Email Help

**Mom** · 15th October 2009, 19:04

There is an outside chance that Maha just called you lot a bunch of "fuken wankers"

**MadDuck** · 15th October 2009, 19:07

Originally Posted by Mom

There is an outside chance that Maha just called you lot a bunch of "fuken wankers"

Just a "chance"? Damn i must try harder

**Maha** · 15th October 2009, 19:44

Originally Posted by doc

OMG what are you doing to do when he finds out you can txt on the little phone thingys ?

Originally Posted by MadDuck

Sssssshhhhh .... dont tell him about those things!

Just for your information I found it while I was in the shower.....

Or put it another way, I was told, where it was while in the shower..

The email that is, I know where everything else is in the shower...

**doc** · 15th October 2009, 20:09

Originally Posted by Maha

Just for your information I found it while I was in the shower.....

Or put it another way, I was told, where it was while in the shower..

The email that is, I know where everything else is in the shower...

So while your playing with things in the shower , you find stuff, sort of like things... pop up. Does Mom know about this ? mmmmm

**Taz** · 15th October 2009, 20:19

Has he still got the boxes the computer came in......

Actual dialog of a former Email Customer Support employee:

"KB computer assistant; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Email."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in Email, or did you get out?" >

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

".......Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

".......Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle, it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.

Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

Sorry Maha.... Could happen to the best of us.