Cow vs Bike

[kro]

Finn is obviously slipping, so I'll say it for him.....What was Helen Clark doing in the middle of the road to begin with........ ?

Thankfully, as you said, noone was hurt. I haven't hit anything larger than a bird, and that was scary enough.

[Edbear]

we may be lucky enough to have KB return to "sanity"

[Finn]

As soon as someone shows me how to stop half a ton of panicked running beast without a halter I'm there otherwise WTF?

Well, you manged to stop.

[DMNTD:Me]

The Farmer is generally not liable unless there is some suggestion that the farmer was negligent in their duty regarding fencing etc.

I think the farmer is liable, that's what public liability insurance is for!!!!!!!

From what was experienced by myself and a "few" others up North,the farmer is not liable unless it is after a certain time at night...twilight from memory etc,and yes the state of said farmer's fences is taken into consideration too.

Have had MANY close calls with cows/horses/sheep/dogs/etc and a general rule of thumb is to pick a line and nail it!!(if you're unable to stop safely )
The faster you're past them the better because as mentioned they are a scatty bunch and you never know which way they'll head...ie: start left,head right. Hawks are another...

[SixPackBack]

Have had MANY close calls with cows/horses/sheep/dogs/etc and a general rule of thumb is to pick a line and nail it!!(if you're unable to stop safely )
The faster you're past them the better because as mentioned they are a scatty bunch and you never know which way they'll head...ie: start left,head right. Hawks are another...

And Women, don't get me started on them

[McJim]

Well, you manged to stop.

Yeah, but I was wearing my gimp mask at the time...it has a halter attached.

[Lias]

DESPERATE DAN
ƒ A D Bm E C#m

The big fat chud wobbled home one night, singing:
'Woah, Maccy Maccy'
After twenty eight pints.
Had a bit of trouble getting the key in the door,
His belly dragged him downwards and his face hit the floor.
Spilt curry down his shirt, soaked through to the vest,
Pisses in his jeans as he tries to undress,
Trousers round his ankles, he bangs into the door,
Decides to have a piss in the cutlery drawer

Then he starts to vomit on the telly by the wall,
She must have been to Comet,
Coz that cunt wasn't there before.

He pukes and he pukes, but there's no stopping,
New picture on the stairs, the old bag's been shopping.
He spews and he spews then its time to relax,
He props himself up on the edge of the bath.
One last puke strains his whole body,
Out of his arse plops a vindaloo jobby.
Bile out the front end, bum-sick out the back,
Vomit in the toilet, diarrhoea all over the bath.

Then his buttock hits the hot tap and his chubby legs collapse,
His jeans are round his ankles,
The big fat bastard falls backwards into the bath

His arms and legs are waving, they're flapping like fuck,
But the shit's sealed him in, and the fat cunt's stuck.
He flounders in the tub, but he's a perfect fit,
Turds down his back, his front's borted in sick.
He grabs at the taps to pull himself clear,
But he hasn't got a clue about the trouble at the rear,
He crawls into bed, covered in shite,
And tries to cuddle up to his extremely fat and ugly wife.

She hits him with a small brush
He's landed on the floor, she says:
'You smelly fat walrus, you live at number 24.'

©1990 The Macc Lads

N.B.- 'Borted' = covered/ drenched/ soaked/ coated/ caked/ etc (usually with something loud and powerful).

N.B.- ‘Woah Maccy Maccy’= A football chant sung at the Moss Rose: a 1972 tune by Giorgio Moroder
(made famous by Chicory Tip)... all together....
“Woah, Maccy Maccy; Maccy, Maccy, Maccy, Maccy Macclesfield”

Mp3 available on request.. classic song :-)

[Aitch]

He's responsible for keeping his animals off the road. Unless he can prove they were let out of the paddock by some miscreant, he should cough up. Again, this is why they have public liability insurance!

[NotaGoth]

Just about hit a dog one night... Partner was driving.. He didn't see it.. Suddenly he's got me screaming for him to stop... Slammed on brakes and stopped just in front of some idiots dog....

Have only ever seen the damage done to a BMW (car) when someone I know hit a horse... The locals seem to think its cool to let their dogs, pigs, cows, horses roam on the roads at nights.. Oh and theres even emus!!!!!!!!! Its pathetic...

Horse must have literally rolled.. Ended up hitting the very front part of the roof/windscreen.... Pushed that right in and just about crushed the passengers head... Killed the horse.. And just about killed both driver and passenger....

Saddest part is.... Partner was driving through the area the next day... And to his amazement.... Another 6 horses out roaming on the ride... And 1 dead horse still in the ditch.... You'd think the owner would have opened their eyes... OBVIOUSLY NOT!!!!!! Unfit to own an animal.. And they obviously don't care about the fact that they just about killed someone with their stupidity... Wasn't the horses fault... They don't know any better..

After seeing the aftermath of horse versus car... I'd hate to think about cow verse bike... You're friends very very lucky... Also in saying that.. I hope the cows ok... Real horrible to not know wether it died in pain... Or wether its ok... Poor thing..

[NotaGoth]

He's responsible for keeping his animals off the road. Unless he can prove they were let out of the paddock by some miscreant, he should cough up. Again, this is why they have public liability insurance!

I'm also pretty sure owners are liable... Then again thats "IF" you can track them down...