How do I reclaim my man space?

**Mom** · 14th June 2009, 12:11

Originally Posted by MsKABC

You think that's bad? Try living with someone who insists on the toilet lid being left down all the time!

Have you ever put glad wrap over the toilet bowl, then put the seat down? Farken funny as

We off to Puhoi for lunch, want to come?

**MSTRS:Me** · 14th June 2009, 12:12

You could always try painting up some pingpong balls ala...

Pop them into the bowl - no self-respecting woman will want them looking up while she...

**MsKABC** · 14th June 2009, 12:13

Originally Posted by Mom

Have you ever put glad wrap over the toilet bowl, then put the seat down? Farken funny as

Oooooh - good idea.

Talk about missed opportunities!

Originally Posted by Mom

We off to Puhoi for lunch, want to come?

I would love to, but there is no babysitter and I have things to do today

**Fatt Max** · 14th June 2009, 13:43

Ah mate, this has got to the saddest story EVER on KB.

Tricky situation to resolve. Probabably the best way is to ensure herself does not want to enter the toilet in the firts place. A few suggestions are:

1. Place a sign on the dooy saying 'Dirty Protest in Progress'

2. Find a few pictures of this female and stick them on the toilet walls. Then, mix some flour and water together until it forms a spoof like consistency, flick some blobs onto the pictures and round off with a few bits of toilet paper. She will think you are having a good old sherman in there and will NEVER return.

3. A taped loop of two guys sounding like they are shagging playing continuously behind the closed door should keep her away, otherwise a mans voice and a donkey eee-ooorrr-ing would do the trick.

4. Tell her my toilet is fucked and I am on my way over now with a guts full of beer, cheese balls, a chicken vindaloo and three boiled cabbages.

Sympathise with you mate, had the same happen to me many years ago when some tart thought she would move in to my flat. Got home one night and there was a fucking pot plant in the lounge where my Turkish bong used to be. Needless to say, she was shown the door very quickly.

Good luck bro

**SARGE** · 14th June 2009, 13:47

Originally Posted by Fatt Max

Ah mate, this has got to the saddest story EVER on KB.

Tricky situation to resolve. Probabably the best way is to ensure herself does not want to enter the toilet in the firts place. A few suggestions are:

1. Place a sign on the dooy saying 'Dirty Protest in Progress'

2. Find a few pictures of this female and stick them on the toilet walls. Then, mix some flour and water together until it forms a spoof like consistency, flick some blobs onto the pictures and round off with a few bits of toilet paper. She will think you are having a good old sherman in there and will NEVER return.

3. A taped loop of two guys sounding like they are shagging playing continuously behind the closed door should keep her away, otherwise a mans voice and a donkey eee-ooorrr-ing would do the trick.

4. Tell her my toilet is fucked and I am on my way over now with a guts full of beer, cheese balls, a chicken vindaloo and three boiled cabbages.

Sympathise with you mate, had the same happen to me many years ago when some tart thought she would move in to my flat. Got home one night and there was a fucking pot plant in the lounge where my Turkish bong used to be. Needless to say, she was shown the door very quickly.

Good luck bro

5) get an eel... let it live in the bowl

she wont be back

**martybabe** · 14th June 2009, 16:50

Originally Posted by Mom

Have you ever put glad wrap over the toilet bowl, then put the seat down? Farken funny as

?

We did that years ago in the ladies toilet in the fire station, the cleaner never noticed and did a spectacular number two. Man she went apeshit with knobs on

Thanks everyone some bloody good suggestions and laughs, wish me luck in my quest to return the alpha male status to the smallest room, catch you all soon, Tata for now. xxx

**Mom** · 14th June 2009, 16:52

Originally Posted by martybabe

We did that years ago in the ladies toilet in the fire station, the cleaner never noticed and did a spectacular number two. Man she went apeshit with knobs on

That is so not funny

Terrible thing to do to someone eh?

**The Pastor** · 14th June 2009, 18:54

. .

**Mom** · 14th June 2009, 18:56

Originally Posted by renegade master

silly cartoon

I think you should knit him a toilet seat cover actually

**Pedrostt500** · 14th June 2009, 20:55

Ok if ya havent reclaimed the blokes space yet ya need to bring out the Thermo Nuclear Wepons of Mass Distruction, as advised above remove air freshiner, with disposible extreemly long pole, Then seal of all ventilation to said space with heat resistant RTV, go out and have a Goood Curry, your Uncle Fat Max may assist you in advice of this nature, drink a dozen largers, Then the following day reclaim your mans space with the ghost of the curry and lagers, after you have finnished laying said Ghost to rest, make sure that the man space door is firmly closed after wards, check that oil stain that looks abit like Jimmy Hendrix if you squint and look in a certain wayis still there and has not been removed.

**Ixion** · 14th June 2009, 20:59

Originally Posted by SARGE

5) get an eel... let it live in the bowl

she wont be back

eel would work.

'Cept, eels is bloody stupid contrary things, bugger'd probably try to swim away down the S bend. Only thing stupider and more contrary than an eel is a camel (not to mention smelly). Don't care how good they are at mathematics, I reckon they're all dirty evil smelling vicious bastards.

**peasea** · 14th June 2009, 20:59

Originally Posted by Pedrostt500

Ok if ya havent reclaimed the blokes space yet ya need to bring out the Thermo Nuclear Wepons of Mass Distruction, as advised above remove air freshiner, with disposible extreemly long pole, Then seal of all ventilation to said space with heat resistant RTV, go out and have a Goood Curry, your Uncle Fat Max may assist you in advice of this nature, drink a dozen largers, Then the following day reclaim your mans space with the ghost of the curry and lagers, after you have finnished laying said Ghost to rest, make sure that the man space door is firmly closed after wards, check that oil stain that looks abit like Jimmy Hendrix if you squint and look in a certain wayis still there and has not been removed.

You have a stain that looks like Jimi Hendrix?

I love you, and want to have your babies!

**peasea** · 14th June 2009, 21:00

Originally Posted by Ixion

eel would work.