Motorcycles and marriage

[Street Gerbil]

It so appears that a majority of people I ride with, I work with, I studied at school a quarter century ago with, I served in the army with, and just most of my friends in general are single, divorced, or married for the second time. This "happily ever after" thing must be really overrated.

[deeknow]

Although.. I am riding the day before the wedding... riding the day of the wedding and riding the day after the wedding..... and on into the future.

Nice work Cowboyz... Keep it up, while you can.

I don't often get the wife on the back of the bike, but during the wedding ceremony I did get the celebrant to sneak the following into the middle of the vows which she wasnt expecting...

"And I promise to go for a ride on the back of the bike once a fortnight"

got a laugh from the folks at the wedding, the missus didnt exactly take it on board though, hasn't been on the bike since then

[cowboyz]

if she didnt follow that bit of the vows does she pay special attention to the love, honor and OBEY part of it?

[yod]

I rode for about 5 years in my younger days but then did the corporate blah blah and didnt have a bike for about the next 10 (i met mrs yod 6 years ago)

so anyway...we got married 4 months ago and I decided to get back into it and bought a bike the weekend before the wedding

she was a bit shocked cos she didn't know me in my previous biker days but she's all good now....

gee what a bummer...now i have to sort out some riding gear for her and a bigger bike so she can pillion in slightly more comfort than the lil ol' viffer can afford....ahwell, life's hard, but i think i can handle it.....

you rock mrs yod

[deeknow]

if she didnt follow that bit of the vows does she pay special attention to the love, honor and OBEY part of it?

Obey?? sorry, don't see that word in my dictionary

[Cibby]

i think there are two main issues when a wife is unhappy with hubby getting/keeping a bike..

1. he might get hurt or die
2. i'll never see him

i've had heaps of bikers other halves say that if their partner goes off it is for the whole day and family time suffers...

i think there simply needs to be a balance..

biking is like the naughty mistress... you just need to convince your partner to enjoy threesums

[yod]

if their partner goes off it is for the whole day and family time suffers...

i think there simply needs to be a balance..

you been talking to my wife?

[Paul in NZ]

When you get married - you make a serious commitment to each other and that means you will both have to make compromises and sacrifices - end of story. They say 'united in marriage', ie the two become one, not keep on selfishly doing whatever comes into your head at the time because you 'deserve' it...

When Vicki and i got together I was a bit of a low life scum bag just returned from my OE with $20 in my pocket and 2 old bikes in the shed. One of those bikes was an irreplaceable mid 60's Rickman Metisse. 18 months later I sold that bike to fund a modest engagement ring. Vicki realised the significance of that sacrifice and to this day - it was the best investment I have EVER made.

Naturally - we were as poor as churchmice, purchased a rooted old house which was lovingly renovated while we raised a squalling bunch of ankle biters and yes - I still kept riding but it was on stuff I could afford or could make a $$ on. A Honda C50 Cub (bent ex valve) and the pick of em was a very early Suzuki TS250 'Savage' purchased in 3 boxes and ridden to work rain or shine for years. (made $180 profit) and for a couple of years i just had bits of bikes to play with and really - with 3 kids under 5 and an old house to renovate there was no time for real riding at all even if we did have the cash.

Once the house was finished I was lucky enough to be working in an industry that paid good wages and penal rates at a time when i could have worked 24 hours a day - we worked 11 hours a day and saturdays and we actually saved some cash, enough to carpet and vinyl the whole house (last job to finish it). We were literally taking the last trailer load of rubbish to the tip in our Triumph 2500 TC when we went past Bland Brothers in ChCh and parked out side was the TR6C and a T120. I told Vicki that the TR was one of my dream bikes and that one day I was going to have one - just like that one...

After dumping the rubbish Vicki drove home which was odd - because she does not like driving me - apparently I'm too anal... Anyway, she drove back past Blands, threw a massive U turn (forgetting about the trailer) and parked outside. She looked at her ring and told me to go buy the bike which was exactly the amount we had in our savings for carpet....

I protested and pretended i didn't really want it but she was quite 'definate' about it. Well I purchased it, worked my arse off every weekend for months to save the $$ for the carpet which was laid and the house sold to move to a bigger place and I've still got that bike, she still has that ring and we still have each other and life could not be better. (been together 28 plus years)

Sometimes you have to pay stuff forward and invest in a relationship. You can't be sure of the return you will get but nothing grows without you giving a bit of yourself.

Paul N

(still pretending I like to garden and Vicki still pretends she like bikes)

[Blackbird]

When you get married - you make a serious commitment to each other and that means you will both have to make compromises and sacrifices - end of story.

(still pretending I like to garden and Vicki still pretends she like bikes)

Superbly put Paul Don't think there is anything else to say except Jennie and I have identical gardening and biking views, haha.

[gunnyrob]

my bike lasted all of one year before I had to sell it to get a station wagon once the ex was duffed up.

Now I'm divorced I'm getting a new bike after 14 years without one.

[Pwalo]

Mrs P and I have been married for almost 27 years. When we were married we only had a m'cycle as transport, and most of our friends did as well (we were mainly poor Uni students and cars were just too expensive).

Perhaps I don't fit the 'biker' profile, because I do love riding, working on my bike, watching racing, reading the latest mags ,etc, but I've never felt deprived because circumstances haven't allowed me to own a bike. This certainly wasn't possible when we were first time home owners, and parents.

Stangely enough it was my wife who suggested that I buy a cheap bike to commute on about eight years ago. FT400, GS500E, GS500K1, and now the Fenland Express. It's all good.

So stop being such a miserable lot. Motorcycles and marriage aren't incompatable, but sometimes you just have to compromise (and marry the right person).

[vifferman]

You know there are some even happily married like me and Mrs merv. Geez we met in 1975 - I had a Honda then, she had a Yamaha. Now I've got two Hondas and a Yamaha and she's got a Yamaha and a Suzuki.

Huh.
You must be old, Merv.
I met the vifferbabe in February, 1978, and it's our 25th weeding anniverserary in September.
Of course, I didn't have a bike when I met her - sold it a few months before - so she didn't know I was into bikes. Caused a few problems along the way, and every bike I've had has been "the last bike you'll ever own - so make the most of it!"
Things changed when we almost had a marriage bust-up a few years ago (due to my mentalness) and she decided to start taking an interest in my interests, and stopped hassling me quite so much about spending money on bike stuff. Then I took her for a couple of quiet rides on the FahrtSturm (yes, it *is* actually possible to ride one sedately, even with loud zorsts), and she was hooked. But the real hooking point was when we went on an impromptu ride to Tauranga one day, and hooked up with two other couples doing exactly the same thing. Then on the way back, we met a group of older riders coming back from a longish ride around Taranaki and the Central Plateau. She was absolutely blown away by how other bikers could be so friendly, and instant mates.

Then there was the WindowShoppingForAHelmetAndComingHomeWithABike episode.
Her doing.
It was OUR first bike.
But apparently, it's "no longer OUR bike because of all the tinkering you've done to it".
Dunno how that works, but apparently unauthorised tinkering and farkling has ruined the VFR.

[ManDownUnder]

There are some things you'll see eye to eye on, and others you never will. If bikes fall into the latter category find out why. Maybe she's simply worried about you (getting hurt etc)?

Maybe she doesn't like them and simply wants to change you, in which case, talk about it, tell her what you think - and agree to disagree if it comes to that...

If oit comes down to marriage vs motorbikes, and you have to make a choice - I'd say you have othr problems entirely and the bike issue is merely a symptom.

5c poorer... off I go into the new day

[SVboy]

F%*k marriage and bikes! Yeah, if you chose well and have a partner into bikes,well done you. But for fwits like myself who made the wrong call, much time has been wasted off bikes. Still, nothing a painful messy divorce couldnt fix and here I am, a mere 20yrs later, on my sexy beast![The bike I mean!]

[MSTRS:Me]

Sometimes you have to pay stuff forward and invest in a relationship. You can't be sure of the return you will get but nothing grows without you giving a bit of yourself.

Aint that the truth!!