. :(
My condolences to you, sweetie.

[Skunk]

My condolences T. I can't even imagine what you're going through.

Rest in peace little one.

[gijoe1313]

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. May you learn to smile and laugh again when the time is right and you are ready to. :(

[PrincessBandit]

So sad to hear. Thank you for being brave enough to share this with us. Most words really are quite redundant at a time like this but please look after yourself; cherish the good memories and what time you did get to spend with your little girl.
Thinking of you.

[ManDownUnder]

I am so sorry to hear this Kitty.
MDU

[raftn]

We lost one at 39 weeks, so can understand your grief. Thoughts are with you.

[LilSel]

Sending warm wishes your way hun. Sorry to hear of your loss.

[Al]

Thoughts are with you T, stay strong!

Al

[Magua]

Sorry to hear of your loss.

[Curious_AJ]

my thoughts are with you.

[howdamnhard]

My condolences and prayers are with you.

[XxKiTtiExX]

Thankyou all... Just amazing how everything can go from perfect, and turn custard shaped so quickly...

Just another one of lifes hurdles, in a cruel attempt at pushing you in the right direction in life... Which ever direction that is...

[Waxxa]

whoa!!! gutted for you. My condolences

[fire eyes]

ohhh kittee .. I am so so sorry to hear this :weep:

Blessings little angel .. love Aunty Fire xoxox

[chanceyy]

So sorry to hear this news Kittie, hugs to you

RIP little Angel

[MyGSXF]

I am very saddened to hear your news.. :( deepest condolences & a hug for you Kittie..

R.I.P precious little one...

[Storm]

So so sorry to hear that. My thoughts are with you and I hope you are surrounded by love and support through this difficult time.

[Smokin]

Thats no good at all. Sorry to hear that mate.

[karla]

May every tear that falls bring you one day closer to recovery. A loss this great will take time; be gentle on yourself. To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under the heaven ~

[klingon]

Oh kittie! :( I'm so sad to hear about your loss. Thank you for being brave enough to share your story with us here.

Hugs for you and your little angel.

[Number One]

Sorry this is so late I am just catching up in KB land...been trying to live a bit more in the 'real world' lately.

Nothing I can say will ease the pain or be of any comfort to you I am sure, but what I will say is that my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss Kitti and I hope that 2009 brings you something really special :hug:

RIP little girl.
Heaven has another angel.

[XxKiTtiExX]

Sorry this is so late I am just catching up in KB land...been trying to live a bit more in the 'real world' lately.

Nothing I can say will ease the pain or be of any comfort to you I am sure, but what I will say is that my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss Kitti and I hope that 2009 brings you something really special :hug:

RIP little girl.
Heaven has another angel.


We've had plenty of time now to let it all sink in and come to terms with our loss. Having answers has made that possible, and I'm so thankful that I know "why." She was perfect, everything I could have wanted but she just wasn't meant to be with us at this time. In the start I was terrified of giving birth, I've been there and I know now that theres things far scarier than giving birth. Shes our baby, our first born and I'd still do it all again in a heartbeat. :love:

2009 will hopefully bring me that something really special that I've wanted for so long all over again. But hopefully it all goes as planned this time with no more nasty suprises. We shall see.. Fingers crossed!!

*HugZ*

[Number One]

In the start I was terrified of giving birth, I've been there and I know now that theres things far scarier than giving birth. Shes our baby, our first born and I'd still do it all again in a heartbeat. :love:

2009 will hopefully bring me that something really special that I've wanted for so long all over again. But hopefully it all goes as planned this time with no more nasty suprises. We shall see.. Fingers crossed!!
Yeah labour really isn't as bad as one might expect once you are in there doing it you can only but go through with it eh? Nought all you can do when the bod decides it's time.

BTW don't get me wrong - I was screaming for the epidural at one point but in the context of bringing your baby into the world yeah it's a small thing and hell I would even do it again and I'm a big sook!

Sending you positive vibes and crossing my fingers for that special something to come your way again soon. :hug:

[XxKiTtiExX]

Yeah labour really isn't as bad as one might expect once you are in there doing it you can only but go through with it eh? Nought all you can do when the bod decides it's time.

BTW don't get me wrong - I was screaming for the epidural at one point but in the context of bringing your baby into the world yeah it's a small thing and hell I would even do it again and I'm a big sook!

Sending you positive vibes and crossing my fingers for that special something to come your way again soon. :hug:

Its not that bad at all, your natural instinct to scream your lungs out definately takes over. Once babies out you completely forget about it (that said I didn't have to push out an 8 pound baby). It isn't how alot of people made it out to be thats for sure, only thing I'll be scared about next time is not being handed a screaming baby.

Fingers AND toes crossed lol

[Curious_AJ]

with a new year, hopefully a new life ^_^

[H00dz]

hey kittie, like everyone who has already posted, my heatfelt condolences to you and your man, May 2009 bring your joy and happiness, and may you remember always the blessing your precious baby gave despite the shortness of time that you shared

my luv

H00dz

[ynot slow]

Gone but never forgotten,as a mere male we seem to bear the brunt of the emotional rollercoaster,my wife said after she had had 2 stillbirths her then tosser husband said after each birth,tough we'll have another and went to the pub.She managed a live birth after the first(still born) and before the second one,and more after.Sometimes you do wonder if they survived what would their quality of life be,almost like nature making her mind up for you.

[Brownbikerbabe]

I send the warmest hugs all the way from Canada!

[XxKiTtiExX]

hey kittie, like everyone who has already posted, my heatfelt condolences to you and your man, May 2009 bring your joy and happiness, and may you remember always the blessing your precious baby gave despite the shortness of time that you shared

my luv

H00dz

2009 will bring us everything we have ever wanted, and then some. :hug:


Gone but never forgotten,as a mere male we seem to bear the brunt of the emotional rollercoaster,my wife said after she had had 2 stillbirths her then tosser husband said after each birth,tough we'll have another and went to the pub.She managed a live birth after the first(still born) and before the second one,and more after.Sometimes you do wonder if they survived what would their quality of life be,almost like nature making her mind up for you.

Alot of people have said to me "oh well just have another one". Sometimes you want to just scream at them and tell them to go and almost carry to term, then come back with the "oh well" comments. I've had others tell me I shouldn't have another baby, and that I should have gone straight back to work. Even attempting to tell me how I should be feeling. I've had inlaws make nasty comments claiming what happened as being my fault as the mother (completely untrue what happened was beyond anyones control, we did NOTHING wrong, I did nothing wrong, why people can't get that into their heads I just do not know). We've taken the time to make up our minds and have decided that yes we will be trying to have another baby, despite what others feel we should/shouldn't be doing. And I really do hope it happens sooner rather than later. No way will it ever fix whats happened. I do realize that. It doesn't and never will replace the little girl that we have lost but it will definately bring us both alot of happiness and we will definately cherish having our second child even more so (spoilt brat in the making). :niceone:

[Patrick]

I didn't read the whole thread.... too sad. 2009 has just got to be a better year. All the best to you.

[mashman]

Alot of people have said to me "oh well just have another one". Sometimes you want to just scream at them and tell them to go and almost carry to term, then come back with the "oh well" comments. I've had others tell me I shouldn't have another baby, and that I should have gone straight back to work. Even attempting to tell me how I should be feeling. I've had inlaws make nasty comments claiming what happened as being my fault as the mother (completely untrue what happened was beyond anyones control, we did NOTHING wrong, I did nothing wrong, why people can't get that into their heads I just do not know). We've taken the time to make up our minds and have decided that yes we will be trying to have another baby, despite what others feel we should/shouldn't be doing. And I really do hope it happens sooner rather than later. No way will it ever fix whats happened. I do realize that. It doesn't and never will replace the little girl that we have lost but it will definately bring us both alot of happiness and we will definately cherish having our second child even more so (spoilt brat in the making). :niceone:

I watched my sister in law tear herself apart because of his families criticisms of how she led her life when she lost hers at 36 weeks etc... She's diabetic and always takes good care of herself and really really struggled. Such a total and utter shitty attitude, I still can't comprehend it... She did the SANDS group thing and found it of limited help, realising that everyone feels differently, reacts differently and handles grief differently, which I think in turn helped her get her head around what had happened. She has since gone on to have 3 perfeclty healthy kids, never another complication... All the best for your all of your futures(aren't you supposed to spoil 'em all anyway) ...

[scumdog]

Just found this thread while boringly sifting through KB, now wish I hadn't.

Condolences and hope '09 is a better year for you.