A laugh for you, not me.

[kiwifruit]

Thanks for sharing, love your story telling skills

[2_SL0]

a REAL butt clenching moment.

[DemonWolf]

absolutely topnotch story... Hope everything is fine.

[beyond]

As you were in the country, why not just find the nearest suitable clump of trees , or convenient ditch ?

Don't worry mate, I was thinking that all along but just as well I made it home. It wasn't pretty I can tell you. The hills around here are brown enough anyway The ditch? Well you know how the conservation department has this thing about polluting rivers? That lot would have killed all marine life in a 100 square kilometre radius and caused a mass evacuation.

Thankfully it was just me that mass evacuated. At least being home the cleanup operation was easier. Well, sort of.

[Colapop]

A turgid expose!

[froggyfrenchman]

very brave of you to admit to this! i too have been caught out by medication ididnt know would have that effect... luckily for me i was just 5mins from the pub when those rumblings started!

[Winston001]

CleanPrep eh! Wonderful stuff. I've had to take it and never moved more than 5m from the lavatory.

Wonderful story - my guts churned with horror when I got to the bit about you eyeing up your bike. And then you got on it. Brave man.

And I endorse your recommendation regarding the barium enema. Sod that again - except that it might save your life.

Personally I was found to have divirticulitis of the sigmoid colon and subsequently a nice masked man with lots of very sharp things removed the troublesome bit of tube.

Not a procedure I'd recommend either. So the message is fellas - eat your bran. Roughage is the thing.

[Back Fire]

thats some funny shit... could this be the reason you were going so fast on sat aswell?

[ManDownUnder]

That's liek a stand up routine... except sittin' down...

DAMN that's funny. I love toilet humour anyway - but something I can relate to??

EXCELLENT - JUST EXCELLENT!!!!!

[MD]

Great read. I had one of those once. 'Gave me new meaning to feeling uncomfortable, waiting for my butt to explode as they pump ya full of leftovers from Chernobal. But here's a scary thought. I seem to remember I enjoyed some of it? ... nice Nurse, that's right, that's the part I enjoyed.
And I know what you mean about getting hot flushes coming in waves wondering which one will break the dike (shit, more homo lingo sneaking up on me!)

[kels]

You poor thing! Sorry to say this...but...thanks for the laugh! Bling comin your way :O)

[onearmedbandit]

Everyone else has made the obvious comments so I will resist, damn funny read!

[Kali]

haha hilarious thanks for sharing!!

[Mental Trousers]

I had to go and take a dump after reading that :slap:

[Oakie]

Brilliant! But now I'm in trouble with our HR manager for laughing hysterically as she was talking to my co-worker about someone's position being made redundant. Doh!

If I had time I'd recount my story about stuff I took to block me up for an important day while I had giardia (causes absolute screaming shits)... and the fun I had when the medication wore off. But no. It's home time.