How dumb are you, or were you?

[TwoSeven]

I have two that really annoyed me.

1st was parking motorcycle in busy area in london, going in and waiting half an hour with customer to pick up a parcel. Came out and found bike still running, unlocked with keys in ignition.

2nd was trying to drive off in a public area with disc lock still attached (done that several times).

[DMNTD:Me]

Was 17 and just bought a GT750,my first bike.
I thought I was the ducks nuts Had a few drinks(pissed as!) and thought I'd show off...went to kick start it and fell over with the bloody heavy arsed beast on top of me! ...in front of the Crew...what a tosser!
Never have drunk 'n rode since!

[Unit:Me]

Was 17 and just bought a GT750,my first bike.
I thought I was the ducks nuts Had a few drinks(pissed as!) and thought I'd show off...went to kick start it and fell over with the bloody heavy arsed beast on top of me! ...in front of the Crew...what a tosser!
Never have drunk 'n rode since!

Me, I have a habit of forgetting to put my side stand down at petrol pumps, and dropping my bike on them. Have done it once, twice, three times, yep, never learn. Last time a bunch of kids in a nearby car just kept cracking up, making me even madder. And yep, done it with the Duke too!!!

[Jamiepo]

Well mine are both off road crashes.
I was riding an old honda 3 wheeler on the northern end of Papamoa beach, it is basically empty out there so it is good fun going flat tack out there!! I was running full throttle in top gear and someone had dug a HUGE hole in the middle of the beach, I swerved, went up on 2 wheels so I over compensated and woke up 15 minutes later about 15 foot away from my bike missing both shoes and with a mouth full of sand. I had come off the back hitting the wooden fishing box on the back and breaking it off I got 3 brused vertibrae and lost about a week of my holidays (which I still can't remember!!) and ended up missing out seeing the new melenium come in as I was bed ridden!!
The second was riding my fathers rather decrpit TS185 on the Stop Banks near the river in Otorohanga I went up one side too quick and both front and back breaks weren't really up to the task so I tootled on down the other side taking out 3 battons and bending the bike on the strainer. I got back on rode home and was unable to walk for about 4 days as my knee balloned up to 3 times the normal size and went bluey black.

[TonyB]

OAB... where's YOUR post dude?

OK- Stupid act number 1
When young and stupider, I used to have a bad habit of hooning around town passing anything that moved (or didn't move) up the inside at high speed. Once I was passing a line of traffic that had left a set of lights a while before I got there. At the front was a bus. I was blasting up the inside coming up on the bus when it started to pull in to a bus stop, as buses often do. There was a car parked at the front of the bus stop. I was going to fast too stop
or weave, so my only option was to drop a gear and nail it. I shot through the gap at a very high speed with inches to spare. I can still remeber the wide eyed open mouthed expressions of the waiting passengers as I shot past. Amazingly I had enough sense to stop passing up the inside after that.

Stupid Act number 2
I used to have a Kwaka GPZ750R which was blessed with a centre stand. I used to start it up on the stand and then rock it forward and ride off. Once I was sitting in the Buxton car park in Nelson about to ride off. A couple of rather nice chicks were walking towards me, so being a complete tosser I thought I'd give them a demo. Rocked the bike off the stand, gave it some herbs and went to pull away..... as I let the clutch out the revs dropped, almost as though the back brake was on. So I tried again, with a few more revs... same result. Weird. So I tried one more time, with maximum revs.... the engine died down again- just as well, if it had taken off it probably would have launched me into the next row of cars. The two girls were laughing out loud by now. So I hoped off to see what the hell was wrong, went to put down the side stand.... OOOPS! It was already down. The saftey switch was linked to the clutch.

[myvice]

Endless ones on a motorbike, but my personal favourite is on the push-bike...
Riding along and I noticed my quick release for the front wheel is sticking out a bit, no worries, get a bit of speed up (don’t stop and do it up, that’s just stupid) un-clip (lock in type shoes, clip into the pedals) and give the offending leaver a whack with the side of my foot. And another, started to slow down so I clipped back in and got moving at a better pace again...
One more kick should do it...
Foot slipped past the leaver, behind the forks and in-between the spokes.
Stops you real fast, lucky I landed on my head, so apart from a broken toe I wasn’t too badly hurt!

[riffer]

um ...

well this was this time once (when I was younger) on my newish GPZ750, and on a dare I wheelied it past my girlfriends house (all her girlfriends were watching too and a few of my mates) in Oxford Terrace...

Unfortunately right past an unmarked cop car.

doing 50km/hr over the speed limit.

Had to go to Lower Hutt District Court to defend the careless driving (sic) charge ...

and got let off after a long bullshit story about how I'd had the carbs pulled apart that morning and the throttle had stuck when I took off.

[WINJA]

IN THE 80S I WAS SHOWING ABOUT 5 GIRLS I KNOW HOW GOOD I CAN WHEELSTAND I STARTED TO GO OVER , SLAMMED ON THE BACK BRAKE, GOT THROWN ONTO THE TANK LANDING ON MY NUTS , THEN HIT THE CURB AND CRASHED , THEN A FEW MONTHS LATTER SHOWING OFF TO THE SAME GIRLS A WHEEL STAND AT THE DOMAIN I GOT THROWN OFF THE SIDE OF THE BIKE HELD ON AND DRAGGED OFF THE ROAD AND DOWN THE BANK , THIS TIME ONE OF THE GIRLS GAVE ME A ROOT , WHICH IS WHAT I WANTED ALL ALONG

[riffer]

I can just see it...

Are you sure you didn't grow up in the Hutt Valley Winja?

[WINJA]

I can just see it...

Are you sure you didn't grow up in the Hutt Valley Winja?

I SPENT TIME THERE , IM NOT ALLOWED BACK

[SPORK]

I SPENT TIME THERE , IM NOT ALLOWED BACK

NO, PLEASE COME BACK TO UPPER HUTT, WINJA. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU HERE. CAN YOU AT LEAST PULL A SWEET WHEELIE PAST UPPER HUTT COLLEGE?

[WINJA]

NO, PLEASE COME BACK TO UPPER HUTT, WINJA. WE NEED MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU HERE. CAN YOU AT LEAST PULL A SWEET WHEELIE PAST UPPER HUTT COLLEGE?

MIGHT SEE YA SOON , IM DOING A WHRILWIND TOUR OF NZ , IM ATTEMPTING TO HAVE A MASTY IN EVERY MCDONALDS TOILET IN NZ

[Goblin]

Haha! Some good minties moments.

When I was about 17 my boyfriend & I had a 750 Katana. I rode it to work a few times and was feeling extra confident one day on my way back from lunch. My workplace was down a dead-end road with these huge steel & wire gates padlocked together. There were pea-stones all over the last 50m or so of road. Being a lunch hour, the whole of the industrial area was fairly quiet and our Kat had a nice throaty sounding four into one so I gave it a wee handful, just to show off to all the lads watching me from the sawmill. Before I knew it I had to slow down for the driveway but found I was locked up, skidding along the pea-stones towards the gates at the end of the road. I kept it upright and gently bumped the gates, then forgot to put my feet down and over we went. The guys all laughed the arses off and I had to yell out to my workmates to help me pick the bike up. Broke the right indicator and spent the afternoon repairing the damage(boss was into bikes too). I still dont think the boyfriend ever knew I'd dropped it.

[cowboyz]

I brought a TT250 which was a nice upgrade from my TF125 and took it down to a mates farm, where his house was in the middle of a paddock. He had a Trojen200 so we decided on a drag to show off the TT. Went at max revs and left him behind. Soon to find out that the paddock his house was in was actually 2 paddocks. Collected a 3 wire electric fence at top speed and bloody near cut me in half. Then to complicate the issue the wire which had a crap-load of power running through it got tangled in my leg and I was lying on the ground getting a damn good shock and had to wait for my mate to go down the the sheds and turn the power off so I could get the wire off me. My 5 min old TT250 ended up half way across the next paddock somewhere......

[Teflon]

Getting off a four and onto a twin. leave the first set of lights slipping the clutch, having the front end launch smacking me in the head.

only did it once..