The Great KB Lanesplitting Poll

**Firefight** · 15th February 2004, 05:40

Originally Posted by Zed

...those biker couriers are another story! They go through red lights, go the wrong way up one-way streets, & I have known them to park on roundabouts- what do you do for a job again CK??

Zed

**Big Dog** · 16th February 2004, 16:52

Originally Posted by DebK

My Sad Wee Story
On way home last month & all 3 lanes of traffic was stopped. Cruised at no more than jogging pace between inside & middle lane. Jerk in a courier van (NZ COURIERS!) yelled out "F*cken B*tch!" (I was in skirt & heals so gender was obvious) and spat at me. I was so stunned & revolted that all I wanted to do was get as far away as possible. Wished later that I had stopped and hurled abuse but I'm not that quick a retort-queen as I'd like to be!

Ring New Zealand Couriers. I've had a couriers contract cancelled without notice for road raging. I have also had a driver fined a $1k for deliberately cutting me off.

He who laughs last......

**DebK** · 16th February 2004, 18:51

Originally Posted by Big Dog

Ring New Zealand Couriers. I've had a couriers contract cancelled without notice for road raging. I have also had a driver fined a $1k for deliberately cutting me off.

He who laughs last......

Didn't take any details down & canna be sh*gged now. Sad bugga that he was, I'm over it now. Makes for a good story anyways.

**Redstar** · 16th February 2004, 19:56

so we all now know the rule?
you can only pass traffic on the left within the same lane if the traffic is completely stationary or turning right. you should indicate a lane change 3 seconds prior. I have spent $450 on this lesson and stupid while it often is I,m sick of giving the away. Suggested defences I havent tried yet.

1. I didnt know the rule its my first experience (niave)
2. I had to do it I was forced into the lane by a nutter
3. I'm drunk (Blood test will later prove your innocence?)
4. my dad is Policeman. (and not a rapist)
5. Im a rich important person
6. I though they were all Chinese and had simply failed to indicate their intention to turn right(works in east tamaki )
7. can you put the fine on my district court $1 week drip fund heres my account number
8. its entrapment I'll sue
9. show me your warrent card your not a real cop?
10. Paul swain is my mate do you really think this is a good idea
11. what cars did I pass what were their rego numbers (Memory test for them)
12. Bullshit (instant rapore established)
13. I was taking evasive action to avoid a cute little family of ducks (animal lover)
15. I.m pregnant and have pains (for the ladies or longhaired fat blokes only)

None of this will work but your dead meat anyway so dont bother being nice

**wkid_one** · 16th February 2004, 20:47

I am unsure why you missed 14 - but here it is

14. Fuck off and deal with real criminals you revenue collecting, should be paid by IRD, turn up 5 days late to a real crime scene git.

And I will pay $50 to the first person who uses it

**Zed** · 16th February 2004, 21:08

Originally Posted by wkid_one

I am unsure why you missed 14 - but here it is

14. Fuck off and deal with real criminals you revenue collecting, should be paid by IRD, turn up 5 days late to a real crime scene git.

And I will pay $50 to the first person who uses it

Just obey the law Cincinnati Kid!

Havn't you learned that lesson yet?

**Coldkiwi** · 17th February 2004, 11:55

Originally Posted by Kwaka-Kid

is CK a bike curier? no! hes some electro-physic-geek or somthing aintcha CK? (in a nice way u know, like yeah)

no, but I'd be tempted to give it a go as a change of pace from acoustics some day. Maybe when I move to Italy- hows that for a licence to cause havoc?- Italian bike courier!!
I can relate to their manner anyway (I work in the city so routinely do battle with blind drivers/pedestrians, kerbs and footpaths). I'm always late so I reckon the built in urgency in my riding would serve me well!

**wkid_one** · 17th February 2004, 17:58

Originally Posted by Zed

Just obey the law Cincinnati Kid!

Havn't you learned that lesson yet?

What so you have never sped, accidently crossed a centre line with indicating, pull a wheel stand, not fully come to a stop at a stop sign, never gone around a roundabout the wrong way, never passed on a yellow, ridden your bike on the footpath, parked on the footpath.....and the list goes on....

Psalm Dan 001 from the book of Wkid verse 2.1.6.3 - He who rideth a bike, shallth be exempth from the wrath of the Almightly in the eventh of minor traffic offences upon said day of judgementh.

As you can appreciate, I am writing my own 'bible' and therefore creating my own deity - I am calling him Bob. And Bob lives underwater (which is the equivilent of heaven). By my logic, I can therefore write my own 'bible' to accomodate my own said vices (cigars, porn, drink, porn, bikes, porn....) - and upon the day of reckoning be free to enter said Utopia with a blessing from Bob. This way I can truly embrace my higher being (out of the gutters you DM) and continue life knowing that I am living with the blessing of Bob and am assured a place in the Nirvana that is Heaven. My logic seems infallible. Plus - my heaven will have all the latest model motorbikes ( which are impossible to crash), a track closely resembling Suzuka, lots of naked chicks, free booze, cigars that don't cause cancer, and the list goes on. Now I have created it, I can't wait to get there.....well, I can - but it will be fun when I do get there.

**Big Dog** · 17th February 2004, 18:07

Originally Posted by wkid_one

Psalm Dan 001 from the book of Wkid verse 2.1.6.3 - He who rideth a bike, shallth be exempth from the wrath of the Almightly in the eventh of minor traffic offences upon said day of judgementh.

What are those two quotes again?
Judge not least ye .........
The one about the mote in your neighbours eye?
I'm sure Z can fill us in.

**Batcerb** · 17th February 2004, 18:26

Coldkiwi -
That story about the Ninja 7 was brilliant! When will cagers learn ...

**Zed** · 17th February 2004, 22:21

Originally Posted by wkid_one

What so you have never sped, accidently crossed a centre line with indicating, pull a wheel stand, not fully come to a stop at a stop sign, never gone around a roundabout the wrong way, never passed on a yellow, ridden your bike on the footpath, parked on the footpath.....and the list goes on....

Psalm Dan 001 from the book of Wkid verse 2.1.6.3 - He who rideth a bike, shallth be exempth from the wrath of the Almightly in the eventh of minor traffic offences upon said day of judgementh.

As you can appreciate, I am writing my own 'bible' and therefore creating my own deity - I am calling him Bob. And Bob lives underwater (which is the equivilent of heaven). By my logic, I can therefore write my own 'bible' to accomodate my own said vices (cigars, porn, drink, porn, bikes, porn....) - and upon the day of reckoning be free to enter said Utopia with a blessing from Bob. This way I can truly embrace my higher being (out of the gutters you DM) and continue life knowing that I am living with the blessing of Bob and am assured a place in the Nirvana that is Heaven. My logic seems infallible. Plus - my heaven will have all the latest model motorbikes ( which are impossible to crash), a track closely resembling Suzuka, lots of naked chicks, free booze, cigars that don't cause cancer, and the list goes on. Now I have created it, I can't wait to get there.....well, I can - but it will be fun when I do get there.

IIIIII love it when you take the bait Wkid...of course I was joking- couldn't you tell by my winking smiley? :sneaky2:

You go ahead and write your own bible (means book), looks like you've already made a start! If you get just ONE other person to put their faith and trust in "Bob" for their salvation (excluding derilicts, mental patients, and BBunny!) then I will make a public acknowledgement that you "aren't" full of hot air!

I'll give you credit where it's due though- you do have quite an imagination about the afterlife...however, what the Bible says about heaven far exceeds anything you could ever think up in your mortal head.

Note: Criticising my belief system & God is an grave error on your part, for it is my strongest area of defense.

Kind regards,

Zed

**wkid_one** · 18th February 2004, 06:31

Originally Posted by Zed

IIIIII love it when you take the bait Wkid...of course I was joking- couldn't you tell by my winking smiley? :sneaky2:

Note: Criticising my belief system & God is an grave error on your part, for it is my strongest area of defense.

Speaking of taking the bait.......

Who says I was criticising......I was merely presently my alternative religion.

Pop a wheelie

**Coldkiwi** · 18th February 2004, 11:23

they probably won't batcerb but its our duty to educate them! Who said school wasn't any fun?

as for wkid and zed... man, you guys thrash about like a niggly mako shark with a hook through its head. entertaining and all but not much headway being made

**Zed** · 18th February 2004, 11:41

Originally Posted by Coldkiwi

...entertaining and all but not much headway being made

I wouldn't say that bud...I have faith that one day Wkid will see the error of his ways.

Zed

**Trevor Suzuki** · 18th February 2004, 20:20

I was reading on another post about the French guy that went round the Paris peripherique in 11 minutes. The video is downloadable from this site but I don't have the speed to download...anyway I found the original story about this in a French paper and this guy redefines the term lanesplitting. Here are the facts:

The Peripherique is 35.460 kms in length.
It was done in rush hour traffic at 7.30 in the morning!
He completed the circuit in 11 minutes with an average speed of 192.73 km/h on a GSX-R 1100. (I think in about 1991).
In the article the rider (name not given but known as the Black Prince) said he couldn't go over 290 km/h as the camera strapped to the tank got in the way otherwise he usually tops 310 "sans probleme".

It seems the lesson to be learnt from this guy is that with the advances in Video camera technlogy since the early 90's we are no longer hindered by having a brick strapped to our tanks.

Stay lucky!