PARKING! - Some Pointers...

[Korea]

Nice post. Now I'm a bit fuzzy, is Twat pronounced like "What" or "cat"(minus the C and plus Tw ) ???

[MisterD]

Nice post. Now I'm a bit fuzzy, is Twat pronounced like "What" or "cat"(minus the C and plus Tw ) ???

IMO It's best pronounced to rhyme with "cat", even better if you can generate a reasonable approximation to a scouse accent. That gives it a much better capacity to convey real venom.

[Virago]

#1. If you’re the first rider to arrive at a ‘Bike’ parking space:
It’s a better option to park your bike at either end of the space available as opposed to parking in the middle....

.......Unless of course it's a normal car-park space, then the first bike should park in the middle. To park at one end seems to invite a cage driver to have a go at squeezing in to the free space, usually using the "Braille" method of parking.....

[justsomeguy]

I guess I'm a TWAT cos I always park my bike in sight of where I will be. Usually on the footpath right next to the place of entrance of where I'll be or jammed between two pillars or a wall so it can't be tipped over unless someone lifts the bike and kicks the sidestand out. I never park on the road if I can avoid it.

Another thing for newbies - never park your bike with the front facing downhill, your bike could roll of the stand, leaving it in gear is a good idea.

[Kendog]

And by no means may you EVER park your car, truck, van, taxi, bus or any other vehicle other than a bike within a designated bike area. EVER.

Totally agree with this, but does that mean a bike can not park in a 'car park'?

[justsomeguy]

Totally agree with this, but does that mean a bike can not park in a 'car park'?

No it doesn't. You can park anywhere a car is legally allowed to park depending on the parking conditions.

Had a bitch back into my old bike, drop it and argue that......

[thehollowmen]

And when lining up while driving... please do not grab your frount brake while moving forward. it is a VERY easy way to put the bike down onto the bike beside you.

[Karma]

Another thing for newbies - never park your bike with the front facing downhill, your bike could roll of the stand, leaving it in gear is a good idea.

I don't usually worry about that... my bike is always parked in gear and so won't roll far enough for the stand to come up.

Just have to make sure if parking on uneven ground that the bike isn't gonna lean too much when putting it on the stand. This is typically noticed on sand / gravel and when parking laterally on a hill.

[janno]

Who's been to Melbourne? The pavements are hugely wide and bikes are encouraged to park wherever the hell they want to as long as Mum and Pram or chasp in wheelchair can get out of their parked car.

The council tried to ban bikes on pavements a while back so the two wheeled mob actually united for once, went in to the city early one business day and took up all the carparks they could manage, one bike per space. Caused absolute chaos apparently and the council backed down quick smart.

I have had the bike roll off the stand when still a greenhorn, carefully put it in neutral and carefully turned it around to point downhill so it pointed the right way for leaving. May I say from experience, this is the sort of mistake you only make once!! Luckily, I've talked to lots of guys with not too much bullshit ego who have admitted to that one too when they were tiny tots.

[R1madness]

Piece of cake, move the bastard to a car park and let it get a ticket.

Eh? I have never had a ticket for parking in a "car" park. In fact if they ever do give me one for that they will have to put me in jail as i would never pay it . We pay more rego than bloody cars so F*CK them. We use less gas, polute less, cost less in road repairs, ease congestion blah blah blah...... useless bloody local govt. See ya in court arseholes.

[robnz]

have been parking my bike opposite the uni library, while there is plenty of space during summer school, when uni starts in earnest a parking space can be hard to find. Things are not made easier with one twat on a kawasaki parking on a 45 degree opposite angle then everybody else. hopefully one day somebody is going to teach this person the rules of parking

[myvice]

Parked 2mm in front of a car while a mate did the same behind it.
Sat in a cafe watching for about an hour pissing ourselves laughing as she stomped about having a big hissy caus she couldn’t get out of the "Bike Parking Only" space.
Thought she was going to run them over for a while!
Funny tho...
Had to wait till she stormed off befor we got our bikes, I think she would have killed us if we had gone near her!

[Slingshot]

Parked 2mm in front of a car while a mate did the same behind it.
Sat in a cafe watching for about an hour pissing ourselves laughing as she stomped about having a big hissy caus she couldn’t get out of the "Bike Parking Only" space.
Thought she was going to run them over for a while!
Funny tho...
Had to wait till she stormed off befor we got our bikes, I think she would have killed us if we had gone near her!

I did that too once...I was riding my wife scooter and this bitch had parked in the bike park I used to use. I parked in front of her right at the end of the bike park...she came out of the cafe across the road, jumped in her 4WD and continued to drive over the scooter.
Apparently she stopped and stuck her head out the window and then drove off.
The guys in the Cafe saw it all and it was a regular customer, gave me her details and then asked me to let them know if she came good...otherwise they were going to rstop serving her (Cafe La'afare (sp?), good bunch!)

[froggyfrenchman]

Worked in a supermarket while in high school. There was a bike park right next to the door. Problem is, the boss had a habbit of parking his fargn giant yuppy 4wd in said bike park in such a manner i couldnt get out. One afternoon i called a towie, he ended up having to pay to have his vehicle towed from land he owned. Funnily enough he never parked that 4x4 there again, and i got a payrise the next week!

[myvice]

Subtlety pays off then?