This scares the shit out of me

[Spuds1234]

Heres hoping the other half doesnt read this.

She really wants to get into motorcycling. She’s ridden on the back of my bikes plenty of times. I have no problems with this, but now she really wants to get a bike of her own and to tell the truth it really scares me. No shit. Its the last thing I thought I would be thinkin. I thought I would be over the moon.

I cant help be worried about how I would face up to her parents if something happened to her. Im going to be honest here (and hope she doesn’t read this) but when I go anywhere with her in the car (her driving) Im generally on edge. Her driving scares me. Not because she cant drive, but because of what she misses or what she doesn’t see until its uncomfortably to late for me. Many times I have pointed out something or actually told her to look out because someone has pulled out in front of her and she hasn’t seen it as quick as me. Maybe this is a hang up I have about either not being in control when she is driving or having to predict or see what cars are doing as early as possible to avoid any problems when riding a bike (which is all I know as I have never driven a car before).

I know her mother isn’t to keen on her getting a bike (from what the other half says). Im not sure how her father feels because he used to ride and he had his fair share of accidents too. I just know that if something happened to her I would feel guilty as hell for helping her into riding.

What am I to do? Your thoughts would be appreciated.

[varminter]

Good grief, I know what you mean. I think this is one for the girls to answer.

[BASS-TREBLE]

Oh Shit...

[AD345]

You say:

"babe - I think its great that you want to get your licence and a bike. It's going to take a while and will need some really good advice. What say I sgn us both up to some riding lessons and we do them together?"

after that its all gravy

[Mikkel]

Mate, you can not - and do not want to - live life for someone else. If she want's to get into bikes that is awesome, if you have any concerns just encourage her to get as much coaching and training as possible (not by you, someone who's not personally involved).

There will be other people out there who have worse observation skills than you girlfriend who have had a long and happy biking career.

[BMWST?]

i beleive her observation and anticipation skills will be enhanced by proper training.I think proper training sets the outlook on riding from the start...

[rocketman1]

you need to behonest with her,I believe that you need to tell her that you think that she may be a bit casual in her driving habits, and that it needs to change once she gets on a bike. I dont think you should stop her, she will be nervous once she is on a bike, this will automatically make her much more cautious and aware. One thing I have found from riding bikes is exactly that, it makes you much more aware.
I let my brother ride my other bike after not ridden for 30 years, he was shit scared he wouldnt go over 80 km/h, he was worried about dogs and animals running into the road. yet when he was young you could not stop him from speeding on his old 750 2/stroke kawasaki, how time changes things..
You cannot stop her, you just have to warn her of the dangers, she will do the rest.I wish my wife would ride a bike.

[Katman]

Invent a 'game' you can both play while in the car called Hazard Identification.

May sound stupid but if it teachs her observation skills then you both win.

[dpex]

Heres hoping the other half doesnt read this.

She really wants to get into motorcycling. She’s ridden on the back of my bikes plenty of times. I have no problems with this, but now she really wants to get a bike of her own and to tell the truth it really scares me. No shit. Its the last thing I thought I would be thinkin. I thought I would be over the moon.

I cant help be worried about how I would face up to her parents if something happened to her. Im going to be honest here (and hope she doesn’t read this) but when I go anywhere with her in the car (her driving) Im generally on edge. Her driving scares me. Not because she cant drive, but because of what she misses or what she doesn’t see until its uncomfortably to late for me. Many times I have pointed out something or actually told her to look out because someone has pulled out in front of her and she hasn’t seen it as quick as me. Maybe this is a hang up I have about either not being in control when she is driving or having to predict or see what cars are doing as early as possible to avoid any problems when riding a bike (which is all I know as I have never driven a car before).

I know her mother isn’t to keen on her getting a bike (from what the other half says). Im not sure how her father feels because he used to ride and he had his fair share of accidents too. I just know that if something happened to her I would feel guilty as hell for helping her into riding.

What am I to do? Your thoughts would be appreciated.

I'm just totally amazed that sundry of the 'ladies' here haven't screamed.

Allow me, on their behalf. YOU ARROGANT PRICK!

Where did you get the right to PRESUME' the girl can't learn to ride, and maybe even better than you.

It's not you, nor her parents, of any other arsehole with innate mysoginistic feelings which matter here. Here is a PERSON, not a female, who wants to ride.

Would you have the same reservations if it was your little brother wanting to ride? Nope!

But the 'little woman' barefoot, pregnant and at the stove, as all good shielas should be, but doesn't want to be, freaks you out, Right?

You arrogant prick!

I can't believe I'm reading such shit in 2009!

[lankyman]

Just tell her man...that's what I did. When she said she wanted a bike I laughed at her and reminded her of a certain instance of driving the wrong way around a round-about.

[Tigadae]

Wait till she stars shopping on trade me and bikers shops, for the cool biker chick gears that are now available in good old kiwi land, spending your money and gaining new ridding skills, the future is not looking bright for you,

[Katman]

....usual dpex bullshit.......

So it's wrong to be concerned about someone else's welfare now?

[Spuds1234]

Sorry guys I didnt want to make it seem like I didnt want her to get into riding. I know it came out a bit like that.

The point I was trying to make is that Im worried for her safety. While I had considered that she will have to get better, it is the "before she gets better" that scares me.

I wanted this thread to be more about me, not her. Im scared, not her. She couldnt be more happier and Im definitely not stopping her. Im helping her the best I can. Ive given her gear that fits (near enough that the padding wont twist around in an accident although she still needs to get a helmet), Im teaching the basics of riding off road first of easy bikes to ride. Im trying to remove all road blocks in her way.

This is MY hang up not hers. IM scared for HER. I dont want to pass that on to her incase it stops her doing what she wants to do.

[Muppet]

I'm just totally amazed that sundry of the 'ladies' here haven't screamed.

Allow me, on their behalf. YOU ARROGANT PRICK!

Where did you get the right to PRESUME' the girl can't learn to ride, and maybe even better than you.

It's not you, nor her parents, of any other arsehole with innate mysoginistic feelings which matter here. Here is a PERSON, not a female, who wants to ride.

Would you have the same reservations if it was your little brother wanting to ride? Nope!

But the 'little woman' barefoot, pregnant and at the stove, as all good shielas should be, but doesn't want to be, freaks you out, Right?

You arrogant prick!

I can't believe I'm reading such shit in 2009!

Total over reaction. The guy's got the balls to ask for help and you erupt into a tirade of insults and slander. I think he would have reservations if it were his little bother actually. In my experience, I find the people doing the criticising are generally the worst offenders, a bit like a reformed smoker.

[Harvd]

I'm just totally amazed that sundry of the 'ladies' here haven't screamed.

Allow me, on their behalf. YOU ARROGANT PRICK!

Where did you get the right to PRESUME' the girl can't learn to ride, and maybe even better than you.

It's not you, nor her parents, of any other arsehole with innate mysoginistic feelings which matter here. Here is a PERSON, not a female, who wants to ride.

Would you have the same reservations if it was your little brother wanting to ride? Nope!

But the 'little woman' barefoot, pregnant and at the stove, as all good shielas should be, but doesn't want to be, freaks you out, Right?

You arrogant prick!

I can't believe I'm reading such shit in 2009!

Woah chill out man, im in the same situation with a good mate of mine who if you replaced gf with friend and all the shes with hes would fit perfectly in the o/p. For me its the fear of me looking to be the cause if he did something stupid, as i naturally would, as im the only person he knows on a bike.

but yeah. you can only help where needed and try to get them into it in the safest way possible, after that it up to them