British Bike Owners lament

I asked Sidknee if he had taken his Norton Atlas out recently.

I hope he doesn't mind me printing the reply but its gold.

I went out on Norton for a ride the other day, gorgeous, humming along with
the new primary drive making not a sound, sunny day and the bike running so
well - I was in love again. Got as far as TePuke, and a little cough but
you get that with British twins so not a worry. Tauranga two coughs but
that is OK - they do that British twins. Just the other side of Tauranga,
in the middle of nowhere, the coughs gathered up into one big cough that
concluded in silence. The nice warm day became a stinking hot day, no
shade, carb in bits, trucks thrashing past, sweat pouring down, tank off,
plugs out, oil over my best jeans - all of a sudden the I was not in love
again! 6 hours later the bike was back in the corner of the shed after a
trip in my van and a lone of a decent (Jap) bike from a friend - and that is
where it is staying for a fair while. The worst thing was my wife
questioned why I was going out on the Norton when I have so many reliable
BMWs in the shed and I told her not to be so stupid 'I had fixed it'. So no
I won't be going to the Norton thing for quite a while - thanks for the
offer.

Thanks for sharing that little gem Volty..........I nearly made the same mistake by pursuing a couple of Matchies, before I was finally tempted to follow the "Rising Sun"............ haven't regretted the change of direction..............what did we see in that Pommy stuff way back when!

When I went for a ride on my XLV750, my wife would ask where the tie downs and ramp were....she had to go and get me a few times.

What did we see in the Pommy stuff ? For $300 you could get a brand new Honda 50...or you could get a '57 T110 with new 11:1 pistons, new carbs, loud pipes that was way more bike than you could ride. No way was I going to ride a Honda 50 when I could get something like that for the same price! I am so glad I didn't ride Jap shit in those day.

It's a funny old world. I owned my Interstate for nigh on 10 years. It never failed to get me home.
I won't mention changing head gaskets on a regular basis because of the porous head, the seal behind the points that could be a slight issue [ The Rita fixed most of that ].
A full rebuild was required after I rode it from Ak to Huntly trailing a cloud of smoke, [I had to get back for work ] , as I merember it one piston had partially collapsed & totally buggered that bore requiring a resleeve . Bloody thing still kept going

If we are talking Nortons, my 99 only let me down twice. Once it broke a spring in the gear selector mechanism, left me stuck in top gear. I don't remember being stuck in any way, it was at work....maybe I got a lift home, or walked to my mothers place most likely. 2nd time it broke a clutch cable at the gas station top of the Albany hill....with a sidecar on it. I rode it to Matakana with wife and baby on board, left it there and came back next week with a cable.

The Triton blew a gearbox on Skyhigh Rd, got a lift back to Panmure with Highway 61. The B31 broke down at Xmas twice - seized one year, lost a clutch stud the next year...had to hitch both times. The Rickman got a flat front tyre on Skyhigh Rd. The M20 blew a head gasket at Putaruru. And that's about the sum total of my British bike breakdowns, lots of bikes over many years. I was always working on them though, but I see that as a positive,not a negative.

I might know where there is a Norton Atlas under a blankie if you guys wanna relive your motor cycle yoof.

Nipple pulled off the clutch cable at The Tron coming back from the Cold Kiwi with my future wife on board . Started off on a very slight downwards slope, popped it into first & did not stop until Epsom . Kept idling up to lights in first hoping they would turn green, my prayers were invariably answered. Never have been since, guess I used up all my brownie points..
That Atlas looks pretty tidy, hmmm.

Went from Jawas ( poor student) to a BSA A7 then to BMWs and Hondas. I have continuously owned BMWs since 1974. No breakdowns.......

Strike now while the owner is depressed.
Wanna buy a 500cc Moto Guzzi mista?

Buy a Guzzi.

Jeez , What did I ever do to you !!!

C'mon, you need a new engine you can take to bits, put back together, take to bits and so on... cheap Post Classic racer.....numnumnum

I sold a heap of Guzzis. Knew too much about them to own one though. Cheap classic racing? I sold my Triton because it was costing a fortune to build for one or two "races" a year. The BMW and MZ will see me out. Wouldn't mind a TL250 or a CB 500 but not at the TM prices.......Anyway I have a conservation lodge facility to rebuild and that is a life sentence.....

Remembered some more stuff - sifting back through 45 years of happenings I can get a bit lost sometimes. When the B31 seized, I borrowed my mothers Mini and came back home and came back with a 500cc barrel,piston and cyl head, converting my B31 into a B33. The piston failed at windy ridge, left it in a shed, hitched home on the back of a passing Ducati and came back with a B31 barrel and head, and a Triumph 650 piston. Both are 71mm with the same gudgeon pin, but a lower height on the Triumph. The B31 also broke a valve spring and bent a valve at Hot Water Beach, I stayed the night and my mate went home and came back with a valve and spring. The only times my British bikes were brought home on a trailer was twice with the Triton, once with a flat tyre that I nursed to 10 km from home, and when it blew the gearbox, and the M20 had to be picked up from Putaruru with the headgasket gone....but at the time I thought it was a piston, it made that much noise. I could've done the headgasket in 20 minutes, but the trailer was there.

Wanna buy a 500cc Moto Guzzi mista?

I quite like the V50, I'm sure it wouldn't lead me into poverty like the MHR either

Nice to hear all these fond memories being recovered from the ether guys.

Besides the unreliability factor, my main grips are the amount of vibration associated with the parallel twin concept, and their legendary culture of oil loss wherever they were parked. Wasn't supposed to be a total loss system.