note: does not apply to 6 hundies or seven fiddies (unless somebody lets me testride one for verification)
1. I can't afford one.
2. Anybody with twennie sumthink grand (new) or slightly less 2nd hand can buy one, and be much faster than me. Discounting the fact that anybody with another brand / model could also be much faster than me, the complete lack of effort required to be much faster than me on a thou is not quite right by my calculations. Rodney Hide, Paul Homes, Simon Dallow, The Pope, Peewee Herman, Richard Prebble, Judy Bailey, Mick Jagger, Jim Morrison - you name it, they could all be much faster than me. Plain f*&ing wrong.
3. Hero Stories. Before my thou experience, anybody propping the bar up at the local regailing the locals with stories of 160km/h 2nd gear wheelies was a bit of a ledge in my book. Worthy of a shout - top shelf (speights) probably. On a thou? still worthy of a shout, but DB - maybe Heinekin or Stella. C'mon - now even Dangerous has high speed wheelie stories but on the old faithful (which he wasn't faithful too) he struggled getting the front wheel over the driveway curb. Nuff said. Course i could also have had a mono storie but chose instead to respect the owners property (and the fact that i threw my only test ride away by chucking the missus on the comfy wee pillion seat and scaring the thong off her).
4. Suzuki thoughtfully provided the thou with druglike addictive qualities and a schlong enlarger at no extra charge.
5. Monopoly. Not the game. The racetrack. Is it good for the sport? I can't be arsed looking up the nationals results, but from memory Shirrifs cleaned up the 600 proddy class with only Derek MacAdam spoiling the zook party. Production thou's? Stroud, Giles, Clee, Charlton. True, maybe those guys coulda cleaned up on another brand - but they were smart enough to be riding the most competitive machinery. Maybe if Rees was still riding but...
6. The government of this fine land are always trying to legislate our right to injure ourselves away. Gun laws, OSH, Anti-binge drinking / speeding / smoking ad's etc. Why has the thou escaped attention? Its a f&*king lethal weapon.
Anyway's - i reckon anybody who can't get round Ruapuna in 1:45 on a thou (apart from 30UTD, cos he's a top bloke who loans his bike out to complete deviants) should be forced to part ways - at a reasonable price, say $1000 bucks.
PM me if you're a bit of a nana and you own one. You'll be doing the right thing. I have purchase clearance from the missus who thought my performance later that evening was well worth the dribbling all afternoon.
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